I feel guilty, plz. ease my concerns | ADHD Information

My son age 5 1/2 just started on Dexedrine.  First on just a 1/2 tab, had no effect.  So, gave him a full tab (5mg) for the last 4 days and he has done great.  His biggest problem in school has been TALKING.  He is pretty hyper and can't control his talking.

He brought home execellent work today and a smiley face for his behavior.  Which just never happens...  For the whole month of Jan he only got 2 smiley faces.  So, this is a big deal for him.  Of course, I praised him, till he was tired of hearing it.

I just feel bad that I have to medicate my child to get good behavior in school.  He is not struggling at all academically.  

I ask him, does your tummy hurt, head hurt, do you feel fuzzy or funny...I just wish I knew how he was feeling. 

Please help me get over this guilt.

 

 

 

 

If your child had a broken leg, would you want the doctor to put a cast on it and give you some pain relievers for your child?
I know it's not exactly the same, but in a way it is. Our children have a brain disorder that they can't control or fix themselves. Most behavior modification training only teaches your child to be selfish and manipulative (since they are smart after all), and not treating them at all is only allowing them to suffer.

We have started meds for my son and have seen a difference. We also found that the other alternatives did not fit into the standards for how we wanted to raise our children. Our psych also said that there really hasn't been any data that shows other therapies or diet changes or any of that really works, especially as your child gets older (teen years) they might need to adjust dosing or what meds they take, but meds will work.

Don't feel guilty for treating your child's medical condition - it IS a medical condition and not something we parents just make up - you've got support here, and glad that you've got a med that's working!

UPDATE***

This week at school he got 1 straight face and 4 smiley faces in a row....Man, I am so happy for him.  He has seemed much happer this week. 

Even in the evenings when the meds have worn off, he is still very calm...unbelievable...doing home work without to much of a fuss...

His teacher said he is doing great!!!

I am a proud MOMMY....luv my baby boy.

ranbel .... I was in my younger son's classroom this afternoon for an ice cream party and the teacher went on and on and on about how much my son has progressed since starting the meds 2months ago. The turn-around has literally been 180 and he's becoming such a prolific reader (whereas literally 2months, he struggled with the SIMPLEST of books like "see spot run") and his math skills are amazing! She's incredibly proud of the the tremendous progress he's made (as are we, as his parents) and said that she's so happy we got the issues worked out so that Holden can finally learn to his potential. And the fact that he hasn't had to move his whale since he started meds tells me just HOW MUCH he could NOT control his impulses, etc.

Good job Mommy AND to your son! Sounds like things are going great!!!
I agree with everyone here--the only reason to have guilt would be if you were NOT helping your child. But you are! You ARE doing the right thing. :)

Dee
Mom - you're doing what's best for your son even though it hurts your
heart. Give yourself some credit for doing the right thing.

I know it's the right thing for him, he is such a different child, now that he has the right dose in him. 

He was never a bad kid, didn't do bad things, just very impulsive.  I think my child will grow up to be an inspirational speaker (this is per his brother in law whom is a pastor) or a politician.  Because the boy knows he loves to talk.  He also uses very LONG intelligent words and the right context in a sentence.  He really amazes us with his language.  Even his therapist as commented on his language skills.

Thanks for making me feel better. 

Have a wonderful day.

 

Don't feel guilty.  I'm in a reverse position.  I was untreated for ADD until I was 21.  My 2nd grade teacher told my parents that I had ADD and they just shrugged it off as nothing since I was still getting decent grades.  Sometimes I wonder how much better my life could be right now if I had been diagnosed and treated when I was younger... I could be in pharmacy school right now...  But, theres no point in dwelling on what you can't change and I like who I am now so I try not to have any regrets.  Regardless, you should not feel guilty, I'm sure someday your child will realize how much you've helped him and thank you for it.  The only reason to feel guilty would be if you did not medicate him.

I just wanted to add that how guilty would you feel if you never got your child effective treatment and as a result of that, as an adult, due to impulsivity and low self esteem, your now  adult child was on the wrong side of the law. I'm not saying that medication is a magic bullet but each child deserves the best chance possible to meet their full potential in life. When my child was young I thought that school problems were the biggest problems in the world. Once they are young adult, parents who haven't been there yet have no idea how bad it could really get in terms of problems and heartache. You would long for the days in the past when you were battling with teachers, trust me. The only time a parent should feel guilty is when they don't  try to do everything possible to ensure that the child has quality of live and an equal shot at success like every other child. The parent is doing their job when they do what's best for the child instead of allowing fear and the desire to be right to over ridge good judgement.

Don't feel guilty, as the others have said you're treating a disorder, and in the process helping your son succeed.  As for the talking issue, when my son was first put on medication he had the same problem and it was starting to drive me a little crazy - luckily it tapered off as he matabolized the meds.

Good luck!