Wanted to say hello | ADHD Information

I am new to this forum and I just wanted to let you all know how excited I am to become a part of this forum.  I really believe (though only reading on here for 2 days) you all have helped me find some solutions with my son.  My name is Ginger and I am the mother of a 10 year old boy who was diagnosed with ADHD last year.  My husband and I are having a really hard time with his behavior in the evenings and homework time.  Our son went from being an honor roll student for 4 years, to getting C's and D's this year in 5th grade.  Homework time in the evening is a complete nightmare.  I am scared to death that he won't pass the 5th grade.  I can relate to so many things that have been posted on here.  I just wanted to say hello to all of you and let you know that I am so thankful I found this forum.  It is good to know that I am not alone.

welcome, we all learn from each other, nice to have you.Welcome Ginger - I am new also.  My dd Ashley is 6 and was just diagnosed last week, so I am in the "reading everything I can find" stage.  I too was glad to find a place where we all can share our experiences, ask questions, and just learn how to best help our kids.

April

Thanks for the welcome Diane and April!

And WELCOME April!

 

Welcome Ginger

My son is also 10 and in 5th grade. He is on concerta and guanfacine. so far so good.

Do you think that your son may be beginning puberty? I know that once that begins, the meds stop working and we need to start over again

I just wonder why all of a sudden after the 4 years of success, the sudden change.

Are things going ok for him socially?

Thank you so much to everyone for the wonderful posts!  It is so nice to be able to come here and read everyone's post that are dealing with the same situations I am.  Sometimes as a parent I feel so alone, like no one could possibly understand how I feel.  Probably exactly how my son Justice feels, alone and that no one understands .  I am glad to share this board with so many other wonderful parents that are experiencing what I am.  Thank you for the uplifting posts and encouragement and also the advice!  I am thankful that you all care enough to feel comfortable enough to give me advice.  Please know that I am so appreciative!

The school situation is an issue because he goes to a small private Christian school.  There are downfalls to going to a small Christian school with one of them being no special programs for kids with ADHD.  He has been going there for 5 years and he really likes the school.  His teacher this year has been teaching there for 30 years and is very "old school".  From what I gather, she is one who doesn't believe in ADHD.  To her, he is just a time waster and doesn't try.  I don't think she realizes that he has been diagnosed with this illness, which is exactly what it is, and she needs to cut him a little slack.  I am hoping and praying that his teacher next year will be more compassionate.  If not, we will have to look at other avenues.  As of right now we are just sort of riding it out.  I am proud to report that as it stands right now, he has no F's on his report card! 

BTW, my name is Ginger .  My husband calls me Sweets and his name is Todd.  That is where I got my screen name.  Honestly, when choosing that for a screen name it was innocent.

Just to let you know, my son goes to public school and there are no special classes or programs for kids with ADHD either.  You'll get all types of teachers in public school as well.

I think a private christian school sounds great - unless he has an LD that is not being treated, you probably wouldn't receive too many "services" in public school either.  I think the structure and lessons from a private school will work out better in the long run.  

Good luck!

Welcome, I am the mom of a 9 year old boy with ADHD an high Anxiety. Everyday is a challenge here because he is refusing his meds. There is nothing I can do about it and it is hard, we have tried EVERYTHING! So now we just deal. He gets good academic grades so far but the other half of his report card looks like all fails. It is nice to have this board to come to and get help and information.Hi! I'm new, too, but I've been a lurker here for awhile. My dd is 6 and has
ADHD. She has the same problem as your son regarding friends. It is so
hard to see her struggle in that area. Even when I don't post, I feel better
knowing there is so much support on this board.

Just the other day her teacher sent a note that Jillian was going to be
recognized at the character assembly for exemplifying the "caring" pillar for
this month. I was thrilled. Then yesterday her teacher sent a note saying
Jillian was uncooperative in the pm and had a bad day. She is on Metadate
CD 20 mgs, and it helps, mostly. What a roller coaster we are all on!

   

Toddssweets,

I am so glad I responded. My son and your son sound alike. Big hearts, lots to love about them, just immature, impulsive and very hyper. I thank goodness have the meds in place. Without them, life would be a mess for him. I also am fortunate that the grades are great.

But he is still labeled from when he didn't take meds. It breaks my heart and his, but he hangs in and just minds his own business. The school for the most pare is supportive. Is there anyone at his school who could help you and him with the social part? I agree with you, I bet his grades fell because he is sad and lonely. There should be a guidance counselor or social skills counselor who can help with this. Even ask his teacher who is kind in his class and maybe even invite that boy over. The kids who avoid him find out who they are and see if the teacher can help you with those ones as well. There has to be someone who has something in common with your son and can come over and play Legos or video games, etc.

Start with the school! I am glad to hear that you are going back to where he has his social life and school eventually. I would remind him of this so that maybe he can hang in until it happens.

I wish I could have your son come over and play!! My son sure would love to meet him!

Take care!!

Welcome.  Love your white lion.

Oh, well, come March you can move back to the area you belong!  Sometimes it takes an "oops" experience to make you really, really appreciate what you have.  BTDT.
[QUOTE=BETHANN]

Welcome Ginger

My son is also 10 and in 5th grade. He is on concerta and guanfacine. so far so good.

Do you think that your son may be beginning puberty? I know that once that begins, the meds stop working and we need to start over again

I just wonder why all of a sudden after the 4 years of success, the sudden change.

Are things going ok for him socially?

[/QUOTE]

Hi Bethann.  Thanks for the welcome

Wow, I feel really stupid that I am not sure if my son is going through puberty but his meds seem to be working as far as his behavior is concerned.  He started back in August 2006 on Concerta 18 and has now worked his way up to  Concerta 54 as of two weeks ago.  His psych also put him on Ritalin 5mgs to help with the mornings and evening at homework time.  That seems to help.  We just started the quick acting Ritalin last Thursday and it really seems to help with the mornings before the Concerta takes effect and then the evenings during homework time.  I am hoping that with his increase in dosage of the Concerta, his grades will go up.  He says that he is able to focus more in school but only time will tell.

As far as the sudden change after 4 years of good grades, well I believe that is mostly my husband and my fault.  We live in California and wanted a nice, new home so we moved an hour away from work/school/church thinking we could handle commuting.  My husband and I have to be at work at different times so we have to drive separately.  In the rush hour traffic, it takes 1 1/2 hours to get my son to school.  We are very devoted to our church and love the school he is in which is a private school so we don't want to change that part of our life.  Luckily we are renting our home and our lease is up at the end of March so we will be moving back closer to work/school/church.  This has definately taken a toll on all of us, but I believe it has affected our son the most.  My husband and I feel terrible that we made the decision to move in the 1st place but we thought we could handle it.  We have discovered that having a nice big home in a Mayberry like atmosphere just is not worth the long commute and lack of family time.  Our poor son does not get enough sleep, has to get up entirely too early in the morning and we have NO family time during the week.  I could go on and on.   

He has terrible social skills.  It really breaks my heart because he is very immature for his age (which from what I read on here that is normal for an ADHD child) and kids tend to avoid him.  Seeing him being shunned by other children just kills me inside.  He wants so badly to have friends but he can't seem to keep them.  UGH!  It hurts.

 

 

don't beat yourself up over the move. You thought it was good decision and realizing it's not working you are going to do something about it. Meds just dont work perfectly forever and ever................how nice would THAT be . They get older, they get biiger, their responsibility and demands increase, oh and those pesky hormones that come into play, you just have to adjust, and sometimes, adjust and adjust.................sounds to me like you're doing all the right things....................