My 7 year old has, for quite some time, had what seems like an unusually high interest in sex. He is always trying to catch a glimpse of me (or my mother if he is at her house) getting dressed/undressed. If I am wearing a low cut shirt and bend over for something, if he is nearby, then he is trying to look down my shirt. He asks questions about "boobs" a lot, and just little things here and there that you might not think much of by themselves, but when you think about them together, combined with what I have already mentioned, seems like the interest of a much older child.
I brought it up with his behavioral specialist and she immediately blamed it on something he had seen on tv or the internet. I don't know what he watches at his father's house, but I can assure you that at my house he only watches age appropriate shows like cartoons or iCarly, Hannah Montana, etc... As far as the computer, he is only interested in playing games. He goes to websites like nick.com cartoonnetwork.com and such as that. Since he can't read or spell very well, it's unlikely that he's searching for porn when I'm not around. I can hear the computer at all times, even when I can't see it and he's always playing a game. Besides, if he did see something, he wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut about it LOL
Is this fairly common with ADHD, does anyone have any similar experiences? I have kind of buried my head in the sand in regards to this, which I realize is probably not the best approach, but I just didn't know what else to do. I have tried talking to him about it, but really haven't gotten anywhere.
His father called me tonight and said that he and his older (9 yrs) brother started a "sex club" at the babysitter's house and he was supposedly caught asking a 2 year old to pull her panties down. His father has taken his usual approach and yelled at him, which I am not sure is the right way to handle it. I know he needs counseling, but if you have seen the other topic I have open right now you'll see that he's with his father right now and isn't getting *any* ADHD intervention.
Could the 9yr old brother or some other older boys be causing the interest in sex? If he is hanging around with older boys he may over hear some things. When one of my kids ask a question that seems age inappropriate or otherwise strange. I ask them what made them ask that question. Sometimes you find out it was something they overheard from older kids or saw on TV. Its also easier to answer if you know why they are asking.
My older son always asked questions about sex, body parts etc. I just answered w/ as little info and facts as would satisfy his question. He was asking at 5yrs. He never saw anything inappropriate anywhere. He was just curious.
My AS/adhd son who is 5yrs now is interested in potty talk and sometimes sees what kind of reaction he gets from saying the names for body parts. His newest editions are "balls" and "boobs"......
They said the "sex club" thing they got from a kid down the road that they have since been forbidden to play with. I never liked him, and it seemed whenever they went to his house they would end up in some kind of trouble. They haven't played with him (or haven't been allowed to play with him) since before school let out, so it seems odd that it would come up now.As for the 7 y/o's interest, he's had it for years, and he acts more interested in the subject than the 9 year old. Whenever he asks a question, we try to answer it with as little detail as possible, as calmly as possible, hoping that he will think it's no big deal.
The sex club thing is concerning. If it was my son I'd have him talk to a councellor to make sure it wasn't something that was going to linger.
My son is aware of bodies, but it's no big thing. It's a source of humor for him. He's "exposed" himself a few times, but it was a mistake or it was done for laughs. It doesn't sound like that's the case with your son.
It sounds to me like talking to your child about bodies and sex is a big deal for you. If you're uncomfortable then your son will be able to pick up on that and know something is going on that he wasn't being told about.
Actually, if was my son I think the first thing I would do is call his pediatrician and ask what he would do if it was his child. There's a fine line of making too big a deal out of it reinforcing the memory of the behavior and making sure that your son understands personal space.
Good luck with him.
It's a big deal only because it seems much more than a casual interest for him. We always answer his questions and try to answer them nonchalantly, but I don't know if he picks up on the fact that I think it's a big deal or not. Some people do just have a high interest/drive. I agree that it is too much for a young child, but maybe he will naturally be that way. Sounds crazy, I know. My ex husband would tell me things that he figured out on his own when he was like 5.I'm not sure what to advise. I'd be really concerned if it were my son - especially the sex club thing. I do agree that the counselor option would be at the top of my list.
My heart is with you.
It sounds like you may have found the source of information. It's good that you cut off the relationship with that child. Naturally, it would be best to talk with the kid's parents because he might be an abused child. Women can be so dumb about who they expose their kids too. It seems we just can't comprehend the whole sexual abuse thing. It's hard to talk to other parents about these things.
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