My son is the same way. He's not disruptive in class and he's gifted, so no one ever considered ADHD until I brought it up. His teachers say (when asked specific questions) that he's forgetful, distracted, and disorganized.
He's lost shoes, lunchboxes, hats, gloves, coats, books, and even his pencil box (it never leaves the classroom - where did it go?). He forgets everything from homework assignments to library books. He gets distracted while you're talking...even while he's talking. It's really frustrating when he stops in the middle of a sentance and starts a moment later on a totally different topic.
He's also very sensitive - reacting strongly to both positive and negative things. His emotions tend to run very hot or very cold and never last for very long. So he might cry because someone hurt his feelings, but 5 minutes later, he'll be playing with that same kid. He's also sensitive to noise, touch (scratchy fabrics, labels, etc.), and sight (bright lights, quick movements, etc.). Those are all symptoms of ADHD and common traits of gifted children...which makes it hard to convince people he's got ADHD.
We've made a few changes that seem to be helping:
His school gives each kid a planner and the teachers have them write down homework assignments, activities (PE, Library, etc.), due dates, big events, etc. Every night, we have to sign the planner, even if he didn't have homework to do. That's been helpful with homework and remembering things like library books and PE shoes.
We've also worked hard to establish routines, break down instructions into smaller chunks ("brush your teeth and get your jammies on" instead of "get ready for bed"), create a sense of responsibility with chores and allowance, and praise him for successes. He seems to be a lot like me in that he learns better when he writes things down himself, so we have him write down anything we want him to remember.
Lastly, but most importantly, we've put him into a sport each season (football now, basketball later) and kept him as active as possible with both structured and unstructured activities. He's not hyperactive, but he fidgets constantly. The activity helps him focus and keeps the fidgeting to a minimum.
Take all that for what it's worth - I know my son's symptoms are pretty mild and the steps we've taken may not help other people.
I applaud you for pursuing this and for trusting your instincts about your son. It can be hard to convince people that your bright, sensitive daydreamer has ADHD.
hi, im worried about my 6 1/2 year old son, fear he may be showing signs of adhd but im just not sure! he's not what i would call hyper (although he has his moments!) but the inatention is deffinatly him. he has never been able to stick to a task. we're lucky if he will play with something for 5 minutes before he's lost interest. he has never completed a jigsaw and rarely sees a board game through to the end. he asks for things out (playdoh, paint etc) then 2 minutes later he has had enough. he says he hates school as it is boring and avoids homework and reading at all costs although he is perfectly able to do it if he can just concentrate. but at school his teachers say he is very well behaved-very quiet!!! although they say he needs help staying focused on work. at home he often doesn't listen, needs telling lots of times and even then can still look confused about what he should be doing! i have 2 other sons aged 8 and 3 but they don't seem to struggle like my 6 year old, he has always been hard work, never content to actually play with anything only imagenary games he has made up himself. his other issue is he seems to have no control over his temper and will have tantrums over the smallest thing and has recently been having complete meltdowns where he will shout, be agressive and lose control. again he has always been quite emotional very happy and loving one moment but quickly getting frustrated , angry or upset the next. sometimes i watch him and think there must be more to his behaviour issues and other times i think i am overreacting i just don't know!!! any advice would be great!He very well may have inattentive adhd. You need to have him professionally evalulated. I would contact a pediatric neuropsychologist at a children's hospital. I would also talk to his pediatrician. Then you will know for sure and start early getting him help
Please keep us posted!!
He sounds like my 5 1/2 year daughter who has been diagnosed with ADHD but is not on meds. She is very emotional and has the tantrums.