I can see why you want all the kids in this wonderful school - surely every child deserves exactly that kind of environment! But at the same time, would it be totally out of the question to have only the child who needs it most go there?
I guess what you'd need to weigh is whether it would be more damaging to him to move him to public school or more damaging to the family unit to move only the younger sibs?
I totally understand your concern as we are in the same situation. Our 5 yr old son is currently enrolled in private Catholic school for his Pre-K year. Initially we did this only with the intention of going for just Pre-K since there weren't many other options from Pre-k in our public school system. He was diagnosed ADHD 2 mos into the year and the school has been WONDERFUL as far as trying to accomodate as much as possible for him. We are considering keeping him at this school just for this very reason but yes, tuition costs are high and we could very well use the money elsewhere. My DH & I have discussed what we should do many times and it always comes down to where he is the most comfortable & what is best for him. I'm afraid if we move him to public schools, the teachers/princepals may not be as nurturing & tolerant of the behaviors that he presents. I truly believe that smaller private schools are able to provide a more nurturing environment than a larger public school, which is what most ADHD kids are in need of. I'm not saying that public schools don't provide good environments and extra help, I wouldn't know as I haven't had to deal w/them yet, but I don't think there is as much one on one.
The other factor is that now he has so many friends & people that he knows at this school and that know him, I'm almost scared to move him to a different school where nobody knows him or has grown w/him through this last year & diagnosis. It's a hard decision, good luck!
I think Crunchy Frog's thought about sending just your ADHD child to this private school is a thought. We also have a younger child and will struggle with the same decision eventually, it's a tough one to make.
My son went to kindergarten in a large public school. It was just an awful year. We did not know at the time he was ADHD. We knew that he needed a smaller environment in order to succeed. We bit the bullet and put him into private school in first grade. The class size was small (10 kids) and the school small (80 kids) so he was well supervised and nutured. We still had struggles but we felt more supported. In the middle of his second grade year, he was diagnosed as ADHD and put on meds. He responded extremely well although still had many struggles with friends and social interactions. He is now in third grade, doing ok academically (needs a lot of coaching at home), and is in the final semester of a social skills group that has been helping a lot. We feel good about his progress but I hold my breath every day that he doesn't have an incident with friends. The school is great about supporting us with his issues. Because it is a private school, we do not have an IEP but they work with us on any minor accomodations we may need for him (more time on tests, not requiring cursive, split grading on content and neatness). If he needed significant accomodations, I don't think they would be able to help us.
All that said, the school is not cheap and we also sent our daughter there so they would both be at the same school. We have our third child fast approaching the age he also will go to the school and we are gasping at the total tuition cost per year. We love the school and are very good friends with several families that also attend the school.
We are considering switching back to public school due to costs. As you can see, we believe our son has benefitted tremendously in his current environment. We are concerned how a switch from this small, nuturing environment to a large public school may effect our son.
Has anyone else faced such a decision? How did you go about it? Do you think that the move would be detrimental? Any thoughts or feedback would be appreciated.
haveyou talked to the school about help financially for tuition? what about ifyou helped there would they give you a discoutn? I know at ours ifyou are an aide tutiion can be 1/2 off or free. Also we have help for those who cannot afford it. Just thoughts.We have our ds in a private school and love the nurturing environment. I