NEW diagnosis & No Idea what to do 1st! | ADHD Information

Hi! I'm new to the forum, ADHD and what all goes along with it! I am looking for  advice. My son is 6 (soon to be 7) and he has been diagnosed with an Inattentive Form of ADHD. I am trying to keep him off medications but I'm not sure what to do otherwise! My son's DR. has suggentste behavior modification along with Meds, saying w/o meds that there is a very low success rate.

I want to set my son up for success in school so... not sure what to do. I think he's getting frusrated and so is his teacher. Please!! Give me your advice. All the side effects of the meds seem so scary! I just feel lost!

Thank you,

Vicki

Welcome! This message board has been an amazing resource for me. My son is 7 and was recently diagnosed as ADHD but we have suspected it for years.

We tried all sorts of behavior modification techniques and some were effective for quite some time:

- Rigid schedule. Predictability is key for ADHD kids

- Avoid overstimulation. Any environment with too many people or too much stimulation always ended in major meltdowns.

- Choose your battles. If our son didn't want to sit and eat dinner we didn't force him. He really is unable to do it and it always ended badly. Let the little things go.

- Understand that your child is not like other children. Advice and critcism from others is often more hurtful than helpful.

These techniques helped us manage ADHD for quite some time but this year (2nd grade) we did resort to medication. It has been the only thing that has really, truly helped our son. I believe everyone has to make their own decision on this and we felt comfortable knowing we had really tried everything else first.

Take care and keep posting!

The best advice right now is read everything you can get your hands on to help educate yourself on the options.  This board is a great resource and most of us have been where you are now.  The decision about whether to medicate or not is a tough one and each person has to make their own decision.

That being said, we did try all of the other "non-medication" remedies with my son and they did NOTHING! The only thing that ever helped him was medication.  I can only speak for my situation but once I saw how much happier my son was on medication the side effects weren't that important.  They can be controlled and dealt with because I know that my son's only hope of having a somewhat "normal" childhood is to take his medication! And helping them be happy, healthy, and successful is all we ever want for our kids!

Good luck in whatever you decide and keep coming to this board.  You will learn so much!

I felt the same exact way as you, just 2 short months ago.  We're still learning and figuring things out.  I, like you, was hesitant to start with the medications.  But, my son changed my mind.  He's 7.  He was having such trouble at school, HATED it, HATED going, HATED everything about it.  I told him we were going to go see our doctor and see if he had any ideas about what we could do to help him do better and like school a little more.  He replied "That's good mom.  I need to learn how to be a harder worker."  THat was IT for me.  I knew I had to do something and get it done NOW before he ended up hating school as much as my father and little brother. (Who I suspect were also ADHD or ADD if those terms were used way back when)

It's worrisome.  I've lost a lot of sleep worrying.  We're on our second medication.  The first was Concerta.  Lost of people like it but it made my son angry.  We switched to Metadate CD and it's been working well.  Virtually overnight my sons confidence improved.  Within a week he stopped saying he hated school because he's actually able to sit and pay attention.  He was lost before, felt "less than" because he just couldn't "get it".  Now he does.  His focus isn't perfect yet but the medication is giving him the ability to concentrate and he feels successful because of it. 

My son is very thin naturally so I make sure he eats a big breakfast including half or a high calorie, high protein breakfast bar.  Instead of juice I also give him about 1/4 of a can of an energy drink in the morning that's got 4900% of B vitamins in it.  B12 is supposed to help with focus.  I've got protein drinks I make sure he sips on after school and I make sure he eats a good evening meal along with a good snack before bed.  He doesn't eat much at school for lunch so I make up for that where I can.  Also, please note, I've not given 1 thing to my child without my doctors consent.  He's very open minded and considers my ideas and suggestions.  Some he veto's, some he says are ok. 

The other thing was not being able to fall asleep at night.  He now gets at least 30 minutes of "down" time, either reading or watching TV, while laying in bed.  I give him 1 3mg tablet of Melatonin about an hour before his lights go off.  Sleep problem solved.

