counting my blessings | ADHD Information
I shouldn't go poking around on the internet. I took a peek at MSNBC's week in pictures - I recommend you don't look at them. They have a picture of a young boy who lost his leg in the earthquake in China. I can't stop shaking. It's so awful. I recently had my own son in the OR, but it was nothing like that. You know, we've had a horrible time dealing with the school this year, but at least it didn't collapse on him. I think I'm making his ADHD out to be harder to deal with than it is, because it's nothing compared to that. It's not going to suddenly kill him without warning. I mourn for those families who were not lucky enough to have their children live long enough to get their ADHD diagnosed.
Sorry for such a downer post, but sometimes perspective just nails you.
[QUOTE=Corrina]Sorry for such a downer post, but sometimes perspective just nails you.[/QUOTE]
Lots of times, I need to remind myself to put things in perspective, including my son's struggles with ADHD and his teenage rebellion. Good post. Your points are well taken.
< =text/>_popupControl(); I agree. The story about that poor child who "drowned" after inhaling some water, then walking home and going to bed just kills me. Repeating myself a dozen times doesn't sound so bad right now. I ALWAYS try to think this way, actually. When my son is complaining about something minor, (usually -- I want ___ and everyone else has one but me!) I tell him that at least he has a roof over his head, isn't being used as labor in the fields like the children in Mexico, nor is he a sex slave like those children they show in parts of Asia that rich scumbags from the west go to have sex with them. It goes back to if you hit the geography lottery (living in the "west") no matter how badly you have got it---there is always someone in worse off shoes. Be grateful. (Or at least feel less bad for a bit.) Yme!39605.4150578704We've got it even better - we live in Maine - no hurricanes, no tornadoes, no blistering heat, no poisonous spiders or snakes, no earthquakes, no big city problems, no west nile virus or malaria, no terrorist attacks. I'll take snow over those things any day of the week.OMG We live in Maine too and I am ALWAYS telling that to my husband and kids. We are lucky here. Snow is EASY! And...your post wasn't a "downer" post. It's good to be reminded. Where do you live? We're in Windham.Saint Agatha and work in Madawaska which is the most Northeastern town in the US. (You probably know that but alot of Mainer's don't even know where we are.)I have relatives in Houlton, and that's about as far up as I've been. You're further away from me than NYC. That's a bit away!
Yeah we are still a two huor drive north from Houlton.I think we all get overwhelmed because OUR lives are the only ones we LIVE. So, it's hard to remain in that state of calm when your ds is off of meds for the whole summer and suddenly he screams out a shriek... But in the grand scheme of things, we are blessed.
I know there are some reading this who think "YOU might have it that good, but my life is hell..." and I think to keep it respectable we must acknowledge those situations. There are several levels of hell on earth, you just have to figure out if you're one of the top layers or one of those closer to the bottom, and I think it's all about perspective. My cousin has an 18 month old just diagnosed with autism and he's already banging his head in the walls...she feels like she's in hell. But let her get on her feet, pray, and gain some education on autism and check in later...I don't dismiss anyone's hardships but rather grasp the ones that I don't have to see my children suffer with!! SO, for those of you who are reading this and don't get our light-heartedness right now, hang in there...your 'blessed' feelings are coming.
and to those of us who already feel blessed, I pray we can continue to find ourselves in this seat. I hope we remain there with our children..."Too blessed to be stressed..." I like that saying, I just have to remind myself!
I agree with counting your blessings every day. Sometimes I start feeling so sorry for myself (I have two boys with ADHD and feel a little overwhelmed some days) and forget that life isn't easy for my boys either. And our lives are soooo much better than those of many other people. When it happens I start chanting in my head "I am blessed, not a martyr" or something like that until I regain the proper perspective.
Corrina - I love your attitude. I have to remember that when my son is calling me profanities.
You are right - ADHD makes our kids special - my kid is a challenge but he is a gifted trumpet player - the highschool band director is excited that he is going to 9th grade this year. He has a sense of humor, he is smart, he is artistic and sensitive.
My son is an individual and will always do what he wants to do instead of what others want him to do. The trick is to teach him when to conform and when to be independent.
Oh, believe me, I hear more than my share of "I hate you Mommy." But if I don't react, more often than not after a couple of minutes I'll get an apology. I just try not to take it personally. I'll let his teachers keep grudges. I've seen enough of my kid to know that when a bad spot hits I've just got to hang on a little bit more for the pendulum to swing back and I'll have my little sweetheart again.I want the challenges though. Do you have any idea how boring my son would be without all his quirks? I wouldn't change him for the world. And he's not the challenge, not really. It's dealing with everyone else that's the challenge. Big deal, he doesn't keep his room neat. Big deal, he loses 10 pairs of mittens a year. It's not like I can't replace them. ADHD is more of an annoyance than a challenge. It's manageable. So I should chill out about it.Maybe I should send you the left over mittens that I can't match up any more. maybe you can make a set. Next year I am sewing them to his jacket!Well, you know, I LOVE This post!! Can anyone help me with what to do about the recycling my child does with his 'surprises' he finds in the trash!! It's like a trip to Wal Mart for him!!
I agree with what you're saying. I do know of a child who is the child who is quiet when told to be, who doesn't talk unless spoken to, who doesn't pick fights or get excitable...YUCK!! I'll take my giggling, energetic child any day and yes, there are challenges that come with it-but they are doable!!
Some times I feel like the one who needs to be in 'time-out' for over-reacting. Our ds is a forgiver like no other for us, we are pretty fortunate!!
I agree with your post, although, I don't live in Maine! I am constantly reminded how BLESSED my family is. My children have the ability to see and hear and laugh and walk and run and play...They can eat on their own, they can do so much that we take for granted!! They are clear of leukemia, bad hearts, disfiguring and truly disabling diseases...
This is NOT a downer post, it's a REMINDER post...a reminder to count our blessings and (whether your religious or not, allow me to be) thank GOD for them!! I pray all the time for God to continuing to bless my boys...and if that bullet ever does hit my family-allow me to remember these years we've been so blessed to have. There are parents who felt blessed to have a child with a bad heart and leukemia, too, because now they just want that child back. Every moment with our children is a gift. We are not guaranteed one more with them...
Can we take some of the tics, tantrums, immaturity??YES!! Suddenly, it instead becomes their laughter and their joy in life and their creativity I think of most...instead of the 'issues'...
Thanks for the reminder today!! It is much appreciated!
Yes, we need to be able to step back and look at the bigger picture and count our blessings.
Our children are challenging yet they are special and have their own unique qualities that make them loveable.
You originally thought you were making too much of the ADD thing? Not really - your child still had ADD and all the challenges that go along with it.