Do I have valid concerns re: my 6yo??? | ADHD Information

My 9yo, Autistic/ADHD son is what led me to this forum and wonderful source of support and knowledge. But now it's my 6yo that is eaving me wondering and concerned...

My 6year old has always been a highly spirited child; he started walking early, talking early and is incredibly bright. Yes, he has lots of energy but nothing that I would consider abnormal; he's just highly energetic, NOT what I would consider "hyper".

My concern lies in his ability to focus and the disparity of his level of attention. I can tell him a list of things to get (shirt, pants, underwear, socks) first thing in the morning and it might take him 4 or 5 tries to actually get everything I asked him to get. It's the SAME things he has to get, EVERY morning..... I mean seriously, you have to wear clothes to go to school! He knows the routine and always will come downstairs with only 1 or 2 of the 4 items and will be whiny and fussy about it the ENTIRE time. When I ask him to repeat back what I asked him to get, he says "I don't know" or "I don't remember". Sometimes he remembers everything but says he doesn't know why he didn't get everything.

My boys go to bed early (no later than 8:30, but many times it's 7:45-8:00pm and they are asleep within 10mins or less). So, I don't think it's that he's tired is the issue; not to mention on the weekends he's perky and happy first thing in the AM.

The same goes with anything we ask him to do. I will ask him 4 or 5 times to do something and he'll either blankly stare at me as I get more upset at/with him or he'll just flat out ignore me. He's looking at me and I'm assuming is listening, so what is the deal?

He can't sit still and watch TV for more than a few mins at a time. Like I said, it's not hyperness, he just doesn't seem to have the ability to sit and watch something for any length of time. To me, it's an inability to focus and attend. Homework is almost always a battle with LOTS of prompts that need to be given.... there are some times that it's quick and easy (where it takes less than 15mins) but there are other times where it drags on FOREVER (for upwards of 2hrs...  see the disparity... 15mins to 2hrs is not what I would consider acceptable. The work isn't too hard *In fact, I think most of it is too easy*).

SO far at school this year, he hasn't really gotten in trouble, except for talking. (he's in 1st grade) My son is a very social guy and he LOVES to talk! (he gets it honestly... I was the same way in school). Last year he was CONSTANTLY in trouble but this year's teacher seems to focus on the positive behaviors and doesn't count him down for every little time he talks (which is good... his self-esteem was shot last year). However, I'm finding he doesn't always get his classwork done (in class work) and it's almost always for talking. (yet he's not getting his sticker taken away for the day... which is a bit confusing to me.. LOL). I'm anxious to talk to my son's teacher at conferences next week to see what she sees at school.

The same goes for soccer. He LOVES it and he really is good at it, but his inability to pay attention and focus on what his coach is trying to teach him, causes him to slack off and skip around the field in the middle of a game! (although this is much improved over last year; he's playing U8 even though he's only 6....).

I'm planning on talking to his pediatrician about this, as we talked about it in the spring and he said if we noticed issues still in the fall, to come back and we'd talk about it. He's still having issues with reversing letters and numbers (with regularity, he switches almost EVERYTHING) and has a really hard time focusing on his work when he has to write more than just words (when he has to form thoughts into sentences/stories....).

Do I have valid concerns or am I expecting too much out of my 6yo? Thanks all!

I off and on have similar concerns about my 6 year old. My 14 year old has ADHD, plus other learning disabilities.

Some of it is us being "gun shy" because of our older children. However, in reading your post, I do see that my 6 year old continually improves in ALL areas of concern every year. I am much less worried about her than I was a year ago and even more so than 2 years ago.

Some of this is just 6. I think in your situation, however, I'd pursue it . I say this because of the last paragraph. The number/letter reversal and difficulty writing. My youngest used to reverse and had a LOT of handwriting issues. She never reverses anymore and her handwriting, although still messy, is dramatically improved. My oldest (remember she's 14) STILL reverses. OK obviously 2 different kids and it doesnt mean anything at all, but with all those concerns together, it wont hurt to pursue. My oldest struggles and always did with writing anything. She just couldnt manage all that, forming thoughts then trying to write it and keep the thought there. My 6 year old has recently gotten homework for spelling to write sentences using her spelling words. I of course was like, are you kidding! Way too hard for a 6 year old. She did it with NO problem. Her spelling (of non spelling words) wasnt always perfect and her sentences were sometimes silly, but she was completely capable of thinking up a sentence and writing the whole thing down.

If there are any issues why not get him the help NOW. OT can help with handwriting and with accomodations you can scribe for him. If the homework is the thinking up the sentence and not being graded on the actual handwriting, no reason he cant dictate to you, or an aide. For a spelling test in school, why not be allowed to take it orally? So many available accomodations if he has anything going on.....................if he doesnt they will say, no issues and you address it differently.

I think your concerns are valid, and worth having him evaluated. If there are
issues, then better sooner than later in addressing them. Take care and hang
in there, I know it's rough.

Nancy