So, that's where I'm at.  THat's my story, in short.  I can only tell you to hang in there and forge forward the best way you know how.  Find a doctor that's willing to listen and monitor the situation as it progresses.  My son still is required to go in every month to have his progress checked.  AND, our doctor doesn't call me crazy when I ask about "natural" remedies.  He admits he doesn't know everything and actually takes the time to do a little research before he comments or tells me "yes" or "no".

Good luck!  Hang in there!

coffeebean73, you are soooooooooo right about your suggestions for behavior modification.  Reading your list I realized that we do many of those things with my son just out of necessity but I never really put it in a list before.  These things are wonderful advice and living by them will make everyone's lives easier!  (that and my son's medication! )wow, thanks - we're in the beginning stages of all of this too. This really
helped (I'm glad I'm not alone in the way I'm feeling.)

Hello.  My son, age 7, and I are about 4 months into our ADHD diagnosis so I'm pretty new at this too.  I can tell you you should read everything you can.  Do research on the internet, collect information then do what you think is best for your child.  I can also tell you what I did.

At first I was against med's as well but my son's frustration level at school was way over the top.  He'd be given an assignment to do, write his name on it, then stare out the window.  He did nothing, felt like a failure and lost all confidence in himself.  I'll also say that my father, age 67 now, hated school from the first grade.  I have 1 brother who is 36 that was actually on medication when he was 7 or 8 and another brother who is 40 that hated everything about school.  Out of the 3 only 1 was ever diagnosed with anything, because it was so long ago, and the 1 that was they called hyperactive.  Having said that, I wanted more for my son than to go to school every day hating it.  I decided on medication, for now, because of his age and because I needed results immediately, before he got in the same boat as my brothers and father.  I'm trying not to look at it as a "forever" thing.  The medication has given him the ability to focus and now, in the 2nd grade, he's learning the study skills he should've started to learn in kindergarten.  It's my hope that eventually he can learn to train himself to focus.  We've changed med's twice and the second one has seemed to be working for the last 2 months.  The first one made him lose his temper quickly so we changed to something different within the first month.  However, the first time he went to school on ANY medication, he came home with a huge smile saying "I DID IT MOM!"  His self-esteem and confidence level shot through the roof on the very first day.

Martial arts seemed to save my youngest brother.  It provided him discipline and focus.  I've spoken to a couple of specialists about it.  They confirmed what my mother stumbled upon by accident.  Martial arts seems to be helpful to children with ADHD.

I also did a lot of research on vitamins.  Our doctor and I decided on some vitamins rich in Omega-3 and about 1/4 of an energy drink every morning, rich in B vitamins.  Both reportedly help with focus. I'm lucky because my doctor is open to many things.  He admits that there are things he doesn't know about vitamins and nutrition but is wiling to look at the research I print out and bring in.  Together we decide what can't hurt to try.

My son's teacher and principle are absolutely fantastic as well.  They worked really hard to get him into Special Ed at school.  They've tested him in class.  As a for instance, he'll get 3 out of 11 correct.  They'll give him the same test, an hour later in Special Ed where there's less distraction and he'll get 9 our of 11.  They have someone monitoring his eatting habits as well.  They know if he loses more than 1 1/2 pounds he'll have to come off his med's. I get a little coupon home every day telling me how much of his snack he eats and the lunch ladies won't let him out of the lunch room without eatting most of his lunch.  I have to say, the school system here in MN has been outstanding in their support.  I'm a single parent so I really do need all the support I can get. 

I was very lost, just like you but the people on this message board are wonderfully supportative and have given me invaluable advice.  I have a problem or an issue, I post it and get many repsonses of what THEY did.  I weed through it all, find a couple that make the most sense to me and speak to our doctor about it.

The decisions I've made certainly aren't what every single other parent has done for their child.  Maybe they aren't even the correct decisions but so far it's working for us.

Do the research, be strong, be determined and don't get overwhelmed.  You can do it!