Need advice, 3 yo showing signs of adhd | ADHD Information

I'm new here, I just came across this board, it's nice to see I'm not the only one going through this.

I've been wondering for about 10 to 11 months now if my son has ADHD (at first autism was suggested to me, but I'm pretty sure that's not the issue).  He's 3 years old and I'm honestly not sure what can be done for him at this age.  He's in a pre-school program with our local school district and he does have an IEP.  At one point the school wanted us to drop him off at School in the early morning, at about 9am he would be bussed to a different school, then mid-afternoon he would be bussed back.  I know my son well enough to know that he would have a melt down over this type of situation, so I didn't want to put him in this situation.  The school agreed based on what they knew about him.  Unfortunately, my husband and I work and cannot transport him ourselves in the middle of the day. 

I have another appointment with the school in two weeks to update the IEP, but I'm not sure what will really change because he's not going to do well with being bounced between two schools during the day.  The reason we are updating the IEP is the speech therapist that has been seeing him is having a vast amount of difficulty with him.  Normally when I hear this I think it's the adult not connecting with him.  He does really well for some people and then there are other people he wants nothing to do with and there's really no reason I can figure out for it.  Also, the speech therapist is thinking that he no longer needs speech therapy, but really she thinks he needs special ed which would focus on the behavior.  I agree, but getting a situation for him that won't cause a melt down may not be possible.

The reasons I think he's ADHD, he never stops.... never... ever!  He can also talk for litterly hours and never hush his little active tongue!  And I say that with all the love I have for my child and the moments of insanity and desire for a little silence.  :)  He also has the shortest attention span of any child I have ever known, except one, his cousin.  My son and my nephew exibit nearly all the same traits and my nephew has been diagnosed with ADHD and is on medication for it.  The only time either of the boys would seem to calm down or sit still for any length of time was/is when the TV is playing something they like to watch, otherwise there's no slowing down.  Oh and my nephew will be 7 in about 6 weeks.

Here's my delima, I don't know what to do to resolve or come up with some kind of treatment for this issue.  We were referred to a child psychologist, but the wait to be seen and start the evaluaton process is about 6 to 8 months.  Is there anything I can do for a 3 year old?  If so, please point me in the right direction.  I want to help my son and I'm at a loss right now.

As a mom of 7- let me tell you that 3 year olds are terrors! Going to school and having a full day is too much for a child of this age. They need naps and down time and unstructured time to get rid of excess energy. Children at age 3 aren't dx'd adhd and the meds are not appropriate for them since their brains are still growing rapidly.

My eldest son's pediatrician told me to get a pair of earplugs and get some quiet time when preparing dinner or anything that didn't involve driving. They worked great. Now I can mostly block out the extra chatter but know when something is wrong. Plus, all my children and I interact all the time as they are homeschooled.

I know you are worried about your son. Why is he in preschool at age 3? I thought they started at age 4. Plus- an IEP for a three year old? What do they expect him to learn? Numbers and letters and colors are probably all this age is capable of.

You are on the right track to speak to the school. You might tell them that there is too much pressure on your son right now and to limit his lesson time. when he is home, let him play and run around. Perhaps you could take a chair outside and read while he plays in the yard or take him to a park a few times a week. Hope this helps. Keep us informed.

Randu

Thank you for your reply.

They do provide naps at school and though I call it a pre-school it's technically a day care, though I have to say they do a lot of things like a pre-school, plus they have plenty of "free" time.  He does have to go some where because I work and can't be home with him and this seemed like a good place for him.

He has an IEP because I started to notice a significant speech delay and reached out for local services for toddlers to help him with his speech delay.  He's honestly mostly over the speech delay, but now other issues are coming up.  Though part of me thinks like you that too much pressure is put on him at this age, I also think there is something going on with him.  I also think he is too young to be medicated, but I would like him to be able to cope with situations like other 3 year olds, he definately doesn't deal with situations like the other 3 year olds in his class.

Oh and when he is home, he plays and runs around as much as he likes, I don't limit him burning off his energy.

Thanks for the additional info. Maybe the school he is in is just not a good 'fit' for him. Perhaps you can look into others in your area. He may be acting out because he misses you or because something happened at the school or even because a tv program scared him. It's always a learning experience with our children.

if you think there are other issues (and being his mom you would be most aware of them) perhaps you could ask for a referral to a child psychologist just to talk to for yourselff and have him observed. Or, if there is a university where you live, they might have a program where they can test him.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Randy

I think being in school is a good idea for him. Especially with an IEP in place. When you meet ask them what their plans are for a positive behavior plan. What ways they can work with him on transition issues...etc. Althouhg h' speaking well, he may still be behind in language skills and his behavior is due to frustration. In the meantime you can also research parenting styles and disciplinary tools to incorporate at home. Consistency is going to be key.

I also agree with pp 3 year olds are terrors! But they're still babies and don't understand a lot. Self control and impulse control are barely there, it's a difficult age, but a great age to begin a good behavior plan. ADHD or not.