TANDRUMS! | ADHD Information

My four year old daughter was recently diagnosed with ADHD although she is not (yet) on meds, she will likely go on meds within the next year or so.  Since she's so young, I'm trying to control her behavior with behavior modification for the ime being (praise/ignore/timeouts), however, from time to time she gets herself worked up to a frenzy.  It is generally over a control issue (she wants to do something, I say no.....even when the issue itself is no longer on the table, she chooses something else to corner me on when she's all worked up).

Although I know trandrums are supposed to be "ignored", I generally comfort her after about a half hour so she can get some sleep or we can get some peace in the house.  I don't want to "reward" this behavior but she really gets out of control and I just want her to calm down.  Of course, I don't give her any of the things she asked for during her performance.

Any thoughts had to handle these "episodes"....I am drained!

Joan

 

 

 

 

 

my daughter, now 6 (not diagnosed with anything), had some pretty good tantrums. I started to send her immediately to her room when she acted this way and we did not talk (AT ALL) until she was calm. I of course had already taughter some ways to cal herself, counting, deep breathing....etc., etc. I know, I know mid tantrum they're not going to take 2 or 3 deep breaths and be on their merry way, BUT they key was getting rid of the control issue. No fight, no control debate. So there were days she literally spent half the day in hre room. Because sh'ed come out say she was calm, and then go ogg wihtin minutes (because she was never calm from the first time), so I'd walk her back to her room (no talking) and put her back. EVERY time she did calm down we discussed how she could've handled it differently. ANY, and EVERY tiem she did not flip out in a situation she normally would, I would reward her. It was a lot fo work, but worth every second as now she is 6, rarely tantrums and when she does she gets put in her room and is calm within minutes. She knows I wont deal with ther when she's irrational, maturity does wonders. IMO 4 is THE worst, it'll get better.Tantrums are normal and like you after awhile I usually try to comfort as well depending on the situation is it a tantrum (ignore) or meltdown (hug) to help her gain some control back.  A word of comfort it does get better with age for the tantrums do happen less still occur but a lot less.  Hang in there. I did the same things as Diane mentioned, or I just walked away. When they realize that you are not being bothered by their tantrums they usually stop. Ironically my NON adhd DD had more tantrums at 4 than my youngest who does have adhd. 4 is just a tough age, and not my favorite.....if they could just skip 4. speaking of tantrums (or more like a meltdown).. we just switched dd to patch from metadate about three weeks ago. she had her first meltdown in many monthes tonight when we told her she couldn't eat while watching tv- some we only do as a family only on sunday evenings- we call it a living room buffet--
after about five minutes of sobbing and crying away from table with her mother, she came back and ate dinner with us  and was in good spirits the rest of the evening. she would have meltdowns like this when much younger but we haven't seen this fir many monthes and not nearly as often as it was say three to four years ago or more. hope it's not from med change.