Aaaaaaaagh!!!! | ADHD Information

Ok had to let THAT out!

So newest thing, go in to check dd last night around bedtime, she quickly hides something under her sheet...........I'm like, ok what is it? Bursts into tears, it's not my fault....sister put these in my bed...........Yahtzee pencils..............and we would write on our sheets with Yahtzee pencils why?????? .

This is after writing on her brand new sneakers (for the second time) a couple of weeks ago and me making her pay me back for the sneakers (she was NOT happy about that).

OK we're going to be 13 and never wrote on things ever. Didnt draw on the wlls or tables when little, why would we start writing on things NOW!

I remember when I was 12 and 13 and my dad finally let me wear jeans to school.  I wrote all over them.  Everybody was writing on their pants.  My 13 year old son has written on a pair of his jeans this year too.  Might just be a way for young teens to start expressing themselves.  Try putting some oxy clean in the washer to get pencil out.  If you want to keep trying to get it out and it doesn't come out the first time don't dry them in washer.  Heat will set the stain.I know I wrote on my stuff too. But after we discussed the sneakers (no punishment as I did do the same thing), I just made a STRONG point about me buying her new sneakers and I expected her to keep them (they cost me .00 as she needs a lift in her shoe for scoliosis). Within a week she wrtoe on them again said she was bored!

i do recognize your  arrrrgh. get that myself  quite a bit.

seems this is a much bigger deal to you than her.

 

does she journal  . or have an art doodle book.

thing is she tried to hide it which may have brought tension into the mix. so it feels like crisis     but is really an opprotunity.

theres no way boredom is the final only answer.

seems like a creative out let for something in her life.

so i suggest both   journal and drawing books .    

you know what ommas you are right. She is a doodler. She has TONS of paper i n her room, which present another WHOLE set of issues like pieces of paper everywhere.....................but I get your point. I guess we need to keep a drawing book next to her night table. Thanks for the suggestion. The other problem though the scribbling on her sneaker happened in school. If we let her doodle during class, she'd get too distracted, but it's a great suggestion for home.

My dd is a doodler as well... what has worked for her is plenty of paper for her to get to and clay!!!!  she loves to play with clay.  Micheal's art store has sculpey clay... very soft clay, easy to use... and bake it for 15 minutes and its done.

it comes in many many different colors and she can be watching tv or talking and playing with the clay at the same time.... her hands are occup. and her brain is more free.. I ask her math questions etc...

One down side... it is hard to get out of carpet... but great fun.

Just a thought about the sneakers... go to wal mart, target... and get her a pair of plain white sneakers and have her decorate them... fabric paints, sew on little buttons...etc...  I realize that the issue is not that she is bored with the shoe and you don't want her to write on them... but, a little outlet might be fun. 

One last thing, when my dd was first dx... her teacher suggested her play with a small amount of silly putty to get her mind clear, to give her hands something to do.... we didn't do it because she was in first grade at the time... and I think the other kids would have wanted it as well.

Well she is 7th grade. We discussed letting her tie gimp or do anything with her hands, but same things, other kids............so..........we'll see. It wasnt about making any kind of design on her sneakers she was literally just scribbling, needed something to do with her hands. When her ADHD symptoms arer oaring (like now) she is SOOOOOOOOOO fidgety. She also has plenty of paper, tehre is even little pieces of paper in the Yahtzee game, there was NO reason for her to writer on her sheet, she did not even think about it, juts pikced up the pencil and started doodling. I dont really even care if there is pencil on her sheets,..............but..............it's just not ok to just write on whatver she wants, and she just starts crying and saying it was her sisters fault . I'm not convinced it is a creative outlet she needs as much as something to do with her hands. I am gettign her new learn to draw books and skecth pads, we have tons, but maybe new ones will hold her interest. She can keep these on her night table for when she's watching t.v.. I guess we need to restock the gimp too.Diane V, Try Mr. Clean magic eraser on the shoes if you cannot get the writing marks off...this stuff has saved my house from looking like a junk yard.

there again  looking back into my child hood .

 i believe i would get into hyper focus and  the do all sorts of pointless things.

