Advice needed - Just received diagnosis

Hi Mum0

My boy was diagnosed with Auditory Delay, at age 4.  There are many things that cause attention deficit. and the general medical population lables it as ADD and wants to medicate it.  Auditory delay means he has difficulty understanding what is being said in a confusing or noisy environment like a classroom.  As a result, our son was really out of synch with what was going on around him, and became disruptive out of frustration.  It was after he hit someone that we took action and got him tested.

I worked with Dr. Gerry Schwartz, the owner of the Learning Centre in Vancouver, B.C. Canada (she has a website)  to help our son with his learning difficulties.  She taught us that children need to learn to use the brains God gave them, and that it is the parents job to figure out how to support and advocate and fight for them.   She also recommended a communication workbook that our son took to school everyday from Kindergarten until this year.  The teacher reported daily with a smiley, so-so, or a frowny measuring his Focus, Behavior, and Cooperation.  This way we knew on a daily basis how our son was doing, rather than waiting for the meeting your usually get 3x a year.  In this way, things don't get too out of control, and you can stay on top of your child's progress.  Your child also wants to try harder when they are accountable on a daily basis.   As a result, our son became excellent in reading and Math, and his marks when way up.  He also developed a gift in music.  We kept him out of team sports and focussed more on sports such as tennis, skiing, karate, as it is hard for these kids to understand what is going on in a team dynamic. We also put him in the Montessori kindergarten for 3 years from age 3-6 as these kids really benefit from a structured environment.   I have an interest in food allergies and the effects on the brain, because I am affected in this way, and so chose to do my research for our son in this direction, and totally changed his diet, even though I had Psychologist PHD friends who claimed it wouldn't make a difference, it sure did!

He is now 12 years old,  is in one of the best choirs in the Country, has been on the honour role in a private school, is doing better in team sports, and got a scholarship there for choral singing.  We got him in this school when he was in grade 4, as private schools can be more accomodating to kids with special needs, epecially if your child is bright and has special talents.

I have had him on a vitamin called kid3.com (put this into Google for more info)and had all his food allergies figured out by a Naturopath.  He also takes  Effalex (containing EFA's Essential Fatty Acids and Fish oils)Vitamin B complex,vitamins, Vitamin E, an antioxidant, IQ by Albi, from Blaine, Wash, which contains natural stimulants (just started on this one.)  A great book is by Dr Michael Murphy and is called "IS YOUR KID'S BRAIN STARVING'

Dr Murphy has a vitamin company called NATURAL FACTORS which makes a great vitamin smoothie product called "Learning Factors"  it is very helpful.

He is off of foods containing molds (ie cheese) soy, dairy, chocolate, sugar, wheat products, artificial colours, aspartame (lots of this in diet drinks and gum), so called 'natural' flavours,(just another name for MSG, as is hydrolyzed vegetable protein.  He brings junk food and cupcakes home from school, and eats it after dinner occasionally as this food on occasion on a full stomach doesn't do much harm, and helps him to not feel deprived.  At school, you have to be very strict with the teachers, as they hand out all kinds of candy and junk to your kids.  They are only recently getting smart about peanuts as an allergy to this can cause death, but they aren't up to speed about sugar or sugary drinks as many teachers are addicted to this stuff themselves, and don't want to understand the harm it can do to kids that are sensitive to it.

What a difference.  Our son is still very slow in doing his work, and has difficulty writing essays, but he has a 78% average in one of the top schools here in Toronto. 

I have been tempted to put him on drugs, as it takes a lot of time to support our boy in doing his homework,  He takes 3x longer to do everything, but he does it with excellence.  He uses the computer and TV in moderation, as the screen can make his symptoms worse.  Nintendo needs to go in the garbage for these kids. Staring at a flickering tv screen definately makes them worse. A modern computer monitor can be rigged up for tv and games, and is not so over-stimulating as its  screen flicker rate is much higher than tv screens.

But he feels loved and knows who he is, and can sing solos in church in front of 600 people without being a bit nervous.  He may not be the most socially adept or popular kid, but I don't know if drugs would change this either.  There was a boy in his choir who was on Ritalin, and was the most difficult and nasty kid imaginable, and didn't stay for very long.  He had difficulties staying awake, and never ate when the other kids did, unless it was to eat candy.  It was heartbreaking.

Perhaps when my son is older he may use medically prescribed amphetamines (that's what Ritalin, Concerta, etc are.)

But at that time, he will have had his brain mature without chemicals, and can self medicate when he really needs it for university studying, etc to increase his focus abilities.

I am constantly researching and looking for ways to help my son and myself deal with focussing problems.  I became a practicing Architect and have managed with the the help of my Architect husband to have a great business, and raise 2 challenging teenagers.  It hasn't been easy, but I am so greatful for all the support I have been able to find on the internet and from friends and relatives who deal with ADD symptoms.  I am heartened and encouraged by all the parents out there who are sticking to their guns and choosing the non medicated, clean up the diet  route.  I know it may not work for everyone, but it is worth a try.  Anyone who reads this post is please invited to ad other ideas that have worked for you and your family.

Best wishes on your journey,

Marilyn

My son is also 4 and was also recently diagnosed with ADHD.  Both my brothers were hyperactive and were actually in some of the studies for ritalin.  His hyperactivity was causing real issues with daycare. 

We started him on adderall and it worked extremely well for a while.  Then normal 4 year old angry incidents turnd into incidents of rage and were uncontrollable.  We took him off the adderall and the rage went away immediately.  We just tried concerta and saw rage on the first day, so no more stimulants for him.

We go back to the psychiatrist next week to discuss other alternatives.  In the meantime, we've got an appointment to see a counselor and will work that route as well.

It really is a tough decision and one each family needs to make individually.  It depends on how extreme or mild their case is.  In our case, my son can not control his body.  He puts himself into dangerous situations and because the teachers need to be constantly watching him, they cannot watch the other kids enough to ensure their safety.  When we first started him on the adderall, he could control his body for the first time in his life!  He was not a zombie.  He had the choice to misbehave, but for the first time it was a CHOICE! :)  He was actually able to sit during circle time and listen to what the teachers were saying.  He didn't feel like he was always in trouble.  On most days, he got reports of "Two thumbs up".  I was ecstatic for him.

We're in similar situations as far as age and diagnosis.  I'd be happy to continue this conversation with you.

Cindy