My son Joe was diagnosed quite young with ADHD and therefore I took his diagnosis with a grain of salt. He's not on any meds, nor have we had any behavior plans, because no one seems to want to help him since he is so young. I've been reading a lot online on things to try, but I feel like I'm groping about in the dark.
Anyway, we got a call from Joe's kindergarten teacher Friday about his behavior. We hadn't heard anything before then, and thought he might be doing alright (he had issues last year in pre-kindergarten so we weren't sure how he'd do this year.) He's been giving her problems EVERY day. She started a behavior journal for him to try to work on one thing at a time (for now it is following directions.) His first day he had 3 happy faces and four frowns. Some examples of problems are:
at snack time he was supposed to finish his snack, clean up, then get out a book. He ended up leaving the classroom, and then shortly thereafter he took apart the classroom pencil sharpener.
At lunch he was being too loud and not sitting still so he got sent to the office. In the office he had a meltdown and threw himself on the floor.
In music the teacher told them to "freeze"-- Joe looked at her and then ran all over the room.
At the end of the day he didn't follow directions at clean-up time and got into trouble.
And supposedly Mondays are his GOOD days... he gets worse as the week goes on, she said over the phone. I dread this week. I am just beside myself.
We are seeing Joe's pediatrician on Friday and I'll be bringing his notebook in to show the doc. The doctor (we saw him in August before school started) last said he didn't know about any diagnosis and since he's only 5 and is in kindergarten, that the school should "be able to redirect Joe" and have no problems.
So I feel like... what do I have to do to get him some help? How are kids at age 5 usually treated? I'm wary of meds so young but I also don't want Joe to always fall short and not succeed. He's SO smart and likes school but I think the pressure of having to "be good" is getting to him. I also don't want to give him a free ride, so to speak, because of any diagnosis.
Any advice or thoughts on how to help a 5 year old? As he's gotten older I think the ADHD diagnosis is valid, but think I'd like another eval to be sure. Thank you for any thoughts or advice.
Laney....I SO understand where you are coming from. My son was diagnosed last Friday, although he was diagnosed by two other dr's prior to this doctor. I wanted a third opinion. I think I just need more convincing. I am hesitant to medicate just like you. Your sons year in K sounds just like mine. EXACTLY. My son is extremely impulsive and it sounds like your boy is as well. I have had 2 teachers, two principals (different schools) and three doctors tell me my son is ADHD. I didn't want to believe it. But it is WHAT IT IS. That was very hard for me to accept. But since I have, I, like you, want to arm my child for success. If that means meds, so be it. We are starting his this weekend. I am scared but I truly believe this is going to help my son. Oh....and my son is 5 as well.
laney, who made the original diagnosis? IMO, you can't just go by what a ped says, you need a proper evaluation. Some people choose a ped neuropsych for this, other go with the psychologist/psychiatrist team. And I agree somewhat with your ped that at this young age, the school should be able to do more to redirect him and you need to make them prove that they are trying and not just trying to force you to make this a medication issue. A proper diagnosis and subsequent recommendations from a medical team to the school will go a long way toward making school life much easier for your son.
So, my advice is to look for a good psychiatrist and ask about the eval process. Don't go with the school psych because I wouldn't trust that they won't have a conflict of interest. Once you begin, the path becomes easier, but never easy. Good luck!!
There are alternatives to meds - go to the alternative meds forum on here. I found to be quite useful. Also, 5 is pretty young to be fully dx - 7 is the more appropriate age. Is there ADHD in your family? It can be hereditary.The origional diagnosis was made by a psychiatrist. We had a bunch of evaluations done at the time because we were not sure what was going on with him (he showed some signs of autism, has speech delays, etc.) He ended up with an ADHD combined type diagnosis, as well as moderate to severe speech delays (articulation, expressive, receptive.)
Thanks for your advice. The school hasn't asked about him getting on medication yet. I thought they were planning an evaluation of him at school but I have yet to hear anything further on that- I am planning on talking to the school after Joe's doctor appointment Friday and seeing what they have to say.
If he has speech delays then he is probably frustrated in school and i would ask for an educational evaluation. He probably needs speech therapy, and that might help with his behavior.
You do have to request the educational eval in writing.
Thanks for your thoughts. Joe has had speech therapy for the last year and a half and it has helped tremendously in terms of his frustration level.
[QUOTE=edbson]
If he has speech delays then he is probably frustrated in school and i would ask for an educational evaluation. He probably needs speech therapy, and that might help with his behavior.
You do have to request the educational eval in writing.
[/QUOTE]I would not get a evaluation at age five. It's too young. The chances of getting an incomplete or inaccurate dx are too high. Some of these evals cost upwards of k and are not covered by insurance, so you need to make it worth your while and get the timing right. Many of these behaviors are normal for a five year old boy. If you wait until age seven you'll be able to get a lot of testing. At this age, minimal testing is available.
This is from an American Academy of Pediatrics policy page:
How can I tell if my child has ADHD?
Your pediatrician will assess whether your child has ADHD
using standard guidelines developed by the American
Academy of Pediatrics. Keep in mind the following:
• These guidelines are for children 6 to 12 years of age. It is
difficult to diagnose ADHD in children who are younger
than this age group.
• The diagnosis is a process that involves several steps. It
requires information about your child’s behavior from you,
your child’s school, and/or other caregivers.
• Your pediatrician also will look for other conditions that
have the same types of symptoms as ADHD. Some children
have ADHD and another (coexisting) condition, e.g., conduct
disorder, depression, anxiety, or a learning disability.
• There is no proven test for ADHD at this time.
