High School Age Kids w/ADHD | ADHD Information

Has anyone tried www.chadd.org for a support group in your area?

To Twirly1

Regarding the IEP - my son is only 8 and has had an IEP for two years. The IEP has helped immensely for it protects him legally and insures that he gets the accomodations he needs to complete his assignments, classroom work and tests, when necessary.

The best thing about it is that it is a back up for me when meeting with teacher and administrators when dealing with problems that may occur throughout the year. It also gives me a chance to educate the teachers about his particular case. I have been very fortunate so far. I have had caring cooperative teachers who are willing to learn from my experience with what works for him.

In my son's case, one of the accomodations made with the IEP allows him to complete his previous week's homework on the weekend for full credit since he cannot focus well in the evenings when his meds wear off. Sat and Sun are spent completing his homework which is then turned in on Monday. If the teacher would not agree with this, I would have the IEP to back me up.

I realize that my son is only 8 and yours 16, but I look to you and your child for guidance on what to look forward to when my son is a teenager. I often lay awake at night and worry about his future. He is so wonderful and smart and I now I have to start now to give him the tools he will need to succeed and be happy. An IEP is just one of these tools. We get so frustrated and feel hopeless sometimes, it help to use everything at our disposal to help our kids.

God bless you.

Wow, it is good to know we are not alone with this! We have lived day to day for years, 12 to be exact. Is anyone using techniques at home to help with organization and prioritzation with your kids that have been sucessful??

[QUOTE=rswf]

I have a 14 year old - ADD innatentive but in extreme denial - oppositional - always has been. Grades have been failing. He starts fights over everything - can't seem to ever go along with the flow. He refuses to believe he has ADD and thinks ADD is made up. He won't accept help on anything - he is failing math but refuses a tutor - we've paid for tutors in the past and since he doesn't care, it doesn't help. He is failing science - a subject he actually likes.

He has lots of great qualities - smart, funny, musical, artistic, has some great friends, - just can't organize to save his life, gets distracted easily, unless something really interests him (won't admit it) and is generally very moody - always has been.

We have a new psychiatrist who somehow has motivated him to start working and trying. Problem is, he has to keep working to keep the grades up. I told him to just shoot for passing, never mind A's or B's. Just get out of Jr. High.

We deal with tantrums, hyperfocusing and obsessing with current interests - never school work (LOL). Our biggest problem is getting our son to accept help - he won't even consider medication - he always had problems with medications -doesn't even take cold medications or cough medicine - it's a battle to get him to take prescription antibiotics when necessary.

We fear that he will end up staying back and not moving on to highschool . Dr. says we have to shift all the responsibilith to him.

Day to to day issues are frustrating. I walk on eggshells - good day - no tantrums - school okay - weekly progress report good - bad day - anything can set him off.

For me a good morning is when he leaves the house for school without a blow up or anxiety attack ( he won't admit he has anxiety either).

My husband and I live day to day. We have a hard time accepting that this is they way it's going to be, but my son has to decide that he wants the help.

It's hard to deal with teenagers that don't have issues so our days are doubly charged.

I could have said most of this as wellabout my 14yo. What realy stinks right ow is that he tried meds and they helped him and he now refuses them. Says it's his stomach, but I don't know. His stmach is better now that he is off the Vyvanse. But even my previously resistant dh now says, "he was so much bete ron meds!" and we are at wit's end. His grades are seriously slipping and he can't decide if he gives a hoot or not. One day he wil say of course he cares, the next day he just says he doesn't care.

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I have an almost 16 year old ADHD. Very smart. But grades have always been low. He has always gotten his share of D's and F's on report cards. He is on 15mg of Focalin. Anger issues seem to have subsided. He's not doodling nonstop on his pants and notebooks as much. He has always been a poor test taker. The assignments that he doesn't hand in really hurt him.

I am extremely frustrated. My parents never had to micromanage me and my assignments at that age. I don't have the time or grace for it.

