Stigma and Bipolar-NOS | ADHD Information
Perhaps you could talk to your dh and discuss this matter. It would not be too hard to set up rules for ALL the children about being nice to one another. And then enforce them. Even if your ds breaks rules he needs to be shown that there are limits to his behavior.
My ds(adhd) has two siblings that pick on him and I have taught him to come to me with what has happened. Siblings get to see that ds gets something special when he does not retaliate. And when one of the siblings does something nice for each other- they get some extra night time stay up.
Good luck!
Step children, biochildren or whatever I would NOT allow that type of behavior in my home. I would make it VERY clear what behavior is acceptable.Definetely make a list of rules, for everyone, and stick with them. I wold also speak to their BioMom about their behavior. I am guessing they are only in your home on the weekends? If so I would speak to DH about rules also, and make it clear that you won't put up with that behavior. Ok, I am sick and tired of the stigma associated with a child who is bipolar/ADHD. No-one understands, and everyone is constantly threatening my child with verbage like: "you're a retard, dufus, mental, bipolar, or "I'm going to kill you" or "slit your throat". I hate you and other negative things. Even if a child is not bipolar or ADHD, children have no right to convey those negative comments to our children. I am SO pissed off at the whole scenario. I just wanted to vent.
Ah....a little better. I don't allow my son to be disrespected like that. I definitely speak up when I hear anything like that - my son's school thinks I'm a monster because of it, I'm sure. Where are such things being said and what are you doing to stop them?Oh, I am a monster as well and totally unfair. I have been told that I am favoring my son over my step-children because I stop the name calling immediately; and instead of disciplinig (spanking, etc) I approach the situation differently and because of that I am a B***h, unfair and that my son derserves to be punished. My step-children are uneducated about bipolar, yet I bring home educational materials about it, with hightlights to pinpoint specific behaviors, etc. The step-children are ignorant of it and very defiant when it comes to learning about it. WE have family meetings, that is geared towards my son's behavior and how to deal with it, yet it goes in one ear and out the other. The step-children are aged, 9-12Thank you all for your thoughtfull responses. I appreciate it. This helps me vent and realize that I am not alone in this matter and that my way of handling it is the proper and most effecient way. My step-children come down every summer for 45 days, two weeks in December, and one week in Feb. My own son visits the same way. However, last year during the summer my son was tried on the Abilify and at that time it was wonderful, because he was nothing like he is now. Which means the meds are not working although they have been increased. This summer has been pure hell because he is not on a new medication although, I am working on it. After lab work and those results are in, we will change the medications. So, again, last night, kids were playing and then taunting mine, and all hell broke loose because my son sensed the teasing and as a natural response defended himself. Two of the step children tried to teach my son to ignore the taunting, so kudos for them. I know its a long process but one worth the end results. It just takes time and lots of patience!!
Tammy