13 and steals, lies, girls, suspension | ADHD Information

Hi Suzyq,

It sounds like he has a low self esteem and is trying to impress the kids at school.
Has his meds been reevaluated since puberty started????? It changes the meds and their effect and your son is definetly been going through it!

It really sounds like his hormones are out of control and his meds need to be loooked at. ONce some kids start puberty their meds stop working, completely. They either need to change the dose or the med. It depends on the individual.

Your son is acting impulsively right now. He needs to have his meds fixed. I know of another mother who warned me about my son and sex when he gets into the teens, she was having a lot of problems with her teenager and thought it was a adhd thing, I am still not sure.

Check on his meds, and get the 0 back from the girl. She was wrong to take it!!

Please let us know how you are all doing. My son is shy of 12,so puberty is just around thecourner for us!! Your posts will help us and others!!

Which type of ADHD does he have? Impulsive I'm guessing?

It sounds like he's describing things he'd like to have, blurting them out,
and then feels like he has to back them up or be called out on them.

I agree with what the others are saying - sounds like his meds aren't
cutting it anymore. Maybe he's just grown or maybe they've lost their
effectiveness.

The suicide threat - my son started making threats when he started a
new med. Definitely take that one seriously.

I have a personal theory that negative behaviors associated with ADHD
are caused by the child being frustrated with ADHD. If you can stop the
frustration from occurring, you can stop the negative behaviors.

It's a rough age for any kid. Talk to him and listen to him. Make sure he
knows you're on his side by pointing out to him the little things you do
for him, like "I noticed you were getting low on that cereal you liked, so I
bought some more." Kids think of their parents as disciplinarians and
lose touch with what we do for them. They need to be reminded
sometimes. If you make a point of doing it on a regular basis it might
help him see what's really going on. And once he knows for sure that
someone, you, are on his side, he might have the strength of character
not to mind so much what the other kids at school are thinking of him.Thanks for responding.

I agree that what he said to his friend, including wanting to kill himself needed looking into. You did the right thing.

I think he is going throught the teen years, along with puberty. Talk about the meds, it really changes them and like I said they can completely stop working or need to be tweeked.

Keep us posted, we are here for you. You are doing the right thing, especially talking to the school. I still might say something to the principal about the money, who knows who the girl has told. and believe me, girls are BIG talkers.

Hang in there, come here with us other parents with children and talk. We are here for you whenever you need us!!

Thanks for your response.  Yeah, I'm taking him to a new dr @ UC Irvine next week.  They also have youth programs.  I too have heard that sometimes the meds need adjusted.  The psych he currently sees just pretty much ignores me anytime I have concerns, and he just writes another RX, and out we go.  I can't stand him, that's why I've been looking for another.  Oh, one more thing...he had an issue at school the week before. Told a friend at school he was nervous about us going to the school that week to review his 504, didn't think his parents cared, etc and "maybe i'll just kill myself".  There's been so much in the past two weeks I forgot that one.  The worst one.  When confronted he said he didn't mean it.  I took him to the hospital to have him go inpatient, but they didn't think he needed that. 

The only thing with the 0 is that he initially denied it, but when he pushed me and hurt me, my husband really lost it.  He and my husband talked and he admitted he took the money.  I threatened to go to the principal and tell him that he gave the girl money, but then he told me that he doesn't want the whole school to know, I think due to embarassment, etc.  I guess I should bring it it up to the principal.  The other thing is, I asked the principal "did you have him talk to the counselor?" 

 

I most definitely will.  This is the best ADHD board I've found.  I just wish I had more time to spend reading some of the posts.  Both my husband and I work, my husband is running our business and works a 50 hr week job.  I'm sure this doesn't help, but we have no choice.  I'm sure there's alot of others out there too.  Thanks for your support.

Help me please!!  I don't know what to do with my son.  3 weeks ago, he stole 0 bill from my husbands wallet.  Just found out he gave it to a girl at school.  He lies all the time.  Made up a story in class the other day that he had a huge bank account and lamborgini.  HUH???  Grades are bad, except in a few classes he likes.  He back talked to me the other night and when I went to grab him he pushed me and I fell into a CD stand and hurt my arm.  Went onto my husbands phone when he was sleeping and looked at some girls my space.  Got suspended today for sexual harassment because of something he wrote on a paper.  He's currently on 54mg concerta and 1.5 Risperdal for the ODD.  I see a rapid decine in him...anyone else have this issue?  Time to revisit the Dr, no doubt.  How do you get your child into an alternate school? 

You guessed right, impulsive.  Yeah, I agree with you.  It is a difficult time for kids, even w/o ADHD.  Hopefully we'll get on board with a good dr and program tomorrow.  I do let him know I'm on his side. I talk to him all the time about what other people think isn't important, etc.  I bought him a new pair of shoes over the weekend because he really was on his best behavior.  He's really into them and wants to wear them to his church youth program tonight, but when I told him "no, because it's raining, he's starting with his attitude.  The kind that got elevated last week when he pushed me.  My husband said, "see, that's why you shouldn't have bought him those shoes."  I just can't take anymore of this.  I hope we figure this out soon. I hate to say this, but when he acts like this I get scared and want him to go away...not good.

I've gotten to that point with my son, too. And do you know what I do? I
send him away. He has a sleepover at his grandparents or somewhere else
and I take the time to recharge. There's nothing wrong with needing a
break. It drains you, probably a lot more than even you recognize.

Hopefully his doctor will put him back on track so these behaviors will stop.
Another thing - work on getting your husband back on board, too. You
need to have a united front to have the consistency your son needs in order
to find his way.

Best of luck to your whole family.

SuzyQ, Please let us know how you make out with the doctor's appointment. I still think once his meds are back on track, things will be better. But remember, ADHD or no ADHD, teens will be teens. He is going to do things that even those without adhd do. He is going through those years of growing up and finding himself. But he certainly needs a little help from the meds. Believe me, I know I will be right where you are in a few years, if not sooner. This is helping me as well.

Hang in there and post us an update!!

Thanks!!