HELP! | ADHD Information

I need some help.  My son was taking Strattara 25mg but he got so agitated and having so many meltdowns that they had to take him off of it.  Right now he's just on Clonidine .25mg in morning and .50 mg at night.  He has been on Adderall and Ritilin in the past with the same affect.  He also has anxitity issues and that is why stimulants won't work on him.  My thing with him right know is the defiance and walking out the door when I'm in the other room.  He's only 5 1/2 by the way.  When I call his phsycotheripst she's not in this week and neither is his counsolar.  (Sorry about the spelling).  He was just on Zyprexa but he gained lot of weight and all it did was zombie him out.  I am at my wits end with his behavior this week I could scream.  Anyone with helpful advice would be appreciated.  I already grounded him from his outside activities for today and maybe tommorow but I'm not sure he fully understands why.  I keep telling him that I'm the boss and he's the child and he will listen to me or lose his bike and pool. 

Ouch. I know the feeling of wrong medication. My son was misdiagnosed and mismedicated and it was really bad!!!

If you have a pediatrician I would call her/him. if you think he might be a danger to himself, you might take him to the ER. They may be able to tide you over with a prescription or give you a referral.

BTW- when my children ask why I tell them 'because I said so'. I don't let them engage me. They don't say it much anymore. Both my boys are grounded this weekend for writing on the walls with marker and the inside of my car with marker.

Im a situation like this I would get a second opinion as far as the diagnosis. The original poster is not saying that the child is danger to himself and others. If the parents took that advice and told that to a pediatrician they would put the child in a psychiatiric ward in lock down. The ER wouldnt give the parent a presciption for anything for the child without knowing why the child is having such a melt down. Very misleading advice. This child might have the wrong diagosis, thus, the wrong medication or even if the diagnosis is right, what does the child learn about following rules when they are told your the boss or to do something because you said so. Not so great behavior modfication techniques. How is that working for you? Medication is not a behavior pill. Medication allows the child to make a choice but unless you teach the child how to make a choice, they will not learn anything because you "said so". Grouding the child is not going to snap him out of the behaviors. I recommend you get a second opinion. If he is that defiant you may be looking at something other than ADHD or something more.

hi nnjpolive.

I'm very sorry you're going through this. It's hard enough raising these kids, but it really does take every ounce of patience when things are not going right.

Sam E is correct that meds are not a behavior pill, however, having the wrong meds, or wrong combo can make children moddy, and exacerbate bad behaviors. The right meds can increase positive behaviors as the generally lower frustration levels and DO allow the child to learn appopriate behavior. This all takes time to sort out though. Maybe a parenting class would be helpful. Plus reading some books on behavior and discipline. Positive behavior plans are VERY slow in progress, but really do work.  Although I am a firm believer in consequence and reward. So if you are using the marble system and the child observes a rule they are rewarded with a marble for their cup if they disobey the rule they lose one. With my daughter (no ADHD diagnosis, but VERY difficult at 4), when she had inappropriate behavior she went to her room until she was calm, then when she was ready to act appropriately she could come out and we talked about how to have handled it differently. Whenever she appopriately handled a typical situation she acted out in she was praised effusively. This took months, but it has been ongoing and we saw a complete turnaround.

With the right meds and right behavior plan you CAN do this. You need to see prescribing physician to discuss your med concerns and if you're unsure of the diagnosis, get a second opinion.

[QUOTE=Sam E]Im a situation like this I would get a second opinion as far as the diagnosis. The original poster is not saying that the child is danger to himself and others. If the parents took that advice and told that to a pediatrician they would put the child in a psychiatiric ward in lock down. The ER wouldnt give the parent a presciption for anything for the child without knowing why the child is having such a melt down. Very misleading advice. This child might have the wrong diagosis, thus, the wrong medication or even if the diagnosis is right, what does the child learn about following rules when they are told your the boss or to do something because you said so. Not so great behavior modfication techniques. How is that working for you? Medication is not a behavior pill. Medication allows the child to make a choice but unless you teach the child how to make a choice, they will not learn anything because you "said so". Grouding the child is not going to snap him out of the behaviors. I recommend you get a second opinion. If he is that defiant you may be looking at something other than ADHD or something more.[/QUOTE]

Hello- this is the first time I need to disagree with a post in this forum.  The original poster is at wits end with her child right now. The advice I gave is "IF" she thinks her child is a danger to himself not to wait until Monday. I know- I have gone through the gamut with my 8 1/2 year old son the last few months.

