how to explain ADHD | ADHD Information

So, I am always looking for a good way to explain ADHD to non ADHD
people. I mean what it actually feels like and the problems we face, not
just a list of symptoms. I feel like people often explain it poorly which
leads to more people who are not understanding. I feel like you need to
look at the root or reason instead of end result which is what most people
do. For example, lets use dyslexia(I don't know much about this so what i
say will be inaccurate most likely). If someone says" I have trouble
reading and spelling because I have dyslexia" people would have trouble
understanding. However, if you said "words get jumbled up etc..(and
explained what it was like)" then they would understand much better.

When I was diagnosed I was 11 and this is how my doctor explained it. It
is simple yet effective in explaining it I feel. He said "Your brain is like a
TV flipping through the channels and you have to work on stopping on
one channel and watching the whole show"(or something to that effect).
So, I often use this to explain what it feels like inside an ADHD person's
mind. I say "Think of my brain as a TV, it flips through channels and finds
one it likes, it stays there for a little while, then finds a new channel and
then a new one and it switches back and forth between these channels,
however, it never stops on one channel for a whole show and for that
reason it doesn't really get the big picture from any of the shows it
watches"

I try to explain what I am thinking at the moment too. I'll say "Right now I
am thinking of how I am talking to you, and what I need to do today, and
that midterm I have tomorrow and this really cool concept I read in my
book that I am fantasysing about and a few other things and my mind is
jumping from one to the other but never really gets to finish one. So, as
you could imagine this makes sitting down and immediately focusing only
on reading my textbook really difficult. I don't have a lot of control over
this, i try but my mind jumps around a lot and it gets frusterating. As you
know I work hard and get good grades and try REALLY hard to control
this so if I could easily control I would. It's like a person with OCD, they
may have a compulsion that seems really pointless and you may think
just stop, but you know it is not that simple and if they could they would.
So, when I go to read on top of all of that I am easily distracted. So, while
you may be able to tune small things out easily, it is really hard for me. If
someone walks by, a loud car goes by, someone near me talks, a phone
vibrates, etc... I'll distract me and I'll look up. Obviously this is a problem
cause there are not many places with absolutley no distractions."

I also have a lot of trouble transitioning and sitting through long lectures
or movies but I don't have a good way to explain that.

Anyways, I was just wondering what you guys thought of my explaination
and how you would explain it or if you have any other additional info or
comments. Thanks. musicfanatic39894.960462963I think you're off to a good start.  However, everyone experiences ADD/ADHD differently and while some of us may be able to understand your explanation, others may say that they'd explain it totally different.

For me, if I'm watching TV, i can zone out from an image or a word that comes from the TV and then my mind wanders.  Before you know it, a few moments has gone by and I've lost track of what's happening in the program.  I can't tell you how many times in a show that'll happen.

I also have problems with memory.  So, I write notes and I have them all over and then I lose them because I've forgotten where I put them.  While my disorganization has gotten better, when I'm stressed, overwhelmed or something is important, all the organizational skills I have go right out the window.  You may as well just take all the "stuff" and toss it in the air and let it fall where it goes.  That's how my brain works.

Thanks.

The way I describe it to people is this....

When a normal person looks up at a clear sky at night they see a starry night and they see the stars, they may look at one star in particular but they still see the rest of the sky around it.

When an ADD person looks up at the stars they look at the sky they see a star, then they look at another one, and they look at another one.  They see single stars at a time without seeing the whole picture.  Its harder for them to focus on everything at once, and can only focus on one star at a time.  When they see another star they look at it, and then another, and another, and get distracted and lose their focus on the previous one.

I think that makes sense but I'm not sure.

I like the tv analogy too though.

Thanks for the ideas. I like the star thing. It is important to remember it
effects everyone differently. I see that a lot. It seems like if a lot of people
know one person with ADHD they think they all dead with similar things. Just
because you meet someone who is really hyper, doesn't mean everyone one
with ADHD is. I guess it just bugs me how uneducated people can be about
it. It goes the same way from other learning and psychological problems. It
is just so common, it would be nice if people knew more. Anyone else got
any ideas? musicfanatic39897.8616319444

This is always a challenge.   It's hard to explain why our forgetfulness, or disorganization, or irrascibleness, or whatever, is really different from their forgetfulness, or their disorganizaton, or their irascibleness.  People just naturally say "I experience those same things."  It's a challenge to explain your ADHD without feeling defensive or without it sounding like some veiled excuse!

