Just got report card | ADHD Information

Well I got him to agree to 1 day of the meds to try and he backed out at the last minute yesterday. I will offer today but know the answer already. I guess the report card doesn't matter that much to him and he isn't feeling the pressure yet.

Although your son is younger than mine I understand.  He doesn't feel there are serious enough consequences yet by having a bad report card.  Wait till he gets into Jr. High.  Is there something you can use to motivate him - what about the fear of staying back or summer school? 

Why did he back off suddenly?  I think offering him the meds one day at a time is a good idea.

My son is surprisingly having better reports because he failed the first quarter and he knows if he keeps on that track, he will stay back and not go to high school with his friends.  Now he claims that he is not listening to his new Dr. but isn't it a strange coincidence that he is suddenly doing better? He hasn't had a decent report in 3 years.

So, hang in there. You got to some how try to figure out a way to show your son that lousy report cards have serious consequences.

 

You are right RSWF HE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND THE CONSEQUENCES AND HE OBVIOUSLY DOES NOT YET. We have told him he may be held back but he is stubborn and does not want ANY help at all. I guess you can understand that. He needs to come to terms on his own with this and it just isn't happening yet. He gets very hostile whenever I mention the meds, so he clearly isn't ready to start even though he admits they helped him and did not make him feel bad. Go figure. Well back to the psychologists office for more play therapy, Hopefully he can help.

If he admits the meds helped him and they didn't make him feel bad, why does he not want to take them?

Could it be a control thing?  My son refuses to admit he needs help of any kind.

For example, he as an F in Math and he insists he doesn't need extra help.  We are talking F here - HELLO  - and he always has a rationalization - "Oh, I didn't study," I was sleeping in class, that was when I didn't care, etc.etc."

Hopefully the psychologists can help your son.  For what it's worth - we have the hardest kids to help.  Atleast your son is younger and I'm sure by the time he gets to 8th grade and highschool, he'll be on the right track.

 

 

Spamula,
I got an email from ADDitude magazine last week that listed their top ten articles for November. One is called "ADD Drugs or No Meds" and it includes a little sidebar about including kids in the decision about whether or not to take meds. Don't know if you've seen it or would find it helpful at all.

I think it's really hard for kids to think about long-term consequences of things. Just like with smoking, you can tell kids that it will have a negative impact on their health and may cause cancer and premature death, but to a kid who's 14 or 15, that just seems like a million years away. I don't think it seems real to them.

I hope the play therapy helps.

my daughter didnt care at all about ehr grades or grasp the conseuquences of them in elementary school either. She really still doesnt "get it", but we've bribed her for A's, B's , plus found a decent med and a good program at school helping her achieve this. It isnt helping ehr see that just trying in gym will pass her....nope.....at this point shes failing all due to lack of effort. I want to scream! She wants to get into a certian high school, adn just doesnt get that lack of effort, and wont participate on your transcript is what they look for and dont like! In the big picture, gym probably doesnt matter all that much, but it does impact her "path" right now. So it' not just him, it's so many kids.

Although my son got 3's and 4's in all the academics, as expected he was below grade level on everything else. He says he might try his stims this weekend(I won't hold my breath) he was very upset it was his worst ever. We expected it as the teacher has been keeping us up to date. At least I know it's up there in his little head. He just needs some help with self control mainly and his grades would probably go up to all 4's if he took his meds. Well here we go again.......I hope he does decide to give his meds a chance again.  Now that you have report card maybe you can use it to have him take his meds.  Make a deal with him, ask him if he is willing to take meds till next report card time and if his grades go up you can show him his meds are working.  And then you can discuss if he is willing to keep taking them.  If he wants a break from them how about suggesting he can stop in the summer since there is no school.

I agree with Aaron's mom.

You can look at this as a good thing because now your son sees what not taking the meds does and he can "experiment" and see if there is a difference when he takes them.

I also think it is a good thing that he did well in his academics.

 

spamula, Aarons mom has great suggestions. See if he'll go for it until next report card. Then he'll feel he has some control as there is an ending..........