Hitting, Name calling ..help! | ADHD Information
jaderock54:I'm with you on that. I have a sociopathic nephew and the parents were going off the rails with him as a child. Nobody but me would look after him. {wound up getting a premium babysitting job as a teen because someone else had a psychopathic kid no one would look after, either. Nowadays they call it ODD. Bluntly, lighting cats on fire for fun is psychopathic}
I could get my nephew to do anything because manipulation, screaming, battering, punching and manipulating his brother/sister didn't work with me. I refused to play the game.
I used to pick him up physically kicking and screaming and drop him on the bed in his room--starting with 20 minutes and adding 10 for every added misbehavior.
I locked him in there the first time for 4 hours--after 3 hours, he exhausted himself kicking at the door and screaming like he was being beaten to death. I put on headphones and ignored him.
A few bouts of that, until it really was only 20 minutes, cured that misbehavior in about 2 weeks. If he broke his toys in rage I chucked it in the garbage and refused to replace it. EVER.
After that--they called me "The Dragon Lady"
Yet I was NEVER the one that hit the kid
We were lucky--Metadate worked well for our DS, and we've not seen any of the hitting/namecalling behaviors. He's negative about things, but that's about it.
I think Jaderock's suggestion about time out in an area with no distractors is a really good idea, along with the quiet treatment. Consistency has also been very helpful to us, too.
Dee
My DS (age 5)recently diagnosed ADHD/Gifted only a couple of months ago. School was never the problem..but he is physically aggressive and verbally abusive to both my DD (age 7) and myself. If DD doesn't play with him, he hits her or if she does and they get into a disagreement he hits her. If she cries, he seems to get excited by it and hits her in the back. As for me, if I ask him to take a time out to get himself under control..he will hit me, throw stuff at me and call me stupid, idiot, dummy. He does his many, many times a day. We are a non-hitting family (so he isn't getting it from us) and we don't call him or anyone names. Two weeks ago we decided to try medication to try and get this aggressiveness to stop. He had an adverse reaction to Metadate (got more aggressive - of course), and has been 6 days on Adderall 10mg. We are keeping a med journal, as suggested here, and most days we feel that there hasn't been any improvement, maybe even sometimes worse. Does anyone else have this problem? Your thoughts..is this ADHD related?My son would do similar things while throwing tantrums when he was younger, not so much since he's been on meds. Check out the book 123 Magic- it worked wonders for my son.
What I found best for my son was to simply take him by the hand and lead him to his room (if he wouldn't walk I carried/dragged him). No talking, he knows what he did and why he's being sent to his room. When he wouldn't stay in the room, the door got shut, if he opened it, it got locked (only had to do that once or twice). The was much screaming and pounding and breaking of stuff- we eventually removed all the extra stuff from his room till things got under control. Being absolutely consistent, matter of fact and calm (at least outwardly) is the key.
You should see improvement in these impulsive behaviors when you find the right med/dose.
Out of curiosity, what does you daughter do when he hits her?