smashing piles of bricks  with bats , burning stuff ,scratching on things just to hear the new different sounds sounds . it wasnt really boredom rather an impulse to do what ever.

 i mean theres bordom like  burning newspapers with magnifying glass  and there the impulse takes over and the next thing i know im in the yard burning ant nests.  i look up at my mother with my dads belt . along side  her is my bestfriend  . " im just killing ants" i said  . whap across the face and she beat my friend for letting me do it.

she went away for awhile. my friend only walked by my house from then on. he would ask if i were bored  i always knew he wanted me to go do something. we had abusive parents in common. we never talked about it except i remeber him asking why i do such stupid sh*t that i know is going to piss off my mom.

i remember saying  i dont try to do things like that . i just wind  up doing them and dont even think about it until i get caught.

 

i suffer more now as an adult with not being impulsive enough to get up and just do something.

even if i made a list of a hundred things i could do to make my home a better place  .   i would still  do the stupid stuff. but my life would be better if i catually read the list more often . 

 thats how i journal    -

i read theses posts   type what i think and then i pull some over to my journals.

and i read some of my to lists  .  see i feel as an adult i would be more sucessful if i were more actiive.  

but i know thats not entirely true . not being a slacker would help ease many tensions . but for me to be susessful i have micro manage every ten minutes or i walk off into impulse .

ive used watches that beep , software that reminds , websites that alert , schedules on caleders  , quick guides in my wallet, even hd wife in on it . but never during all that did ever loose the fidgity impulses to wander off during awkwaRD moments.

 

so i agree that the shoes were a destructive , the sheets were too .  but she has some type of impulsive need to   express something with  her pens and pencils.

 

so like your position of getting new paper    , but

i wonder if you took her along to store with out saying why and got in the art supply aisle what she would pick when she wanders off from you?

 

im not saying her and i have anthing in common ,but i  travel at turtle speed sometimes when im being creative.  even picky about paper and supplies.  when someone else gives them to me i just sa thanks    then if i really likes the gift it usually insipres me to pick something out of my own choosing , i get obsessed with it and then leave for a time then impulsivly return to it time and again.

i did that with my first marraige .  in a spiral note book     so many things so long ago still relevant to who i am today   even without her .   thats when i got my journaling bug .

so my advice is to prime this journal/art book with encouragement so that she has something like this to  turn to   if things start to get hard   and she just needs an outlet to be impulsive and channeled into a positive behavior.

ommas39266.4317824074

Feel your pain!!

Dom has to keep his hands busy - especially when the meds are not at their best or he is anxious.  The PSP / gameboy have always helped  - except at bedtime!!!

He has mediation tapes which entertain him. 

As far as doodling - yes his school books and pencil case etc are disgusting.  He needs to doodle to calm his anxiety. 

At school for an activity I have got kids to draw lines from the top of the paper to the bottom and then turn it 90 degrees and repeat.  These could be straight or waves lines.  Then they have to doodle in each square.  Books are then covered in these so that it is an ongoing activity.  Works for the doodles.

Celebrate doodles!!

Have a sheet on a clipboard.  Discuss the value of "graffiti art

Have a special pinboard / picture frame that each completed sheet is displayed for a period of time. 

Time and a place for everything - agree - not on the sheets!!!

I have a 7 year old, so I don't know what's "cool" for a teenager as a fidget object at school.  Would she be willing to squeeze a stress ball, koosh ball, or hackeysack?  When my child needed things to squeeze (pre-meds), we were able to find things that were age and gender appropriate.  In kindergarten, the other boys loved his stretchie lizard!  Another option might be to go with jewelry-style stuff.  Any way to make a coil bracelet acceptable?  I'm talking about those bracelets you can stretch and they snap back into shape.  They're designed to have a place to keep keys, but I've seen kids wear them with the key ring off it (again, this is younger kids.  I don't know about teenagers).  Even the silicone bracelets might be good to fidget with.  I know those aren't as popular this year as previously, but I still see some kids wearing them.  Edited to add:  Probably more appealing to a teen, how about a necklace that has a charm on it?  It would seem "normal" if she fidgeted by sliding the charm up and down the chain.Mom2ADHDboy39269.8259027778