starting a conv. seeing if u can relate | ADHD Information
My grandmother was the one who finally pointed out to me the amount of to-do lists that I make. I would make a list and then never do the stuff on the list. My grandmother thought that I was overwhelming myself with looking at the amount of things on the list. Maybe she was right, I dont' know. But, I quit making so many lists.
I also feel sorry for all the people in my life. I mean, it must suck to have a conversation with someone who doesn't completely listen to you or who is ALWAYS changing the subject . But you know what? How sad is it for us to not have anyone understand the way we are feeling?
Just know that you are not alone.
I was talking to myself once while driving (didn't realize I was doing it out loud) and my husband said or asked something. I told him "Hush! I'm talking to myself, please don't interrupt!" 
I do this all the time I talk to my husband only to actually verbalize one or two sentences of a paragraph then suddenly jump to another paragraph/subject. He gets this blank look like "what the hell are you talking about and what does going to the grocery store have to do with little blue ponies?" (not an actual conversation but you get the idea). Of course in my head I not only finished the paragraph/thought/idea but also changed subjects with lead-in complete sentences. I tell him as such only that I telepathically communicated them to him. And furthermore if he is too dull/slow-witted to keep up and/or has his 'radar' off he just needs to learn to nod his head and act like he understands.
It's a good thing he has a good sense of humor.
ok i am 24 years old. i'm one of the energetic. think out the box adhd person like ya'll. and i joined this message board b/c i feel pretty alone on this. just like i live in a very complicated world. too many thoughts. always going. always thinking. feel like i can't buckle down and fit in a mold of a serious person. its hard to be around quiet people that do things in order.
does anyone here like feel like you need to overcomplicate tasks to satisfy your brain? like adding extra steps. making fun to-do lists. games of everthing? doodling to keep occupied?
i feel like my brain is so random. i feel sorry for people that have conversations with me. i'm jumping between thoughts. i start a sentence how i feel about something but the next sentence is a new thought about it. and they contradict over lap.
its hard to explain this to other people. adhd gets so frustrating. b/c its like this ALL the time. oh yeah its fun to be creative and and random. a lot of people like that about me.
but i can't get my life in order.
i dunno where i was going with this.
discuss.
God, That sounds familiar...
I started feeling that way when I was much younger and was diagnosed with ADHD 3 years ago. It took me about 6 years to realize this wasn't normal. The turning point for me is when I was driving and noticed a colorful billboard and started looking at it and almost recked my car. My big problem is focus and I get really agitated when I can't get up and do something. I almost never can sit through an entire movie, When I clean my house I have the worse OCD.. I mean I will go back a fix a coat that is hanging up if the tag is out, it is bad. Since I have started adderall it is so much easier, I enjoy life and it has made me a better... calmer person!
hahaha I can relate to that. Every time I tell a story, I never stick to the point. I always end up adding side notes. Same thing happens when i write a paper for school. I always stray off subject and usually my essay's end up being about two topics, instead of one.'normal person' and let me blend in more."
At first read, I thought you said 'bland' in more! Then I thought well if she wants to be like a non-ADDer, 'bland' would be a pretty accurate description.
I've gone through the whole self-doubt thing , still do sometimes -but then who doesn't. But then I'll express my doubts and issues with my true friends; the ones who can keep up with the ebb and flow of an ADD conversation, won't drop me because I'll go months without calling them, don't get embarressed because of what I might say and do, or get tired of me. Those are the ones that I call friends. I will call them, tell them what I'm feeling and ask their advice. Sometimes they'll say, let me think on it, I'll get back to you. But never have they chided me for thinking or acting different. Instead they'll make me see that my differences are what make me truly special.
And I do the same for them. In fact, I drop them notes about how much they make my life better.
Embrace your differentness, your wackiness, your spazzyiness. Sure, take the meds to help you get through the day and manage your life but in the end... The Universe made you different for a reason, even if it's sometimes just to break up the monotony (sp?).
And surround yourself with other whacked out, spazzy people.
Signed
ADD&Proud
well i guess i share so much of my experinces and feelings
well only here
man its tough to be unmedicated adhd.
co workers you think are ok with you actually talking behind your back even to clients.
i ve realized something over the years . some people have to discredit you with your own flaw just make themselves look good.
were sitting ducks to theses sorts of folks.
but ive learned that adhd funtion better as the center of attention.
as long as they can take getting burned
what i mean is when were the flame they are the moths when we hold our candel high they dont see our every emotion and focuss on our ideas ,but when we hold our candle low they see our every expression a and circle around us like a group of critics focusing on our frustration they see in our candel lit faces
ommas39316.3821759259[QUOTE=eliza1]ok i am 24 years old. i'm one of the energetic. think out the box adhd person like ya'll. and i joined this message board b/c i feel pretty alone on this. just like i live in a very complicated world. too many thoughts. always going. always thinking. feel like i can't buckle down and fit in a mold of a serious person. its hard to be around quiet people that do things in order.
does anyone here like feel like you need to overcomplicate tasks to satisfy your brain? like adding extra steps. making fun to-do lists. games of everthing? doodling to keep occupied?
i feel like my brain is so random. i feel sorry for people that have conversations with me. i'm jumping between thoughts. i start a sentence how i feel about something but the next sentence is a new thought about it. and they contradict over lap.
its hard to explain this to other people. adhd gets so frustrating. b/c its like this ALL the time. oh yeah its fun to be creative and and random. a lot of people like that about me.
but i can't get my life in order.
i dunno where i was going with this.
discuss.