.....maybe a good way to explain it, if someone asks, is for both of you to name some of the common, ordinary, plain-vanilla kinds of traits that everybody experiences and everybody has to deal with the consequences of: forgetting things, putting things off to do later, losing things, interrupting, getting distracted, tuning out in a conversation, feeling anxious...you get the idea....

then, explain to this person that for some folks--like you and me--their brains come pre-set, "hard wired", to function differently, and to function in ways that tend to exaggerate these traits--both their frequency and their magnitude.  Which, understandably, causes problems!  Point out that it's a genetic trait with the same high probability for inheritance as height!!  And, because our brains are hard-wired this way, the effort we must exert to reduce these traits (along with the woe heaped on us for having them) is way more than what is usually required.  Plus, there's this irony: We're not as stupid as we sometimes appear to be.  It's not that we don't know how to do things the right way (or proper way, or considerate way, or sensitive way, or...), it's that, because of the way our brain's mechanics work, it doesn't happen that way consistently.    No matter how hard we try. 

You could also point out some of your strengths or special qualities that you attribute to your having ADHD  (even if they may not be ADHD related, who's to know for sure!)....

If someone knows I have ADHD and asks, I'm happy to try to explain.  Otherwise, I don't try to explain ADHD to others very often.  Even though most people are clueless as to what ADHD is really like, they're also, by and large, not that interested in knowing.   Too bad for them....they'll never know what they're missing!

John D39908.6341319444 I also like your TV channel surfing analogy.  I was diagnosed w/adult ADHD about a month ago (I'm 41) & have also been trying to find a good way to describe what it's like to the few people I've told about my diagnoses.  (spouse, certain family members, etc.)  I've recently read another analogy from an ADHD adult that is another pretty good description of how my brain works.  I'm an internet junkie (as this person was as well) and they described it as living in a constant "hyperlink" world.  Just like your TV channel surfing, when I get onto the web, I can't stay in one place for too long because there's just so many damn interesting links to check out!  Next thing I know, 2 hours have passed, I've completely forgotten what my original topic to check out even was, and I've blown off every thought of doing anything else, like chores, helping to get the kids fed/bathed & even make dinner for myself (when we have "fend for yourself" night).  Of course, the Strattera that my Dr. has me on manages to shoot my apetite to hell, so I really don't miss eating very much now either. (Not a bad thing if you're trying to drop some pounds.)  Of course, when I'm not in front of the computer, I stare at the piles of paper, mail, bills, & other clutter all over the house & just get depressed thinking "I need to clean this stuff up but how in the world am I going to even get STARTED & how can I get it organized?"  (Answer to self: Let's sit down on the couch & think about how to attack the problem. 2 minutes later -- Oh wait, look what's on TV!!  Hmm...wonder what's on the other channel....click, click, click)  An hour later, wife is harping on me that I don't do much but lay around either on the computer or in front of the tube!!  My answer is I'll take care of it tomorrow. (Tomorrow comes & the process repeats.)
Does any of this sound familiar to anyone?
geogator39899.5100925926I have heard the TV analogy before and I can absolutely relate to it.  I got laid off from my job in January 2009 and am at a loss about what my next job will be.  Unfortunately for me, if the "channel" does not change often enough I get bored, restless and unintentionally disruptive.

I am not ashamed of being ADHD...depending on the setting I am in I am willing to openly tell people that I am.  I just wish if I could have more successes with it.  I am so loaded with ideas and creativity...my channel just changes too often for me to fully realize a success.




AddMe

 You raise an intriguing question, how you explain your inner reality to someone else without the disability.  I think of Tennessee Williams, who I'm quite sure from reading about him, had ADD. He says,"There are not 'good' or 'bad' people.  Some are a little better or a little worse but all are activated more by misunderstanding than malice.  A blindness to what is going on in each other's hearts."

Hope you don't mind a little venting, but sometimes I feel so lonely.  I'm a senior with inattentive ADD, and find while the public is somewhat familiar with ADHD, they don't have a clue about my form.  First, they often laugh when they hear of an old adult having ADD.  Then they treat me like a liar so I don't mention it anymore.

I think the slow processing is the worst.  They act like I'm retarded, but if I was, I wouldn't feel so bad when I can't figure everyday things so fast.  But I  have a masters.  I think I'm way off topic and feeling sorry for myself.

It was touched off at a meeting with a special ed. teacher who ws talking about how many children were overdiagnosed as ADHD in her 30 years of t ed also how ritalin helped only one she knew in all those years.