You are doing a great job!!
As parents of challenging kids, we have to be great parents just to survive. What works one day doesn't always work the next. I like everyone here is constantly evaluating and changing what I do.
Many many years ago I saw a teacher training video on ADHD and behaviour and it showed a teacher in front of a class with ADHD kids. In it the teacher had some sort of vibrating timer in there pocket and it was set for 5 minute intervals. When it went off, it was to remind the teacher to stop, notice and give a positive comment to the student. For example, "Great handwriting there Bob!" It might even be just making eye contact and a smile. Catch them when they are good was the theory. Then as the time went on, the time would be increased, weaning the child off this crutch.
The other day, my husband used this at his work. He was having trouble with not getting the young staff to do what was expected, so I got him to put 5 coins in one pocket. Every time he gave a complement he had to move one coin across to the other. It worked like a charm!!! The young girls were so compliant because their efforts were being acknowledged.
I altered this in my classrooms. I bought hundreds of marbles and used them to fill jars on desks for individuals, groups and even for the whole class. Then 15 years ago I started it with my kids, giving praise and filling bottles up with marbles so they could see that they were getting rewarded. I always walked around with a handful of marbles rattling in my pockets!!!!
They say you need to give 5 compliments for every negative. This is really a difficult thing to do for all of us.
I haven't thought of a consequence yet, the counselor just said to set the timer for another 10 minutes. I am going to start the rewards more for positive behavior. I like the marble system. I know I have a lot of changes to do with my parenting. I am getting anxious for my son's counseling appointment. I am trying to make a list of important things to tell him. Well my son went to the psychologist yesterday and he dx'd him with also having Chronic Motor Tic Disorder, and Depression. I talked to him about the tantrums and moods and he said it could be part of the ADHD and gave me some things to try when parenting. He said if he has a tantrum or mood swing I am supposed to set a timer for 10 min and let him have his tantrum and if he stops before the 10 min turn off the timer. He said other parents have tried it and it stops the tantrums fairly soon. He also gave my son homework and that is to say okay mom if I ask him to do something like clean his room, get ready for bed, do his homework, etc. So we will see. He also thinks if we give him a medication along with his Strattera for his tics they will maybe supress a bit.Great to hear that you have had a proactive appointment. So what is the consequence for not stopping the tantrum? We have suffered many periods of tantrums. Usually it canbe linked to the wrong meds or stressful situation at school (bullying usually the culprit). Our son's tic's have become worse in the last 6 months. It's amazing how the tics go crazy when there is a hint of stress.
Our son is older (15) but we have treated the tantrums in the same way for the past 4 years - calmly tell him that the tantrums are no appropriate behaviour. That if it continues then we will have to take him to the hospital/ring the police bcause he is out of control. The we set the timer for 10 minutes. Then we leave the house and stand outside. Therefore not giving him an audience. This is where I usually ring my 84 year old mother for support!. Then after 5 minutes I go in calmly and check - if he is still is going remind him that 5 minutes to go. He has always stopped within the time. I have yet had to ring for assistance but if he didn't stop then I would have to follow through.
When he has calmed down I will go and explain how this behaviour is not on. Then I will state that any mess that he has created has to be picked up. Then when things are back to normal I'll try and address why the problem happened and work out what we can do. At the moment it is bullying at school!
There are so many medications out there and they can all cause problems for different kids. Paranoia, aggressiveness and that feeling of being tightly wound up. Some medications can bring about these reactions soon after taking it while others can take weeks even months to slowly develop the negative symptoms.
If this behaviour is the result of learned behaviour then you need to modify the behaviour by constantly rewarding positive behaviour giving him "the carrots" to motivate him to positve behaviour. Stopping the tantrum from happening.
For the past 15 years both in my classrooms and with my two ADHD children I have used checklists and a marble system similar to that outlined on this website. The idea is to constantly reward good behaviour and set small goals.
Good luck with your challenge.
Our DD was like that without the medicine or whenever her dosage was wrong. We are having some similar issues with our daughter right now since we lowered her dose for the summer.
You may want to take him back to the doctor. He may need a dosage change.
Depends. Is it happening in one environment or in all environments?What is his Strat dose? It is dosed by weight, NOT symptoms, and if it is too high, or too low he will have these problems. were you seeing these issues before you started meds?You know I'm having the same problem with my 5 1/2 year old with the Strattara. He takes 25mg a day. This past week has been a nightmare, he had to leave his friends house because he had such a bigh tanturm. I call them meltdowns though. I know the past week he has been on Amoxicillin for an infection in his ear and thats when I noticed a change. I'm going to call his phyc doctor tomorrow to see if this could be the problem. Is your son on any other medicines besides Strattara?
My son is taking 35 mg of strattera. he was having these issues before taking the medicine. i had hoped that after starting his meds he would get better but he isn't. Its hard to tell if he is getting worse. he does a lot better in school but I don't know how to help the anger issues. I really like the marble idea. I am going to go get some jars and marbles and try it with all of my kids. It is very challenging to raise challenging kids. I keep hoping after we get all the meds figured out it will get a little better.Yes- a child psychiatrist can dx and treat your child plus prescribe meds.
If your child's behavior is just happening at school, do you think there is something there that could be causeing it? Maybe a bully or too much negative feedback, or unable to keep up?
My son goes to the dr today do you think if I ask for him to be on 40 mg it may help a little with the tantrumsHow did the doctor's appointment go? Let us know what happened and how you both are doing.Well we went to his pediatrician and he checked his height and weight and temp. I told him about his mood swings and tantrums. He referred us to a child psychologist. I have been doing alot of reading and I wonder if my son also has touretts or child onset bipolar. My son has a lot of tics but those were also before the ADHD and the medication just the the mood swings and tantrums have always been here. He has an appointment with a child psychologist on Aug 6th. I hope I can keep my sanity that long. Wow- August 6th is too long. And a psychologist cannot prescribe meds. If your Insurance allows it, look for a pediatric psychiatrist in your area. Perhaps you will be able to get an appointment sooner.Yes it seems like forever til Aug 6th. I will check into a child psychiatrist. Will a child psychiatrist dx him also? He doesn't just behave this way at home it happens at school to his teacher said.I am looking forward to my son's counseling appointment.
His behavior is happening at home and at school. He is a very smart kid too. He tested above average with his IQ etc.
I will bring it up to his pediatrician when he goes on Friday. Thanks for all of the info.Well I managed to change my 8 year old's appointment with a counselor to July 9th. I am so excited. I have been reading alot about bipolar, Oppositional Defian Disorder, and Tourette's. I really think he is a combination of ADHD, Tourette's, and Oppositional Defiant Disorder. There is a medication I did some research on too called Catapres that helps kids with ADHD, Tourette's, etc. Maybe the doctor will put him on that to try if he does infact have Tourette's.At my sons last dr visit he weighed 60 lbs
[QUOTE=mmc722]At my sons last dr visit he weighed 60 lbs
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so he is n target, his range is 32 - 49. He could go up a little and that may relieve some of the moodiness.
ok thank you for the advice. he has an appt on friday i may see if we can get it to go up to the 40