Has this ever happened to you? | ADHD Information

I certainly have had many problems with getting my son to takes his meds in the morning. He was late for school about 40 times last year (3rd grade). I started waking him up about an hour before regular time and giving him his meds and letting him go back to sleep. He still gave me some difficulty taking the meds, but since he wanted to go back to sleep it wasn't as bad. Once it was time for him to get up again the meds had started working and we had a much easier time getting ready and making it to school on time. I switched to the Daytrana patch in April. That takes at least 3 hrs to see an affect in my son. I was putting the patch on him about 5 am. I told my doctor and she wanted to switch him to a different med - thought it wasn't working. I said my biggest problem was getting him to take the meds orally. I convinced her to prescribe a short acting focalin tablet for the morning. For some reason my son will usually take the small tablets but fights me on the capsules. It was near the end of the school year so I really don't know how effective this will be. He starts school again in about 3 wks.

My son also started seeing an OT this summer mostly because he has problems writing in school. He basically refuses to do it. Rarely writes in his journal. She says he has Sensory Integration Disorder. He is a sensory seeker. This makes him very hyper. Always fidgeting, chewing on things etc. He also is very picky about the clothes he wears. He doesn't like light touch, prefers bear hugs and squeezes.

I started reading the book "The Out of Sync Child," by Carol Kranowitz. It has been very interesting and informative. It describes many different affects of SID. Some children are very hyper, others are very lazy and complain of being to tired to do anything. They can also have great difficulty in transitioning from one activity to another. My library didn't have it. I ordered online. Both Walmart and Amazon carry it.

The reason I mention this is because therapy with the OT is suppose to help alleviate these difficulties. If you have the opportunity read this book and see if it describes your child. If it does you can see an OT that knows about SID. You didn't mention the age of your son, from reading the book I get the impression it is best to start therapy when they are younger. I wish I had started this several years ago. I always thought there was something else besides the ADHD that was affecting my son.

Good Luck
Last year my girl wanted to take a toy into the school and I told her no for it was no place for a big doll. I took her to the flag pole kicking and screaming and when I pulled her aside to talk to her and calm her down she bolted from me and ran towards the street.  I ran as well as a hall monitor we caught her and the monitor looked at me and said I needed to get better control of my child in a snotty voice and dragged my girl away and I left for work crying myself.  I did later report that to the Principal who did not care.  This year a new school.

   One thing I learned is pick and choose your battles and you did fine trying to break your child of the driving habit.

we did that 2 years ago the school we were in had no clue and it appeared didnt wan tto get a clue....i moved 2 hours north and found a awesome school better then i could ever imagine they went out of there way and budget to care form cody!! They are my heaven sent angels :-)

Cody ran from my husband to be at olive garden becasue he wanted pizza instead and at the time BTB was on crutches but managed to jump clear across the parkign lot and caught cody seconds before he hit the highway....he also thought he was in trouble during the carpool pickup one afternoon so he bolted from the teacher on duty, the SPED teacher decided to let cody hang out with her in the afternoon until i came and got him.

GOOD LUCK THIS YEAR IN THE NEW SCHOOL :-) I HOPE YOUR EXPERIENCE IS SO MUCH BETTER :-)

My son does that almost once a week, he refuses to take his meds...so i have to sit their and fight abotu takign the meds...I started giving him the meds before he work up in the morning....go in with the meds, and juice wake him up just enough to take it and then let him go back to sleep our mornigns are much better then they were....by the time he wakes up his meds have kicked in...and he is much easier to do things...eat breakfast, shower, brush teeth, get dress, get to school I am even able to drop him off with the other kids in the morning at the bus stop before i go to work.....before i had to bring him to school and that was a pain :-)

I do the allowance thing and behavior and chores are on the chalk board...they get if everything is doen...on behavior if they have a red mark they pay me one week Cody had to pay me (i give them 6 and then when they misbehave they count out how many dollars they got for red marks) i think it shows them what they could have had...and they see how much they lose from behavior....:-)

coffe girl   so glad you posted     cause youre not alone    actually this quite common.

though i dont have any answers    .  my dd is doing the same behavior

tears , clingy , i want my dad , or i want my mom .   crying for sympathy then really getting out of control.

