My dd tempers seems to be getting worse the older she gets.
Obviously they pick up bad language as there is enough on TV , in the street and school playground.She has real bad temper outburts when med have worn off.
I get the likes of "Im going to Fing kill you" etc.Im gouing to punch kick etc.we hget spat at etc .
Its so hurtful from a 7 year old any advice.
She has no addatives , meds are fine and doc knows .Its more how do people parents and deal with childrenm when they are like this.She is uncrontrolable has no other underlying probs it's her ADHD.
Does she see a psychiatrist for meds? Is the behavior worse as meds are leaving her system like it's rebound?
Behavior modification can help with this. Do not engage her when she behaves this way. Have a place (maybe her room) and when she "starts" tell her that is not accpetable or apporpriate behavior so she needs to be alone until she can be polite and is ready to be around others. You must follow through though. EVERY time she behaves this way she is in ther until shes ready to not be that way. 7 year olds want to run the house, she needs to know you're in charge, but do not fight with her, if you do she wins. Once she is calm, she will eventually get calm, then discuss how she could have handled the situation appropriately, and when she does.........praise her excessively.
Does she see a therapist. May be a good idea to help her with techniques to handle some of this anger.
I have no real advice to offer, but I do deal with outbursts also. Our child is five, and you never know what will set him off. Putting too much milk in the cereal or not enough, not having any waffles. You get the idea. He yells at us that he doesn't like us; used to be I hate you, so I guess we're going in the right direction. His pediatric pysch. out him on Risperdal (he also has ODD), and that has helped some. He used to kick and scream and would absolutely destroy a room before medicating him.
I hope that things will improve for your family. Just know that there are others of us out here that understand.
She does see a therapist and phychiatrist its starts after her meds have worn off but not immediatly after.
I have tried sending her to her room unless i physically drag her she wont go .I get verbal abuse also she will then destroy her room.
I have physically dragged my daughter, completely ignoring whatever she says. She has also trashed her toom. Once she is calm, she HAS to then clean it up. It's a lot of work, but it can help.
What suggestions do her her therapist and psychiatrist have?
Basically accept the way she is.
Its is not every day she has the real bad tantrums.
Its usually on a morning before meds where she is terrible mainly as she hates school.Then on a night she is bad tempered when her meds have worn off .A couple of times a week she is unbarable.
If i miss her meds( very very few times have i ever not give her medication) she is the same .
I think you need to look for her triggers and avoid them if at all possible. I think children on stims need to be parented differently in some ways. The stims are causing these rebound issues. You mentioned that "even when she is off the stims" but then said you have rarely missed a day. The rebound from stims last for a long time.
Doctors will say the stim is out of the body in a day but that is definitely not the case. The effects can last WEEKS when you stops stims. I know first hand and have heard many stories from other parents that there is abnormal (goofy, extra hyper, tantrums, etc.) behavior for a long time after stopping stims. So because these behaviors are happening after you think the stims have worn off doesn't mean it is not due to the meds.
Many here have said they ignore their child when having a tantrum. That actually was worse for my son. He kept going and going. A child not on meds may calm down, but some children on stims CANT. I found that holding my son tightly and trying to calm him worked much better and helped avoid alot of destruction in my home.
In public places I just tried my darndest to prevent the tantrum and if it happened I left immediately whereever I was.
My son had a tantrum the other day, and then actually appologized for having a "melt down." I was just about in shock. I truly didn't think he was aware of himself. All I did was let him scream himself out. And he felt much better after it was over, although he was embarrassed.
Sending my son to his room doesn't work - he basically freaks out. I'm lucky in that he doesn't throw things. I stayed right with him, and he eventually tirec himself out to the point that it stopped.
I don't know if this will help at all. I think I've gotten used to the tantrums, and since I'm calm, he can calm himself down faster.
Good luck!
Could it have anything to do with her not eating enough? When my son was on stims I found that he had a much easier rebound (less moodiness) if he had alot of food available to him. I think it had to do with blood sugar.
He basically was allowed to eat nonstop when he got home. I didn't make him wait until dinner. That helped with him, you may want to see if its at all related to food intake.
