Not sure what to do or think | ADHD Information

My son was very frustrated and was on the fast track to being expelled
before he was diagnosed and the school started making accommodations
for him. What worked was giving him goals to reach for rather than
punishing him. I would get your daughter tested to see what's going on
there.

Best of luck to you!Your daughter sounds JUST LIKE my younger son.

You're probably more aware of ADHD and it's symptoms than the "average" person so you are seeing these things in your daughter at a younger age.

My son's doctor said I was more aware and in-tune with my younger son, because of having had to deal with my older son's issues.

I  would say get your daughter tested and take it from there. But her "symptoms" sound a lot like my son prior to starting his meds.
As far as the teacher pushing for medication, Im not sure where that idea came from, but thats not whats going on here. I dont know if her teacher is aware of her brother and his ADHD or that he is on meds for it. Ive not mentioned the ADHD to her teacher so she wouldnt even be thinking of that. Thanks though for the response. I dont know that my DD even HAS adhd or add...Im just thinking of diff things that it *could* be....hopefully thats NOT what it is, but at this point I just dont know. macsmom39838.8756481481It is a public school and unfortunately the only one she can attend due to our location and my work. I too feel she's gotten the short end of the stick on this and im VERY upset that I wasnt made aware of this sooner. She would come home with things on her calendar in her folder(rules are laid out for the class room and numbered, if she did something the teacher would put that days number on the calendar) and I would know she did something, but it was never told to me that it was THIS bad untill the first phone call. I also dont like the bully list, but it seems to be osmething the whole school district is starting. I also dont feel detention for a kindy' kid is appropriate. Its just obvious to me NOW that she's in need of help here, not just being "mean kid" for the sake of being mean, KWIM? The more I think about it the madder I get. Thanks for the replies. Perhaps get a private evaluation with a psychologist specializing in education testing or with a neuropsychologist.
Jessica N39841.8817592593I agree; having your daughter evaluated sounds like a good idea.
Also, just my 2 cents, but to me it sounds like the school has handled the situation very badly. Is it a public school or a private school?
What kind of school puts kindergarteners in detention??
What kind of school has a "bully list." I thought schools were supposed to help kids with any behavior issues, not label 5 year olds with terms like "bully."
Why weren't you made aware of issues your daughter was having earlier?? What steps has the school taken to help your daughter learn to behave appropriately in school?
I wonder if there are any other schools in the area that your daughter might be able to attend??
I believe kids, especially kids as young as kindergarten, need consequences (and rewards!!) to be immediate. More long-term consequences, such as detention and grounding are not likely to have an impact IMO.
What kind of behavior plan does the teacher use?
You might want to check out the "Marble System" thread in the "parents" forum. A lot of people find it very effective. And in the schools my kids have gone to, many teachers have used some kind of group version of it.
I know it really stinks when your child gets off to a bad start in kindergarten. I hope you're able to figure out what's going on with her (and the school) and get her back on track ASAP. Good luck!
I would get a full evaluation for your daughter. ADHD can present differently in 2 people in the same family.I think it worth the effort to do this for her.My kindergartner is having some problems at school and Im at a loss as to what to do. She started out the year kinda rocky, getting in trouble here and there like most of the class, and then it passed...then right before christmas she started getting into a little trouble again, but didnt seem like anything major untill she get a detention notice for yelling in the class room. But school ended up getting closed that day for weather and they let that detention pass. So fast forward to post xmas vacation, first week back...and she gets another detention for the same thing plus rolling around in the ahll way floor. Typical kindergarten stuff if you ask me...kids being kids and she wasnt the only one that got introuble for it. They threaten with another detention...then I get a call from the teacher sayings she is one step away from being put on the school bully list, which can ultimately result in being expelled. Im shocked to say the least...Im informed that she is "mean" to the other kids, says "mean" things to them, sometimes is physical, always smart assed (this is a problem at home too btw) and hateful to everyone. So I have a talk with her, her grandparents have a talk with her and she is grounded ...for the first week she does better...but now its happening again. Teacher calls me yest tells me that she hit a little boy in class, a boy that im just now finding out she picks on all the time according to the teacher. She also tells me that DD NEVER looks happy, NEVER smiles..seems to really hate being there. Now this especially is news to me. Everyday when I pick DD up from my parents house she is SO excited to tell me about her day and show me her work etc etc etc....so it seemed to me she enjoyed school. Apparently the other kids dont want to play with her because of her behavior (so the teacher says)...and when I ask DD about this, she says she doesnt know why she hit the boy, why she is mean and hateful...says no one has been mean to her, and doesnt seem to have a clue as to what the problem is. I dont know what to do. She is a smart ass....talks back...but isnt mean at home. She's one of the happiest kids I know! Always full of hugs and kisses, laughter and smiles....Im at a loss and Im worried for her. The ONLY thing I can possibly think would be bothering her is her lack of visitation with her dad. He does seem them, but not as often as he was because he has recently gone back to driving a truck over the road and isnt always in town on the weekends. This sometimes upsets her VERY briefly, but never has seemed to be an issue. I dont want her on this bully list, and its obvious that SOMETHING is wrong with her and its NOT just a case of her being mean for the sake of being mean or TRYING to be a bully. The teacher said she will have the school counselor talk to her this week...but beyond that what do I do? How do I get a nearly 6 yr old in kindy to open up and tell me what is going on in her little head? Academically shes doing excellent, shes so smart...im so worried for her and Im feeling like SUCH a failure right now...and im scared for her....

Also...she has a brother who is ADHD and I know that shows up differently in girls....and now im wondering if this is a sign of her having it as well? But again...I dont really know...

This is what I posted on another message board I belong too and thought I would psot it here and get your opinions on this. COuld this be a sign of ADHD or ADD? Some other things she does are:

Talk constantly, cant shut up to save her life...which a LOT of people have told me is just a girl thing lol

Bad temper, bad bad bad....argumentative and talks back really bad, has to have the last word, throws things, hits things, hits the person she's mad at (tho has never hit me) stomps and has tantrums.

Maybe Im just reaching here on this, I dont know....but Ive read that alot of kids with add and adhd have siblings that are diagnosed with it also, and that it shows up very differently in girls sometimes. I hope its not this...but on the other hand if it is at least I KNOW what the problem is ....otherwise Im at a complete loss and dont know what to do for her.