Has my daughter got ADHD? | ADHD Information

Can anyone please advise me?

I have been having problem with my daughter since she was about 6. she suffered from absences and was put on medication. That was the beginning, since the age of 10/11 she has been suffering at school and at home with forgetfullness, easily distracted, over reaction to simple requests and I mean violent over reaction, talking and saying inappropriate things at inappropriate times and just recently I've found out she is self harming.

This is tearing my wife and I apart and I seem to be the only person that acknowledges she may have an issue. She has not lived with us for about 8 weeks now as my father in law tried to help by taking her down to his house to give everyone some space. Admittidly things got better for my daughter as she was getting everything she wanted but the important thing was that she was going to school and her stress levels seem to decline but just recently we received a knock back when the school informed us that she had in fact been truant from school. Even my father in law was beggining to see tha bad in her.

Then my wife and I discussed the matter and decided it was time to start intergratting her back in to the family household. This had a really bad effect and again caused clashes between my daughter and myself, my wife, father in law and myself which is a change as he was of the same opinion as me until last night.

My wife and father in law think that it is me that has the problem but please believe me it is simply because I'm concerned for her safety.

It is that bad for me now that as I write this message I am considering 2 options, leaving my family and commiting suicide. I am desperate for some help and advise. All child services offered us was a "survive you teenager" and my daughter "HYPE". My wife won't attend.

What do I do?

Where do I go for help?

First you should seek counseling for yourself. You need to be able to talk out your feelings and reactions with some one outside your family. Second whether or not your daughter has ADHD, something's going on. I think she also needs counseling (IMO family counseling would be great). Start with a psychiatrist, have them evaluate her and try to tease out what's causing her "issues". Everything she's doing could be the result of a lot of things. The one clear things is, you all need counseling, but for starters, get it for yourself and your daughter.I agree with Diane. Get counseling asap. Even if your wife doesn't want to
go, you and your daughter need to go. Keep us posted. We all care. Yes, I agree with the above. Please get help for yourself. Even though your family is going through very hard times, your life has value. You might try calling a suicide help line and they may be able to advise you on where else to go for help.

When you say your daughter suffered from absences, are you talking about absence seizures?? Is she still taking medication for this? I think it would be a very good idea to immediately contact the medical doctor who is treating her and let him/her know about the problems she is having. It could have a lot to do with the seizures and/or the medication.

Maybe it would be best for your daughter to stay with your father-in-law, at least temporarily, until your all are able to get the situation stabilized.

Don't give up. Keep trying to find help until you get what you need. I think if you are able to take even a small step or two in a positive direction, everything will look much better for you and your family.

Good luck and keep us posted.
wonderful news. You are both on the road to a more manageable life and better relationship.

I am sooo glad you were able to speak with someone to help give you direction! Sometimes, something as simple as that is all we need.. and a shoulder to keep us going. The process isnt easy, but just getting a diagnosis to explain why she is the way she is and that she is not doing it on purpose is a great relief. (at least it was for me when my son was diagnosed with ADHD - combo type)

Now that you found us, please stay! Everyone here is so helpful, encouraging, and great listeners! We might not have all the answers for you, but we are here for you!

Your life and your families life and well being is so worth the effort to seek medical help and therapy. It's worth it .. so use it! And, it's so worth it to stay around so you can help your daughter and watch her get better and better!

That's wonderful that you are going to seek help. Just know that you are trying to do the best for her. Even if your wife and father in law don't agree, you still have to do what you think is best for yourself and your child. Good for you on doing that. We are always here. Keep us posted. Lots of hugs.

Glad you found a place to start getting help. Definitely get help for yourself too. It is very stressful dealing with these issues with our children and one way to help your DD is to make sure you take care of yourself. She needs you.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Thankyou for all of your words of encouragement.....today i spoke to a community liason police officer. He has suggested to me by extended family. He was great and has also suggested that I seek medical advise for myself and my daughter.

I must admit that this morning when i joined this group I was at the lowest point of my life ever. My wife and father in law just won't accept that I may be on the right tracks.

I care deeply for my daughter and I know something is wrong.......my job is to ensure she grows in to an adult safely and to be around to pick up the pieces when her heart is broken for the first time.

Anyway I have an appointment with the family doctor on Tuesday so I will let you all know what was said.

Thanks again to you all.

I'm so glad to learn that you found someone helpful to talk to and that you got a doctor's appointment set up!
Keep moving forward and let us know how things are going.

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Good I am glad you found some help. As inspired said in the first post, making even a small step in the positive direction will put things into a better persepective. Good luck and keep us posted. She's lucky to have you.

God bless you and know that everyone here is willing to pick up the pieces when things get too much for us! You are part of the 'family' now.

I am glad you were able to go to get help for your daughter and self. One suggestion for your doctor's visit: it is going to be stressful so you might want to start writing down your observations and questions now to bring with you.

What a stroke of luck - my GP has connections close to home that help people, more specifically 14 - 19 year olds with ADHD

She seems to be of an opinion that she has O.D.D, Oppositional Defiant Disorder. This is news to me......I wasn't aware there was "sub headings" to ADHD. Another positive is that my daughter came with me.

She has a referal next Monday.

I am so glad that I joined this forum on Monday morning......God knows what I would have done without you all....THANK YOU