 

i sypathize with the nurses advice .       some mornings a teacher has to invite her in right away and i have to jump right out the building.

 

 

 

but thats normal   -   then theres the other times when she i violent and manipulitive .  i find that its during times of transition that these behaviors araise and its not just at school.

 

some triggers ive considered in her case.  

grandma and grandpa fighting and divorcing in front of the grand kids with statements that grandpa will never see her again   and hasnt.

 

uncertanty about a new class with new teacher and boring lessons instead of activities .   a change from sleeping with moma to sleeping in her own room.

 

its in my unprofessional opinion that she feels  emotions of vulnerability

 

we all feel vulnerable during times of change  and   when little things in little people make them really vulnerable   its manipulation time.

 

thats where i loose my focus   i cant control how she feels .

if i make feel to safe with me then school is not where she wants be.

she seem fine right up to the point of going into class and then hangs on for dear life.  without teachers help   its real tear jerking experience . especially when some of the moning teachers never even say hi to her.   arrrgh

but i watch the same thing happen to my wife when she leaves for work  ,  breaking momas heart   with real heatfelt whailing that nearly make moma call in .

1 minute with carebears and shes fine  even giddy.

so i see through those crocodile tears in the morning and the hitting and kicking i get is because i havent yet as a parent figured out how to stoppit verbally yet.

one parent spanks the other doesnt    so agian 

she expecting  a spanking when she feels that way and when she doesnt get it she keeps acting out until shes exhausted    or distracted by a teacher.

 

funny i knew nothing about parenting or children for that matter four years ago.

thing is im really not  sure im even right about my opinion  . im just muddling through .   i keep my head up  and i keep trying to give lots of conversation about whats going on at school . so that i help her look forward to going all morning. but crossing the threshold of the classroom it becomes a challenge.

 

i do know that they think giving her food helps her come out of her tantrums,

as usual  teacher have to discover by trial and error themselve too

 

i say its not the candy       its the being invited to a safe place

a quiet corner with candy   and attention  while feelings of vulnerabilty subside hmmm  sometime i wish i could go there too. 

 i work with juvinile delinquents in a mental health facility    sometimes im alone with 24     16 year olds that use rage as a coping skill.   boy do i wish i could get invited to her  corner somtimes.

 

so the school disussed it and determined i was the problem    i wasnt picking her up everyday at the same time sometimes  11 sonetimes 1:30  . so now everyday at exactly 1230 i come through the door  and i feel like its cheers   where everybody knows my name. and off we go for one on one time til 5 when mom comes home  .

so after dealing with this for two years i ve concluded

shell be just fine  because she has parents who love her and teachers that try to help her too.   shes growing emotionally     so try not to complicate  her behaviors with trust issues too     she trusts that i will be there everday at the right time and get daddy's attention after school   but throw a fit   and  its adult television all the rest of the day

ok ok im just going on and on about drool   escalation and how to relax and calm down

not knowing what she worries about is harder to figure out when she's screaming and crying . rather having the hows was your day dear  talk like i have with my spouse.  helping her cope by learning to make friends even if thier not all best friends.

 

so here on this site i sometimes make wild assumptions and am toatally off base asi guess inccurately.

if hes being bullyied at school and draged kicking and screaming into the school.

then there is a slight pattern

attention seeking

positive attention     or negative attention   then further complicated by a behavior to thrash about while being grabbed at.

 

believe it or not i see it five days a week 

speak calmly   saying thier name sofly over and over  inviting a safe listening environment.   so simple expectation that can easily be achieved  .

rock paper scicsors , first one in the building gets to pick dinner or tv.

a special prize from the teacher  for two days without behavior   -   i give the teachers  the prizes  .