Hospital ER's do NOT automatically send children to a psych hospital or lock down. They can also monitor the child in the ER and administer a sedative. I don't advocate medication as a cure all either, if you all remember I weaned my son off all his meds a while back and he did very well for quite awhile. However he was unable to do schoolwork or not disrupt his class and I was receiving negative feedback from the neighbors and my friends about his behavior deteriorating.

Jon went to one of the leading children's hospital in the United States a month ago - Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami under the care of Dr. Daniel Castellanos who is internationally known and is the head of the part of the hospital Jon was in. He had a team of 6 professionals lead up Jon's care. A parent saying, "Because I said so" and then not answering can diffuse an angry child with ADHD faster than anything. Children with ADHD or Bipolar or just a child - want to engage their parent in converstion. It was explained to me that it is a power struggle. If you engage the child in explanations that they are not going to listen to anyway at that time, then they have WON.

Sam E - I am listening to the professionals and it has made a world of difference to Jon. No disrespect and not to be confrontational (which I am not) but my lessons were learned after my son almost died due to his actions and mis-medication and diagnosis so I know what impulsive kids can do without thinking!

Randy

randyjim39627.2915393518I think Diane V's "parenting class" advice could help for the future but for today...I wonder if grounding him from outside activites will just make things worse.  Don't get me wrong, I don't believe he should get away with anything but maybe a trip to a park or something like that would be great so you can both just let loose and blow of steam.  (Just a thought)

I thank you all for your advice.  I do think he was misdiagnosed.  When I'm not frustrated with him and he ask why most times I do explain but it is a power struggle with him b/c he wants to be the boss.  My husband thinks he has bipolar.  His moods are like Dr Jeakle and Mr. Hyde.  He can be the sweetest kid one minute and the next turn into a monster.  When he was first diagnosed the school pyscotherpist said he had ADHD/mild Autism.  Last year before he started Kindergarten we took him to Riley Children Hospital and they said he just had ADHD.  At the time he was on Risperdal/Clonidine.  It was working as far as the moods go but the hyperness was still there a little bit.  When school started we took him to Hamiliton Center for Children.  The doctor there diagnosed him with Aspergers.  Which by the way I don't think b/c he does not exhibit any traits of this condition.  I have been reading alot about bipolor in children with adhd and it pretty much fits his behavior, thats why when the doctor is in Monday I'm going to have her test him for that.  Also, tell her my concerns about his being misdiagnosed.  Which it probably tee her off.  I'll let you all know what happens... Thank you....

Well SamE, I have never heard of a state where the ER automatically sends a child to a psych hosp or lockdown. I don't know the state you are in but I feel badly if I misinformed anyone. I will try to research the 50 states individually and see what the laws are and then report.

I always think it pays to be safer than sorry- especially with our precious children.

NNjpolive,

Are you in Indiana?  I notice you said you went to Riley.  Our DD went to Riley to be diagnosed first and they told me she wasn't ADHD but that I was a bad parent (I had my DD very young).  If you are in Indiana I would suggest checking out Behavior Corp.  They have an office in Noblesville and another in Carmel.  They are FANTASTIC!!  They will work with you tirelessly to ensure that your child gets the proper diagnosis and treatment.  You can even call them at any time for emergencies (and they answer!!).  I don't think we could've gotten through the first couple years without them. 

Good luck!!  I know how hard it is!!

Thank you navywife30 I will look into it.

randyjim wrote:
Hospital ER's do NOT automatically send children to a psych hospital or lock down. They can also monitor the child in the ER and administer a sedative

In my state they do so you can disagree all you want but depending on state law, mine for one, they certainly do so be careful about the information you pass on to parents as factual or something that holds true across the board.

NNjpolive, I hope you can find the help you need for your child. D'ont give up hope!

 

The doctor put him back on Zyprexa .25mg before bed, she said to watch what he eats.  He was diagnosed with ADHD/Aspergers Odd/OCD.  It has been three days of the medicine, I'm starting to see a little difference already.. still difiant at times.  He also had his Clonidine cut down to .25mg in AM and .50mg in PM.  I know he did better on the medicine before, but the weight issue we worried about and thats why we took him off.  I wish we didn't though because the first part of his summer vacation was a nightmare hopefully it'll get better quick.  I'm not much of a drinker maybe 3-4 times a year but I had to have one last night because of all of this.  I don't think I'm a bad parent for doing that though he was in bed.   Well thanks for listening.

Hi- glad to hear you are are doing better. Sometimes it's two steps forward, one step back with our children. You are not a bad parent for having a drink. You need to take care of yourself, too.

Randy