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I have been in treatment for about 18 months for depression and GAD. The depression improved slightly. About 2 months ago my psychiatrist had me tested for ADHD. At the time, I thought he was wrong. It turns out he was right. I have worked for the federal government my entire life. I am an analyst. I am worried about getting fired. I have been working every other day for a year to accommodate my medical conditions. Soon I will run out of leave and will not get paid for the days I am not at work. At this time I think my health is more important than a paycheck. What I agonize over is that my boss is trying to fire me. She went to HRO and had them write a letter to my psychiatrist about my medical conditions and the affect on my work. I also have a mild cognitive disorder. HRO told her that I provided good documentation and that a reasonable accommodation was to let me work every other day. She then tried to have me fired because I received a rating of 2 on the NSPS job performance. Again, HRO told her no. I cannot work as fast as other analyst and am expected to work as efficiently. I sometimes forget how to perform routine jobs. What is really scary is ,y written reports, which is almost the most important job aspect of an analyst. I am grammar and spelling errors and I do not see them when I proofread my reports. I also have trouble putting my thoughts down on paper. I miss the good old days (about 8 years ago) when just about every office had at least one office automation assistant to make reports smooth, make travel arrangements, perform the travel claim paperwork, and do your time. I do not know what to do about my poor job performance. I try to focus on one task at a time but our office priorities change so usually this is not accomplished. I get distracted by people stopping by my desk for information they need for their urgent project. My reports are good but sloppy. I feel like a loser and my self esteem is non-existence. I have weekly talk therapy sessions and they are not helping. My therapist does not specialize in adult ADHD. He thinks if I gain back my self-estem, all my work ussues will go away. |
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