Hi
I am new to this site and was wondering if any other parents out there have a stepfamily/blended family with a child with ADHD as part of the step sibling mix?
My son with ADHD and PDD-NOS is now 9, I got married 1.5 years ago and he went from being an only child to having 3 step brothers (Twins 7, and a 10 year old) living with him plus another stepbrother who visits twice a month (age 11)
I had a long journey with his diagnosis as a single mother, he was first diagnosed with Asperger's but it didn't seem to quite fit so further assessments identified ADHD and PDD-NOS, I was resistant to medication but his schooling was out of control, he was running out of class, climbing on tables, being disruptive and aggressive and very depressed, I was at such a loss as a mother as at home one on one he was very manageable, but put others in the mix then look out!
Since being on Ritalin (20mg daily) he has improved dramatically at school and is doing much better with focus and concentration. At home with his new family is another story, the stepbrothers came with plenty of their own bad habits which I have helped my husband work on - they were quite aggressive and used to fighting a lot with fists and feet which appalled me, at first my son ran from it but then had enough and started to fight back.
Being in a stepfamily with an ADHD kid is hard, the stepbrothers are not strongly bonded with him so he just annoys them and he so much wants to be a "brother" but he tries too hard, he has become very centrally focused on his older brother and follows him and wants him to play ALL the time, its an obsession and we struggle to get them to have space, this leads to space issues, fights and rejection.
I love my husband very much but the amount of meltdowns and anger and anxiety my son now has at home compared to living on our own makes me want it back sometimes, can anyone relate or has advice?
Thanks