Quite frankly, the complaints made me raise my eyebrows. He was suppose to finish his snack, clean up, and then get out a book? This is a three part instruction. My non-ADHD child follows three step instructions maybe 25 percent of the time, if I'm lucky. He was too loud and did not sit still at lunch? He's a five year old boy who just spend three hrs in a classroom. He was sent to the office? Why? He had a meltdown? Well, yea, he just spent three hours learning in a classroom and needed to blow off some steam but instead was told to sit still and be quiet and then was sent to the office for not doing it. The music teacher told him to freeze and he looked at her and then ran all over the room? Well, does he know what freeze means? Did he get it? Did he have any idea what the teacher wanted exactly? Sorry to pick this all apart, but this child appears to be under a microscope and I don't think all of these complaints are legit. Some are clearly overkill. Sure he may have ADHD, but to me this sounds like a blatant strategy to pressure you to medicate. The question is, do you think that he is socially, emotionally, or academically impacted enough to medicate so soon?
The goal to get him to follow instructions and give a few happy faces is probably not going to work. It needs to be really specific and short. For example just pick one specific (not general like follow instructions) behavior. For example, everyday when &&+ comes to class he will put his backpack and sweatshirt on the hook without a reminder. Or everyday after eating lunch &&* will clean up his lunch and put his lunchbox into his backpack with no reminders. Or everytime &&- leaves his seat, he will push his chair in. Then he gets rated on this one thing and earns a reward at home that he really wants. Then he experiences success and buys in. When the one behavior improves, you move on to the next one. This thing about following instructions all day is a set up for failure.
BTW, you could try some alternatives like fish oil and magnesium. Check the alternatives board.
NoTellin39354.5669097222I have to agree - if the signs are there early, trust them. My son showed signs since he began to walk. He's always been impulsive, disobediant, and hyper. We didn't get him on meds until he was 7 and a half. He'd completed k, 1st, and 2nd grades with a LOT of issues. He just turned 8, is on Concerta 27 mg. and is doing well in school. In fact, he is ahead in several areas - bright, but learning disabled. In many ways I wish I'd known that the meds would have helped him the last few years, but I am also thankful that we put it off.I am in the exact same boat here. My son is also 5 and also just started kindy. He was DX'd last winter but I've known since he was 2 that there was something going on. He's extremely impulsive and to a lesser extent hyper. We have worked so hard with behavior plans, he had a social worker for 2 years in preschool, right now he doesnt' have an IEP but he has a social worker and gets group therapy once a week with her.
I am very afraid of meds, every time I convince myself that he needs them and am ready to try them I read so much scary stuff about them. The side effects scare me to death, and he's only FIVE! I am in the process of trying the supplements route, I have an appt. with an endocronologist to get a complete bloodwork up. He does get Fish oil and a good multi every day but neither has helped at all.
I'm sorry I was not much help, I just wanted you to know you're not alone. I wish I could type more but he's in here getting too hyper with the cat.
My son was diagnosed professionally by a pediatric neuropsych. at the age of just shy of 5. We did NOT medicate him immediately.
He suffered in kindergarten and then in first grade. I wish I could go back and do it over!
laney I would go for another psych eval. 5 if young, but he is struggling, at minimum this person guide you. They may not make a solid diagnosis yet either, but it's a starting point. Start some of the behavior plans and supplements on the alternatives board while you work through osme of your questions. Keep educating. Both yourslef and his teachers. I have a child in Kindergarten and one of the things the teachers are teaching ALL children at this age is how to wait their turn, and not blurt things out, and sit for group lessons, etc., etc. The kids who dont learn this after this year is when you start thinking, hey maybe this is not just typical age behaviors. This is why they dont like to diagnose at 5. My daughter has been spoken to aboutnot sittingstill on the rug and for not waiting for free choice (she told me this not the teacher), so I am reinforcing why she needs to follow class rules, etc, etc. This is all stuff the whole class is learning to do. So use this to your advantage to work on the behavior plan and try some dietary supplements, you'll have a benchmark for the end of the year.
Good luck you, you're not alone. Good for you for learning what you can no matter how young.
Holy cow I typed a long response and then my window shut down and it was lost!! I'll try again.
It seems that kindergarten is particularly difficult for ADHD kids as you can see by the numerous posts on this board (I know we're struggling). My son is on meds but is having behavior problems too. I am working with his teacher to implement a behavior plan and she sent me a draft of one yesterday but IMO it needs to be broken down into more achievable areas for him instead of just being on task 75% of an hour (which was her suggestion) - that's too long. I suggested that she add things like - sits on rug quietly during circle time, is nice to friends, waits patiently/quietly for the teacher to help him, raises his hand to speak, etc. I would also recommend that you set up a conference time after you speak with your dr. That way you can discuss the behavior the teacher sees vs what you see at home and work together on a solution. If there is a way you handle a problem at home that works well and she sees that same behavior at school, maybe she can implement that solution so he receives a consistent message that that behavior is not tolerated at home or school. I also talk with my sons teacher daily whether it is a 2 min recap of the day for him or a lengthy email between us. This allows me to know if there is something I need to address with him once we get home or if I should be praising him profusely for being able to maitain his self control and getting his work done on time. Sorry to be so long but this is a subject that is near and dear to my heart.
Check out my new post titled Sensory Integration Dysfunction. Your child's behavior sound earily familiar to ours.[QUOTE=meadog]Check out my new post titled Sensory Integration Dysfunction. Your child's behavior sound earily familiar to ours. [/QUOTE]
Just checked it out, and a couple of other sites... I'm interested. Joe also walks on his toes and makes "mouth noises" constantly... humming, sound effects, sounding like a "human beat box." Thanks for the idea, I'll definitely look into it more.
Constant noise making is definitely an issue as well. I'm certainly not indicating that your child suffers from SID. Simply suggesting that as another item to rule in or out. Good luck.
Hi Laney75,