to medicate or not | ADHD Information

My son was diag. with ADHD in 1st grade and has taked different med. since.  The medications have never helped him to be totally focused or a straight A or B student.  We stopped over the summer and planned to try school w/out med.  He has attended high school for 2 weeks.  This morning my husbund and I met with all his teachers plus some.  There complaints were focus, outburst, and staying on task.  We deal with this on a daily basis.  He wants to control himself without med.  I am proud of him for that but I want him to succeed.  I am so not sure about this.  I have talked to doctor and trusted family.Hello, letmebreathe. Being on meds for adhd does not make a child an A or B student. Some children just are not A//b students no matter what! If I may make a suggestion- you are to be commended for letting your son have a say in his treatment. on that note- perhaps your son can speak to the doctor and tell the doctor what he would like his goals to be for school: perhaps minimal meds at first to help with outbursts and focus and then tapering off to see how he does. Let your son maintain a dialogue with his doctor as well as with you. In the final decision though- you and your son can come to an agreement- perhaps no meds if the teachers say he doesn't have an outburst that day or if he can stay focused. Let us know what happens.letmebreathe I agree with Randy in letting your son have some say, with you and the doctors guidance. My daughter is 14 and starting high school also. Last year she did fairly well on Daytrana and we were tweaking doses and times and she looked at both me and the docotr and said, I'll try a different med, but I DO NOT want a patch, it has to be in pill form. So to respect her we changed meds (mind you we'd exhausted almost every option of stimulant by this point) to a generic long acting methylphedinate and she's doing great! She takes it twice a day and she will come to me and say I think it's time for my meds, she knows exactly when the first dose has worn off and hse's struggling. She will NEVER be an A or B student, we have actually moved her to an alternative school this year, but she is going to be who she is going to be and we just want to help her to do that. Sounds like you guys are making the right choices here, by teen years they have to help form their own path. Does he say why he doesnt want the meds? Did he have side effects?Just food for thought...Wyatt's teacher tells me that he seems to be getting a little better every day at controlling impulsive behavior.   He is working very hard at it and the teacher and him are both figuring out what works together.  We hit the teacher jackpot this year.  I know it isn't the same for everyone though.  I wouldn't let it go too far but maybe even just a little more time would help.? He has to learn right? Maybe figure it out on his own?

Letmebreath,

How does your son feel about his level of achievement and interaction with others at school.  If he feels good and is happy with his current level of success, then initiate a 504 plan that will keep him successful at this level.  If, on the other hand, he is frustrated, his circle of friends is limited and his attitude at home is deteriorating, then seek outside help.  This could be in the form of therapy and/or meds. 

The bottom line for all of us is..."will my child be able to support himself and live independently?"  To that goal, it's our job to help our children build the foundation to achieve that ends.  None of us want to force meds on our children, but as a last resort, meds can help achieve focus for academic success and positive peer interaction both very necessary to achieve the goal of independence.

Paul

Thank you for the replys.  I just wanted to add a couple things.  My son will be 14 in less than a month and I strongly believe at this age he should be making some choices in the med. that is going in to his body.  He has taken all mainstream drugs he is pretty resistent to them.  He has had all the "normal" side effects such as not gaining any wieght, sleepiness, irritible,etc.  He has also, while on med., pulled out most of his eyelashes, constantly pulling on hair, and a phobia of spiders/bugs that may or may not be there. 

 

 

Lemebreathe,

My guy will soon be turning 14 as well and also wants to have those choices.  It sounds like he's had better success with meds then your guy so he knows that with them he does better than without them.  He's also had side effects as well but his pharmacologist has been responsive and modified meds when the side effects occur.  Again, (as I'm sure you already know) it's not just meds that see a kid through but also a good therapist.  A good one will help you  judge when it's no longer within your son's power to interact effectively with his environment.  At that point the decision needs to be made to either help with meds or change the environment.  Changing the environment may mean starting school 2nd period instead of 1st because he can't get up in time.  It might mean being pulled from mainstream classes and moving into special education with more one on one teaching initiating or modifying a 504 plan....you get the idea.   

So I guess the real question is...if your son does not want to take meds and he is unable to function productively in his current classroom setting, are you prepared to change his environment to one that is more suited to his "lack of focus, out burst and inability to stay on task?   This is the decision I make everyday and let me tell ya...it ain't easy.

Paul

LETMEBREATHE,

    my daughter also pulled out her eyelashes when taking Concerta. BOY that was a tough one to get over! We wouldnt touch any kind of stim after that for a while. Then I got my nerve back and we did give it another shot and have used Daytrana and Methylin since without that horrible side effect. Thank goodness my daughter is so willing to try. She just knows how much better she can feel when the meds are right. That incident though put me on a path like Paul described of moving her school setting though. So over the past year we've done a LOT of work and we did have get school to place her out of district and we got her meds straighteneed out and now I think we're in a pretty good place. Again Paul's right, these are tough decisions and no one else can make them for you. 14 is tough, they're still children and ultimately you are still the parent and really do know what's best.......................

Good for you for allowing him the choice. My son wasn't given a choice and knew he didn't have a choice to med.s, because he needed them. He's going to college this year and never once asked to go off medication. Thank goodness, because he's difficult enough sometimes on medication. If they can manage in school, and with relationships why not keep them off med.s.