oldest son choking youngest son | ADHD Information

Jake is four (soon to be 5) and Mikey is three. Jake has always been on the aggressive side. He is verbal and we encourage him to 'use his words', etc, and model appropriate 'scripts' for him. He has very low frustration tolerance. If he doesn't get what he wants immediately, he reacts (usually angrily). Well, this morning, he wanted a power ranger that Mikey had, and when he asked for it, and Mikey didn't immediately give it to him, Jake put his hands around his throat and choked him. I was standing right there, and immediately grabbed him, removed his hands from Mikey and placed him in time out. He was told 'hurting people is not allowed'. This keeps happening continually. When he gets up from time out I had him apologize to Mikey and give him a hug (which was not actually remorseful in any way, but atleast its something). How can I keep my youngest protected from his older brother, while he's working on learning how to manage his aggression? I'm seriously physically seperating them probably 10 or more times a day. Mikey is even starting to become more aggressive now, because he has to 'strike first' so to speak. Other than providing extensive supervision (which never prevents it anyway), is there any way to keep my youngest safe?   

Has Jake been diagnosed with ADHD? Is he taking any medication?

No.  He has not been diagnosed, though I have my suspicions.  He is not taking any medication.  His current diagnoses are Apraxia with sensory issues, and a gross motor delay (mainly coordination and balance).Maybe it's time to get a neuropsych eval (although he is young). His aggresive impulsive behavior is quite obviously getting in the way. Does he get OT for his sensory issues? You are right that you absolutley need to keep your younger son safe. Have you implemented a positive behavior plan?> Like the marble system on this board. So this way when he reacts appropriately, like waiting for the toy politely, he can be rewarded.He did have OT for awhile when he was younger, but no longer qualifies through the school, as its not obviously impacting him in the classroom.  I'm working on implementing the marble system.  However, I also work full time (though often from home when I'm able), and am waiting for the weekend to start it -so that I'm here to follow through on everything the first few days (not sure the babysitter will be as thorough).

Who do I request a neuropsych eval from?  Where do I even start?  His pediatrician, developmental pediatrician, or a psychologist? What all do they do during this type of testing?

a neurospychologist will perform the testing. It takes several hours. They may split it over a couple of visits. Does he have a developmental ped? What do they say?

The dev. ped checked him to see if he had an ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder).  They felt that he did not qualify for that diagnosis at this time, but that he does have Expressive Language Disorder (which had been previously diagnosed -more specifically Apraxia) with a mood component.  They mentioned something about resolving autism, anxiety and the dr did make some note about strattera.

My main concern for him initially was HFA or Aspergers', but now I'm thinking that it may be more ADHD, since I read about the hyperfocusing (which he does).  I have no idea.  He's just aggressive, moody, and very rigid.