 

but when its tantrum time there is nothing to learn for my little dd

its descalation time and sometimes im whats upsetting her , so i have to take a step back and process       is me , the class , the teacher , her worries , hunger . wha?  

its almost always attention.     and the conversation we had or didnt have the day before.  what do bullies want more than anything else        a chain to yank,

find a way to get close enough to the bully that he doent have to yank the chain to get his attention fix  while changing the bully into a peer.  im glad im not in high school any more   but now im in a locked dorm full of people like my own high school bully.  every child is different they all have soft side too.

sometime its hard to stop a cycle of negative attention when there isnt anthing to reward .    so there it is   

dont bully a bully

dont let bullies keep bullying .

search for common ground  and invite the softside of thier human nature get attention without drama.

redirect them to positive peers so that as thier friendships grow thier need to develope negative attention seeking habits  start to be less effectiveways to fit in.

 

sorry this went so astray    good luck

He might just be having a hard time transitioning going back to school.  Until his routine is set he might fight it.  My son doesn't transition well and that is what he gets praised for the most here and at school when he does it well.   I would keep walking the routine if that is what you want to do routinely.  I would also set up a goal oriented reward system like the marble system for helping him work towards getting to school in a calm or calmer state of mind.  Mine has always been rewarded for a good decent week at school and or daycare.  I don't expect perfection, just the effort to be good.  Mostly a trip to the dollar store.  Now he will be getting a couple dollars to save towards things he wants to get himself.  Constant reminder of the reward helps too.   Aaron'smom39314.7174074074

My son today did not want to walk to school. We live one block and a half from the school. Last year, I got in the habit of letting him 'run me over' and telling me that we will 'drive to school' because he was too lazy to walk to school, and if we did walk- he would end up throwing a huge tantrum, then hitting, kicking and screaming the entire way to school towards me and his younger brother til he would get his way the next day- riding in the car.  It was not fun.

So today, it started off even before that- he did not want to take his meds. I had to chase him down and then talk him into taking them, explaining why he needed to take them. He then was so hyper at this point that he wouldn't eat and continued to run all over and just throw everything tearing up the house.  Finally, I was able to talk some sense into him and calm him down, til the car issue.

He went nuts. A huge meltdown ocurred. I stuck to my guns and told him we would walk. At the beginning I carried him half way, with him kicking and screaming, then I sat him down and proceeded to walk away. He caught up with me and we held hands all the way to school and I explained to him that he needed to be respectful to himself, others and etc., and that also, in good weather, walking is a healthy thing to do. On the way to school he kept saying he didn't want to go and wanted to stay home with me. He started to cry once we entered the school ground. He refused to walk into the school- I had to pick him up and carry him in. He then clung to me. A teacher came over to help assist. He started to scream and cry more. He began to scream- "I want to go home". It began to scare all of the other kids. The bell rang, and the teacher and I walked him to the principal. They both pryed him off of me, as he screamed and yelled, and screamed the loudest I've ever heard him scream before- ever. It made my heart just sink. I ran down the hall. Then I had a breakdown. I couldn't take it hearing him kicking the principal and teacher, screaming at them and yelling- "I want my mom. I want to go home". It was the worst time I've ever had with him at school.

They said once they got him to the room, he sat right down in his chair. A teacher whom he feels very comfortable stopped by to check on him. They said she helped him calm down a lot. It made me feel reassured. The teacher e-mailed me later and said he did well this morning. Still, I just feel terrible. I feel like- well, maybe I shouldn't have been so strict.

The school nurse kept telling me afterwards- "You should have left sooner. Next time, leave earlier and this will be prevented." Well, I don't think she understands my child! That won't make a difference!!! That didn't play any role in the situation- we weren't trying to hurry at all. If we were going to be late- so be it. I didn't care. We've been late for school by 20 minutes due to his behvoirs before. Really, that was the least of my concerns. I was just concerned that we wouldn't even make it to school today.

When I see my son tonight, I am going to praise him for the transition he did with the principal and teacher- with the fact that he made it to class and did not have further issues with them. And that he had a better day. Reward him for that. Then just take his radio away for the mishap of negative manners (kicking, hitting, spitting) on the walk to school. It is best that way so he knows I am not mad at him. Just concerned.

I am however upset that he refused to not take his meds. I too, have a medical problem as well. He and I have discussed the importance of taking the meds. We read our ADHD book frequently- and he still does this. It is upsetting. Does this happen to any of you with your children? If so, what do you do? How do you handle it?

Thank you for listening to me and reading this BOOK! :)

Coffeegirl