bullied by the class clown | ADHD Information

I am so sorry for what you are going through.  I have a 9 year old who kids make fun of him because he has a hard time in school. I have spoken to his teacher and she does not tolerate it. She is especially watching out for him.  What if you went and spoke to the teacher and tell her to just watch and not tell your son. Explain that he does not want it to get worse. also I would request they not be in the same class I did that last year and the teacher told me she did not blame me. Then she let the flood gate spill and told me alot of what she observed with that boy.

Ann

Definitely talk with the teacher and tell her that your son didn't want you to go to her.  Ask her to not let on that you had talked.  Ask her to quietly separate the boys in the class and at lunchtime or wherever the abuses are taking place.  Tell her about the "Just-kidding" nonsense because that is a classic way to bully without taking responsibility or getting the attention of the teacher.  Ughhh, I hate these "sneaky popular" kids that work under the radar of adults.  Definitely intervene so that your son isn't further cast in the role of everyone's punching bag.   After reading all of the posts I need to take a stand. My son has come to
me for help-whether he wants to admit it or not. He is not able to handle
the situation without some help. I am going to speak to the teacher
tomorrow. I do have a really good relationship with her.

I decided to move my son to another school next year for middle school-
for many reasons-one being to get some space between him and the
bully. When I told my friend -she decided to move her son too!!! can you
believe it!! I may go in and tell the new principal me dilema-I grew up
with him so I feel comfortable asking him how he would handle this
situation and if they could be separated next year. uggh.

thank you everyone for great advice-I always turn to the boards when I
have an issue and I always get great advice from people who have been
there!!My 10 year-old-son is being picked on by the class clown-you know the
athletic, good-looking, alpha male in the class is tripping him to make
the class laugh. kicking him in the shin, making comments about him to
make the other kids laugh. Giving him flat tires on his shoes when they
are walking in line. But then the boy says he's "just joking" so it seems
like he's not really putting him down. I am so frustrated because he's a
smart bully, making it look like they are friends around the adults. And in
fact they have grown up around each other because his mother is a really
good friend of mine. I have tried to talk about it to her but she sees my
son as the problem(my son is not social adept to say the least). I have
worked with my son from his end -telling him just to stay away from the
boy-he says he does. But it continues to happen. My son does not want
me to go to the teacher as he says that will create more of a problem. I
am thinking about talking to the bully and telling him to stop. Any
suggestions??whether he's "joking" or not, he' still bullying him. At minimum, I'd make sure they are not in the same class next year. If you're son REALLY doesnt want you to go to the teacher.

I cannot believe that your "friend" wouldn't want to help you and your child. Unfortunately, there are way too many parents out there who choose to believe that their child is a Saint and not capable of being a bully or problem. That is sad. Just because your son doesn't make friends well or acts shy shouldn't be an excuse for her son to run all over your child and make fun of him. It makes you want to go and whoop somebody's butt, doesn't it?

You are between a rock and a hard place. I know that you don't want to lose your friendship, but it's time to nip this in the bud. I would hope that your sons teacher wouldn't make a huge issue out of this. She should be made aware of the problem, and she can pay more attention to what is going on.

I would seriously question just how good a friend you have there. I don't envy you a bit. I hope and pray that things will improve for your little one.

"Our children are precious in His sight"

If this woman is really a friend, then she'll understand and respect your concerns. If she doesn't respect your feelings, then she's not a very good friend.

It's my guess that the school has a no-bullying policy. Go to the principal and voice your concerns. What the other boy is doing is bullying and it must stop now.

It's possible that your son is doing some things wrong too (not keeping his hands to himself, etc.). But, that doesn't matter in this case. The other boy needs to learn to keep to himself and stop touching others when they have told him not to. It's time for your son to express his boundaries and you should help.

We went through teasing at school last year. The principal and special ed teacher sat discussed with the kids repsect for each other and what constidutes bullying and what the consequences were. This was presented as any other training and was linked to the reward system the class and school has rather than any incident or problem. They also made sure my daughter knew to go to them and they would handle things without exposing that she had told.

Because the regular classroom teacher had been unresponsive, I took in the district policies on bullying and information on preventing it (downloaded from the web) for the discussion with the principal. This made sure she knew I was serious and was unhappy with the regular teacher's response.

This worked well and stopped the problems.

The world has gone insane with regards to bullying in school.

Why should your son have to leave the school?  The Bully should be "kicked out" AGGG this makes me so angry.

In my day - the bullies were punished and we were allowed to fight back.  All the bully needed was a swift kick back.

Now, in today's PC climate - the kids being bullied are made to feel that if they fight back they will be punished.  The bullies are actually seen as victims. The victims are scared to death to tell or fight back because they will get in trouble - insane but true.

I know this first hand - my son would complain about kids picking on him, and I"d say, "fight Back" Hit him back" he started it.  My son would say, "No mom, you don't understand, I'll get in trouble" I'd say, "how, you didn't start it? but he'd insist.

Recently, my 7 year old niece was being bullied by a gal in her kindergarten class. Would you believe that the teacher arranged a conference with the guidance councelor for my niece to be more assertive!!

Oh, the teacher wouldn't talk to the bully girl to tell her to stop!  So, long story short, they set up this "meeting with my niece and the bully girl.  My sister put up with the crap. I told my sister to insist that the school talk to the bully girl's parents and tell her to stop.

Well, I also told my sister to tell my niece to hit back and not to worry that she would get in trouble.  Also, a good friend of my sister's also agreed with me - my niece should not be afraid to hit back. All the bully needs to know is that she will be smacked back.

Oh no - my sister won't do that - no violence.  It is ridiculous - in this insane PC world - everyone is afraid to tell the Bully to stop - don't want to hurt their self esteme - so they teach them "I" messages"

Tell the bully, "I don't like it when I am bullied."  This is supposed to make the bully stop and realize his "actions are hurtful"  DUHHH That is why he is a bully