My youngest is on focalin and guanfacine (tenex) with risperdal for extra help. The guanfacine and focalin combo is great for her. The guanfacine works on impulsivity, defiance, hyperactivity and is a real good augmentation for the stimulant. It can be given 2 or 3 times a day as needed. We use it without stimulant for summer to help her gain weight. Look up the Tenex threads on the medication board for lots of info.
You should have your son apologize to the other child and he can practice with you. The apology can include that he got angry at being pushed but should not have reacted with more violence and will try to do better next time. The teacher should be present through this.
Hello Everyone,
My son has been doing very well for the most part. On occasion he has a relapse at school. By the way he is in an exceptionally strong and graceful woman's classroom...I couldn't ask for a better kinder teacher. I've been in education for 20 years and have met few like her as she has unconditional love and expertise for children of all backgrounds. Anyway... today was one of his relapses.
When he relapses he becomes very agitated and aggressive. Today a kid pushed him down to the ground and my son in return kicked him. He had difficulty calming down from all of this. His teacher thought she had handled this and then he had something similar happen in an special's class. He is so honest and told me everything. He even told me what he should of down differntly. This teacher did not send him to the office, which I'm greatful for. But I know that this won't always be the case with future teachers. And I know he needs to have reasonable consequences.
I'm wondering if any of you have any suggestions on how to help him with this. He is in play therapy and is with an exceptional therapist. I just want other ideas from parents. Realistic ideas that I can use to help me with helping my son.
Things I am or will be doing already:
check with pedi about relooking at his hypoglycemia(which can be related to agitation etc./the incident occurred after lunch) as his psychiatrist was the first to discover my son had this and we made diet changes/he isn't in my opinion eating as well as he had been...becoming very picky eater talk to psychiatrist and determine if we need to change type of medicine (currently focalin xr 10 mg)/ last visit two months ago we discussed that maybe we need to do a combo of meds to help with impulsive issues read a book that was recommended by my school counselor- one she uses to help her with ad/hd children she works withI just want to do what is best for my baby. He is a bright child and we feel that he is even gifted. The teacher and I discussed this today as well. He is sensitive towards others when they are down and out. He does, however get argumentative with me at night on occasion. He is quick to cuddle up though.
How frequently does he have incidents like this? If it's only occasional I wouldn't worry too much, especially since he was provoked. The teacher should have both children apologize to one another (if she hasn't already).
And maybe you can work with him on ways that he could/should react in situations like these. It's always more difficult when the child's been provoked because you have to keep in mind that the reaction can be reflexive as well as impulsive.
When my youngest was in kindergarten he was very very very very aggressive. He still has problems but not like then. That year a girl hit him during recess and he hit her back. Some of the people at school wanted to suspend him, but the principal didn't do that because she told me that what he did was the first normal thing he had did. All kids will hit, push or kick back. Your teacher handled it great. It is great when you have a teacher that understands and knows what to do with our kids. Apologizing to the other student is the right thing to do. I had my son do that and was also told he isn't suppose to hit girls. Your son just had a hard time calming down, which is normal for our kids. I wouldn't worry to much unless he starts hitting everybody for no apparent reason.
Thanks guys for your responses. It is especially hard for me as I am a teacher myself and I see for myself what many teachers and schools do in these cases.
He has only had 4 incidences this entire year but each incidence involves physical stuff. We've been in school since August. When I look at the entire picture the year has been excellent for him. I just worry about as he gets older. Physical stuff is not tolerated at schools around here.
The only thing I wish I had addressed with his teacher is that I wish they would sit the kids down together to discuss what happened. Because when I hear his side of the story I don't know that the other children are as innocent as they seem. I'd like to see them use some type of management where the students have to address their problems with one another and then formally learn how to apologize with each other for their actions.
You might want to get the Raising a Thinking Child Workbook by Shure. It's a school program for conflict resolution, and this workbook is the parent piece. It begins by teaching the child the vocabulary they need for conflict resolution, and then becomes more targeted in how to resolved conflicts. It is hands on and visual. NoTellin39418.4417361111no tellin...thanks for the suggestion...I will definitely check into it.