At my wit’s end | ADHD Information

Her social skills group is run by school. It' been terrific! In elementary school it was during the school day and now in middle school it is after school one day a week. My only problem with it at this point is we live in a small town and it's been the same kids in her group now for 5 years. So some of her behaviors (like trying to be funny with bathrrom talk at age 13, not funny anymore) gets sort of overlooked by these kids, like "Oh, that's just her".

So I would talk to school. Also privately look for any group that runs social skills groups for kids with disabilities. I think I've read before you are in Massachusetts? There are a LOT. Most are not covered by insurance though. I am still searching for ones that will take my insurance as my company wont reimburse either. I dont know if you are North, South or West of Boston, but look at Greater Arc of Boston, they are actually mainly for kids on the autism spectrum, but run lots of social skills groups. Kids with autism, PDD, Aspergers all have the same social delays, it doesnt matter why they are there, so dont get held back by looking for one for ADHD kids only. Academy North also has a very good one and a GREAT summer camp. I am sure ARC's summer program is very good too.

Also check with your psychiatrist for referrals, we got the Academy referral from our psychiatrist and the ARC referral form our therapist. I also have afriend whos son has atuism and does a lot of the programs run through ARC.

Thank you for the info Diane V.

I wish our school ran a social skills group. They could also work on bullying. Small town, with snobby parents/kids. Noone seems held accountable for their behavior, except the ones they label early on!

I live on the Northshore and have heard of arc, as well as Academy North.

You know we mainstream my son in camps and he is fine, but he could use a social booste, if you know what I mean.

I was hoping to find one covered by insurance, since I sit here overnight 40 hrs a week for the family insurance!

I wondered even if a company that is for sensory issues - OTA would offer it.

Thank you for the information. You seem real familiar with MA!

My son, age 11, was diagnosed with ADHD at age 8.  He is currently taking Adderall and does well with it... except in the early morning when it has worn off and also in the evening.. again when wearing off.  The problem is not in how we deal with his outbursts or aggression... but how others in our neighborhood and family do.  He is the oldest in the "neighborhood" of kids.  The children range from age 5-6.  They love playing with him.  But, it seems like everytime, he gets too rough or one of them ends up in tears.   One set of parents is somewhat supportive, the other ends up correcting our child right in front of us, making snide comments, calling him names,  etc.  We are at our wit's end. I should add that the less supportive set of parents in the neighborhood  are his aunt and uncle. 

We have toyed with not allowing him to play with these kids.. but what do we do?

Frustration mounts, I am not a person who enjoys confrontation....  in fact I generally run from it.

Hey Diane V,

How did you find a social skills class for your daughter? My son is 10, really nice, but immature and easily overstimulated.

He is not aggressive either, but silly and goofy, like your daughter. I just feel it is time for him to be taught how to act socially.

Did you go through your doctor? Also, have you had any problems with the aggressive kids?

He is a good kid, but need help with social skills, primarily due to his adhd and overstimulation. I believe he thinks that by acting "that" way that the kids are going to like him and what he is doing, but they don't - it annoys them. And he gets sad, over and over again. I hate that he is a loner at times because he doesn't try or has given up trying

He is too smart and nice and kind and considerate and sensitive to not have friends! I pray it all comes together for him in adulthood!

Thanks

We all feel that way at times. It will get better.

ADHD kids are about 30% behind their peers in maturity. This means that your 8 year old son has the maturity of a 5 year old. Keep this in mind and coach him at his maturity level rather than his age. It can also help your sanity if you remember he is not acting immature on purpose, but that it comes with the ADHD.

my daughter is turning 13 and very immature also. She does not act aggressivley, but silly and not how other 13 year old girls act. Social skills groups have helped with some of this.

Vickie is right on with the suggestion of short acting med for the afternoon. If his ADHD is affecting his social life it's something to think about. This way you could give it only when warranted. So if it is middle of winter and he has no obligatins, no need to give him the short acting.

Welcome mom11yrold,

You can implement a positive reinforcement plan like the marble system (top sticied thread) and work on the behaviours that are the most troublesome.

You can also add a low dose of fast acting med to extend the effective time to cover the social interactions. If this disrupts sleep too much you can look at adding something like tenex guanfacine) to cover this period (some kids have problems sleeping when the meds are leaving the system and some actually sleep better on meds). See the tenex thread on the medication board for more info.

There may be social skills classes at a local children's hospital that could help.

Keep in mind that ADHD affects more than just school and poor social interactions can damage self esteem.

Thank you Vickie!  I actually just read the marble idea and I love it!  I have to say I already feel better....It is just sometimes I feel as though I am really losing my mind.