Good Morning everyone,
I've giving a little background info first.
I am kind of new here and can't believe the posts I have been reading. So many people are going through the EXACT same situation as me. I wish some of you lived on my same street so we could vent to each other over coffee...or wine.
I am totally on the verge of tears today. My son started on Vyvanse 3 weeks ago. This is his first time on meds, he is 6 and is in first grade. I avoided even mentioning the possibility of meds for the longest time, I just knew I could help him get through what he was getting through by some other means.
My ds often speaks of dying, killing himself or that we should just kill him because he does not deserve to live. I just want to cry everytime we go through this. There was a boy in my county who is 15 (I think) who recently killed both of his parents...I worry that I need to help fix my son now so it does not lead to that with us. I know it sounds crazy but it is something I think about. My ds is so cute, very very smart but constantly talks about himself being stupid and dumb and undeserving.
I just wanted to give a little background. So my son had to see a psych to get started on meds. During the first visit they came up with the conclusion that they weren't sure if he had ADHD or was bi-polar (because he discussed killing himself). They decided to start him on 30mg of Vyvanse. It worked like a dream the first two weeks at school. I couldn't believe the differnce. At home was different but I just chalked it up to the meds wearing off and him needing a release from being so good all day. His downs would be wayyyy down and the temper tantrums...ugh! He had a two week follow up with the psych. We met, we talked for a few, I asked if we could send Stephen out of the room for a minute because there are things I don't feel should be discussed in front of him. When we were done talking I asked him 'Ok so do I got wait in the waiting room while you talk to him or do you talk to him with me in here?' He gave me this puzzled look and said that he just manages his meds. Then it was me with the puzzled look. I asked him 'You give kids these meds and don't even talk to them to get to know them?' He said that Stephen should still see his counselor and that's not how they do things there. I was floored!!!! to say the least.
How on earth can you manage this type of medicine with out knowing the child you are giving it to!!!!
And now this week my son is starting to fall into the same old ways very early in the day and I know his meds may need adjusted and I do not want to go back to that ?doctor?...pill pusher?...what ever he is.
I am truly sorry for all the parents who go through this with their children. It is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with...I think I may need meds myself sometimes.
Any advise...or just someone with a common experience would be great.
Thank you and thank God for support groups!
Wow thirty minutes was a long visit. My son and husband were there for 15 minutes today.Our son was assessed by a neuropsychologist and prescribed by his pediatrician after she read the neuropsych's report. Whoever prescribes the meds needs to know your kid. They need to talk to him, ask HIM how everything is and what he thinks. He is the reason you're there!Hi there. My son was also expressing thoughts (and actions) of no self worth and wanting us to kill him or he would just kill himself. This was when he was at his worst and to make a long story short we had him transferred to Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami as an inpatient. I loved their care, their taking him off all meds to observe him for a few days nonmedicated, the way they had a panel of 6-8 doctors, socialworkers, psychiatrists etc working together to help Jon. Before the seroquel he was great after his minimal meds in the morning and afternoon. He got antsy and slightly contrary in the late afternoons and evenings but it was manageable.
Decide if you trust this doctor with your son's life. It is his future that they are dealing with as well as the present time. When he voices violence against himself it is a cry - a DESPERATE cry- for help. You can get the help he needs- just don't give up.
Randy
It's no consolation of course, but adults are treated the same way! Ask around... there's got to be some professional in your area (pharmacotherapist, perhaps?) who is willing and able to work with your son's total picture, not just writing a script after a diagnosis.I have been lurking awhile but your post finally made me come out and register...
It's the same way in our town- separate doctor for therapy from the one from prescribing meds.. At least ours speaks to my son when we go for an appt though...not very much. Very frustrating to have to have 2 separate docs (not to mention expensive!)
Can I ask why bi-polar was ruled out? Sounds like he might need a complete neuropsych evaluation.
The same thing happen with my daughter. She was tested by a child psychologist for ADHD. The testing showed she had the combined type of ADHD with some anxiety and depression. The psychologist referred her to a psychiatrist on staff. I was not at all pleased with the psychiatrist. My daughter sat and played with blocks while we talked for a few. She never interacted with my daughter. After our 20 minutes was up, she booted us out the door. She started her on Concerta. We gave it to her for one day and it was horrible. When I called the office, they said to quit giving it to her but they couldn't prescribe anything else until her next office visit which was 5 weeks away.
That is when I had all her records transferred to her pediatrician. He is now managing the medication, in addition, to her seeing the child psychologist for counseling. Have you talked to his pediatrician?
I have heard of someone else using their pediatrician...and I may just do that. Thanks.
He has an appt today to with the psych to increase the meds a little bit so we'll see how that does and then I'll contact his pediatrician for future visits.
I don't think they have ruled out bi-polar yet but they did say and I have read else where that depression and anxiety could come from having ADHD and so they wanted to give meds to treat that. And if it helped with the ADHD than maybe the others will subside as well.
And then reading all the posts on here, I see that my ds is not the only one who has such self doubt from having ADHD.
Thanks for your post and thanks for joining. I was so happy to find this board. No one knows what we are going through unless they are actually going through it.
I also am not please with my son's first visit this week. The Dr. did not do any type of activities with him. We spoke for about 30mins with my son in the room. My son is 5 and started kgarten this year. He has struggled with his behavior since day one. Thankfully the teacher has been very patient with him and listens to me each and everyday that I walk him to class.
Back to the Dr visit, will my son was playing with a car on the floor making sound effects with his toy and he said he has tics. BLEW ME AWAY. He said those noises were not normal. I explained to him that he makes noises only when he is playing with his toys, which I thought was NORMAL for any child to interact with thier toys. And, he also said he has ADHD. Ok, my thought was, you did absoutly nothing with my child, so how can you diagnois so quickly. LEFT and have not followed up with him yet. Thinking of finding another DR.
I did begin the marble discipline this week and it has worked very well. He has gotten a smiley face 2 days in a row at school and our home has been quite peaceful.
I wish you luck and I sure feel for you and your family. It makes me sad to see or hear of a child struggling at such an innocent age.