Throughout the 4 1/2 years I have been working with the doctors about Jon I have found so much research that states the behaviors you are seeing may be rebound. To illustrate: stimulants are part of the amphetamine drug group: ritalin is the closest chemically- it acts just about the same as street meth does; adderall is a chemical bond or two away, and focalin is another chemical bond or so away. When addicts take meth and they are coming down they become extremely explosive and unpredictable. I have spoken with people that took meth and they said that they feel their whole body 'clenching' or becoming rigid.
I have since learned that clonidine with stimulants can damage the heart. So ekg's are a wise precaution. More psychiatrists are now using resperidal to control the anger in the afternoons. Some psychiatrists even suggest benedryl to help.
Please check with your child's doctor and tell him/her about the temper tantrums in the afternoon. If your doctor suggests other meds for the afternoon, you will know to ask for needed ekg's and/or lab work.
There is NO WAY your daughter should be allowed to threaten anyone!! If she does this in school or even in your neighborhood when she is older she can have law enforcement called on her and then you will have another problem altogether. I know first hand that when my son was dx bipolar and put on depakote and Zoloft he went absolutely nuts! he is still being stabilized in the hospital and he is off all this medication and they said his dx was incorrect. My husband is a state trooper and we know how serious a police report on a child can be. Thank goodness we did not have to deal with this with our son.
Please call your doctor asap.
Randy
My doctors knows all about it.
She has these tantrums if she is not on meds and if meds are worn off.
All i want to know is how other parents handle these tantrums.
When Jon has tantrums I put him in his bedroom. He also has destroyed it several times and then he cleans it when he is calm as best he can. I am an advocate of those pop-up laundry baskets. After Jon is calm I hand him a basket and he gathers everything and puts it in a basket or two.
I have also removed all the dangerous cleaners from the bathroom and have sent Jon there for time out. I don't engage in arguing, discussing or explaining. It is one of the times when 'silence is golden'. I explained to him when he was calm one morning that when he had a tantrum I would put him in time out and NOT talk to him until his tantrum stopped.
Hope this is more help to you than the above reply I posted.
[QUOTE=randyjim]When Jon has tantrums I put him in his bedroom. He also has destroyed it several times and then he cleans it when he is calm as best he can. I am an advocate of those pop-up laundry baskets. After Jon is calm I hand him a basket and he gathers everything and puts it in a basket or two.
I have also removed all the dangerous cleaners from the bathroom and have sent Jon there for time out. I don't engage in arguing, discussing or explaining. It is one of the times when 'silence is golden'. I explained to him when he was calm one morning that when he had a tantrum I would put him in time out and NOT talk to him until his tantrum stopped.
Hope this is more help to you than the above reply I posted.
[/QUOTE]
Thanks its how to handle her.I know shouting doesnt help.Afterwards shes fine says sorry etc wont do it again etc.
How do you handle the situation in Public places??
Your 7 year old says "I'm going to f-ing kill you" and your therapist says, just accept it? Does your gut instinct tell you that you shouldn't accept this? If so, tell the therapist or try a new therapist.
I think even though she is decent on the meds, she still needs to learn coping skills and anger mngmt...
KidsInSpace39559.2627430556
I dont go out that often but it's not fair on my dd nor her sister if they dont go out basically because rude people cant accept them for the way my dd is.
Oh my goodness!!! Public places!!! Well, for one, I am now not taking any of my children shopping. I leave them with my husband and go myself. When we have to go somewhere, I make sure I bring FOOD- those ready to eat baby carrots, raw snap peas, pretzel sticks etc. For every 5 minutes they behave they can take one or two. But, I limit the time out in the stores. In the car, I let them use a gameboy or leapster. It really works for us. [QUOTE=Fountainpen]
My dd tempers seems to be getting worse the older she gets.
Obviously they pick up bad language as there is enough on TV , in the street and school playground.She has real bad temper outburts when med have worn off.
I get the likes of "Im going to Fing kill you" etc.Im gouing to punch kick etc.we hget spat at etc .
Its so hurtful from a 7 year old any advice.
She has no addatives , meds are fine and doc knows .Its more how do people parents and deal with childrenm when they are like this.She is uncrontrolable has no other underlying probs it's her ADHD.
[/QUOTE]