He was officially diagnosed just last year. I should get an IEP in place, but don't really understand how that can help him.

His interests are very limited. He has one solid girlfriend and "doesn't like the boys in his grade....they annoy him.....". He's not involved in extracurricular activities. He doesn't have strong goals for the future.

It's very hard. I believe in him. I know that he has areas of genius. He has good character qualities. He is just "different" from his peers......I guess that is OK......I have learned that I can only control so much. There comes a point when I have to "let go" and "let God" with him.

twirly1

We fear that he will end up staying back and not moving on to highschool . Dr. says we have to shift all the responsibilith to him.

Day to to day issues are frustrating. I walk on eggshells - good day - no tantrums - school okay - weekly progress report good - bad day - anything can set him off.

For me a good morning is when he leaves the house for school without a blow up or anxiety attack ( he won't admit he has anxiety either).

My husband and I live day to day. We have a hard time accepting that this is they way it's going to be, but my son has to decide that he wants the help.

It's hard to deal with teenagers that don't have issues so our days are doubly charged.

I am looking to talk with families dealing with high school age kids with ADHD. I have a son who is 17 and I would like to talk to other families dealing with the day to day issues.

My boys were diagnosed and treated with meds at an early age. They never went thru a period of denial, they just decided they no longer wanted to suffer the side effects. When I say "side effects" I mean the appetite suppression, the temporary slow growth and the introversion they felt. Fortunately they had 6 or 7 years while on meds to learn some coping skills and had an acemdemic foundation that helped them to get thru the rest of their public education. It was not always smoothe sailing to say the least. Procratination was always a big problem and still is(they are 22 and 29). But they function well on a daily basis and can prioritize. I still wish they would seek treatment for the conditin as it still exists for both of them, but they are adults and until it becomes an issue in their lives it will remain untreated.

My best suggestion is that you make sure they understand that as they choose not to treat their condition they also take the responsibility for that decision. That if it results in failing classes, being held back in school and losing privileges it is the choice they have made. They may end up agreeing to treatment or they could dig in their heals as many do, then do only enough to get by.

Unfortunately there is not a lot that we can do once they reach this age. A diploma is considered a necessary achievement in our society by most. but it's not the most important. Sometimes we have to reconsider our priorities as parents. Public education has not been designed to showcase children with the difficulties and talents that ours have, in the best possible light.

Maybe find your childs talent and interests and develop those while trying to encourage him to educate himself so that he can use those talents in the future.

Do you mean like a support group? Do any of you attend support groups? Is there such a thing? Well, there should be! (Who wants to start one????)

It seems that there are a lot more ADHD/ADD people these days....or at least people are more aware. I grew up in the 70's. I don't think that ADHD was really known about. Heck, in 2nd grade, I used to invade others' space all of the time and the consequence was to twiddle my thumbs at my desk!

twirly1

rswf,

OMG!!! I have a 14 year old inatentive ADD who acts EXACTLY like yours and THINKS LIKE HIM! Woah......

VERY SMART BOY. But has to "agree with it" or "be interested in it" to do it. He stays up late entertaining himself reading about favorite topics (right now, he can tell you everything you want to know about survival skills or fishing....I'm not kidding.....EVERYTHING.) Yet, he "boycotts" certain classes in school like the reading program. He doesn't like having to choose from a "list of books" to read and be tested on.

He has had a huge ego since 2nd grade when he argued with the teacher about the accuracy of the textbook.

He is a musical and artistic genius, but tends to go toward the sports.

I guess I've come to the fact where I realize that I cannot change him. I encourage him to always stay busy and learning. He loves learning. When he's bored, that's when he gets moody. I think he is just bored in school. I know that he would thrive being homeschooled working at his own pace...learning those things that interest him.

But I'm not organized enough myself to be a good home school mom. :)

twirly1

I wonder...if there existed an Adult ADHD forum in your area, and if high schoolers could attend, if that might prove to be quite beneficial to these young folks, to hear "from one of them" experience and advice....