[/QUOTE]You are SO NOT ALONE. I can make myself sound somewhat put together in writing, but I pity the people who have to actually have a conversation with me. I cant tell you how often I look into a person's eyes while I am talking to them and see complete and utter CONFUSION on their face. It doesnt do much for my self esteem. At least I am not alone, right?
Oh, I forgot to mention...I have three girls between the ages of 5 and 11 and they are thankfully quite patient with me....crap, I forgot what my point was. (I hate it when that happens).
hmmm
sometimes i think when we are alone and or isolated its easy to start feeling this way.
i used to be able to make friends because i would aimlessly gibber jabber.
and i got used to seeing thier eyes roll like oh please dont start talking over me agian and i would withdraw and usually they would to and would be the end of my friendships
now i just be myself i try to find friends that like to get out
my point is
its sometimes my friends that keep me going and i feel more mentally healthy when im doing things with friends .
i accept that i go through friends quicker as not a lot people like me say all the stuff i speew out and ramble and just keeep relating to the same things they are saying like im tring repeat exactly what they are saying only from my own similair experience.
so after many many years gone by i realize that some friends have more in common with me and that when we share a hobby were passionate about they never seem to mind my enthusiasm , but its not best friendship
rather just people i go do stuff with. intead of just hanging out type of people.
i mean what im talking about is how friendships also guide my self esteem.
i took me a long time to realize i was odd talk too much , change subjects alot, interupt others thought as they speak .
many friends dont like this and stop seeking me and i would get bumed out about it , but i just blow it off now cuase i now realized my dark side shows more than i realized . thin skin irritated easily . in tolerant when i have run through the paces for other the learn what i already know.
after a little maturity i step back and realize that its not all about me .
that sometimes my younger friends have go through experinces that fail even though i try to keep from having to go through it with them.
especially as often as i drop the ball i act like a loser so its easy to blame the ball dropper. but really i lost a friendship cause we were playing the wrong game. it used to be complicated even clueless for me .
no matter howmuch i try to keep my mouth shut ----
like a whale i have to come up for air and like the center of attention evenone looks as someone says thare he blows and i go under,
Ommas -
That was very insightful and helpful. It is so hard to look at ourselves (I really mean me...and whoever happens to agree with me) and see the flaws. It for me is mortifying. Makes me want to cry that I am not as perfect as (1) I want to be and (2) as I honestly thought I was before my embarrassing social actions were ever pointed out to me. But I have found that I get the most validation and warm-fuzzy feelings from the people I consider my best friends who are ones I have known for more than 20 years (just a handful of people) and who not only tolerate my goofiness but see this spazzy aspect of me as a plus and an endearing thing..."Kelli is funny"..."Kelli does things and says things I would never do or say and I get a kick out of it"..."Kelli is the blondest brunette I have ever met and an evening with her is like a trip to the amusement park! She cant even remember her own kids' names!" ~ I think the self consciousness and low self esteem comes from inside or me...I sincerely didnt realize until this year how different I was from other people... I mean, I knew I was a spaz and that was always a given, but when my best friend of 23 years told me she met a lady who was just like me and she happened to mention that she had ADHD and wasnt on medications a light bulb went off in her head and she said, "Kelli! I have finally figured you out! You have ADHD! Go see a doctor ASAP!" All I could do was cry and cry. I still get teary eyed when I think about it. I hate coming face to face with flaws that I wasnt already acutely aware of, you know? This one really snuck up on me. I didnt realize for the last 37 years that I have struggled that I had anything that actually was a medical condition (if you want to call it that). It made me feel horrible, sad, cheated, and embarrassed. Now, however, I am pleased to know that my mind works differently than your average Joe and that makes me special...and in the same breath I must say "special shmeshl - take this away, get me a drug, make me calm, make me shut up, help me work like a 'normal person' and let me blend in more."
...HOW'S THAT FOR A GOOD RAMBLE SESSION! :)
(its nice to feel free to be myself on this message board and not to spend an hour editting my posts!)
That billboard comment was funny. I can totally relate. I watched the movie Stardust last night and it must have been made specifically for Adders. It was so colorful and interesting to my mind. I usually can't sit still during a movie and so I usually don't go and instead wait for the DVD to come out.
Lists? arrrgggg!@
~Bryan
P.S. when I get a chance I will do a review on Stardust on my Blog :)