Asking for help | ADHD Information

I didn't realize that too much exercise can do more harm
than good. We don't really have specialists where I
live, so I'm pretty much stuck with an old-fashioned
pediatrician. It didn't even occur to me that my advice
might be inappropriate. Thank you to the moderator for
that reminder.

That said, the OT is for the sensory integration issues.
These exercises we do are geared mainly toward that end.
It helps to keep the blahs/breakdowns from taking over
after the letdown of school getting out. Transitions are
very difficult for my DS.

I never thought about it in the context of anxiety. I
think that would be a whole other issue. I hope you get
some good feedback from the psych. Let us know what you
find out!Another bad night. She complained of leg pains (perhaps growing pains)
which she has had for several years. I gave her tylenol. She took a bath
for 30 min. When she layed down to go to sleep, had the "jitters". I could
not do anything to help her. I am at odds with my husband, who thinks
this is just manipulation. However, he does not look at the whole picture.
She has this feeling plenty of times that has prevented her from doing
something she enjoys, so what's the manipulation in that? I tried to force
her to take deep breaths, figuring if it's anxiety she would calm down, but
she couldn't do it. I kept calm for a LONG time, but then I lost my
temper, went downstairs and screamed bloody murder and cried. I feel
like I'm going crazy! Then she felt she was a "bad" kid. I feel so guilty for
not being able to keep myself calm. I have an appointment on the 23rd
and it can't come soon enough! Thanks for all the advice. I'll give it a try.
PS: she is not taking any meds on a regular basis but fish oil. mamamia40218.1746296296

OneOrTheOther wrote:
I didn't realize that too much exercise can do more harm
than good

Thank you so much for sharing what works for your child. Sharing information is how we learn to make informed decisions for our children. Again, thanks for your input

Luvmykids0240218.3128472222

mamamia,

I know we are only moms here and not drs, but what you have described sure sounds like my son who has ADHD and anxiety.   He has always had anxiety, but it worsened when we moved and then got even worse when he was put with a 3rd grade teacher that didn't seem to care.  He started having panic attacks before school and cried himself to sleep at night if I didn't sleep with him.  Meds have helped, but not totally eliminated the symptoms.  We tried talk therapy, but at that point he was not willing to LET it help.  I probably did the wrong thing and gave him and started homeschooling him.  Everywhere we go (Sunday School, Awanas, etc) he has to have a "safe person".

I hope you have a positive experience at your dr visit.  If you do not feel comfortable with what they have to say....get a second opinion.

I know what you are going through as a parent and I too just want to scream!

 

We have our first appointment on the 23rd.  While at first I suspected perhaps low blood sugar or caffeine, I now believe it is anxiety.  Math is difficult for her and while doing her homework she got aggitated (not unusual) and then felt "jittery".  An hour later - full blown crying, asking for help, growling, moving from being crunched in corner to bed to bathroom (she describes the feeling as jittery).  I would stand on my head if it would help, but nothing helps.  Trying to hold her makes her skin crawl and she often runs away, only to beg for you again shortly after.  It is heartbreaking to watch.  I've been giving her melatonin about 1.5 hrs before bed so at least she is falling asleep easy.  When she is not feeling jittery she is a delight - happy, easy going.  It is worse during the evening.  Next week we have off of school so I'm hoping she will be less stressed.  I'll let you know what happens after our 1st appointment and thanks, thanks, thanks for the support!

The psychologist told us that nights are worse because they associate going to sleep with waking up the next morning to repeating the stressful activity again (school).

Are the afternoons immediately after school the best?  Or perhaps Sat. mornings when she knows she has two days off?  If she doesn't exhibit these actions next week during the break it will be a good indication that she is stressed about school and/or seperating from you.

Keep us posted.

 

I just had another thought...Is it possible that she has sensory processing problems?  If she's having sensitity to touch, sound, etc then it can make her very anxious! Before OT, my son would have a complete meltdown over something like the stop light changed from red to green!   Something about the traffic light at that particular moment was like nails on a chalkboard to him. I thought of this when you said "crunched in a corner".  There were times when sound would bug my son so much he would try to wedge himself behind furniture to make himself feel better.  It would literally put him in "fight or flight".  With my son, I think the sensory and the anxiety go hand and hand.

My son was very similar to the sounds of yours and he has been disagnosed with Add and Anxiety, we have been in therapy for anxiety for the past four years, off and on.  It is true, I believe that for some children that do have a difficult time falling asleep are in a way trying to avoid the situation the next day.  I do feel so sorry for you and for her, to have those feelings are horrible.  One thing we do at our house is, we have made a "worry box" and when my son starts to get nervous before school or about really any situation, he opens the box "blows" his worry into it and then closes the lid, the worries are now gone, period.  He sometimes like to pretend to throw the worries to me or out the window, just to "feel" like they were gone.  Talking through and "role playing" the bedtime routine, or any routine, during a time that she is not anxious can also be helpful. Reading with her some book about "worries" and other facial expressions, have helped us as well.  Panic attacks typically happen "out of the blue" but she may be working herself up so much at night that this is leading to an attack.  Lastly, the number one thing that has helped my eight year old and myself, is Yoga, I can not stress to anyone how this has helped with anxiety and worries.  Even if it is for just a few minutes a day, just having her experience the feeling of realxing, I don't think a lot of children with add/anxiety, etc. exxperience that woderful feeling often enough.  Good luck.  Just another note, reward systems are also a great idea, the idea of, "if you do this, you can earn this" also works for us, my son needs to feel he is in control of a situation.  Good luck again.Logan'smom - yes she does have sensory problems. From years 4-7
getting dressed often lead to a tantrum. Sneakers and socks were a
nightmare. After giving her fish oil, these clothes issues rarely come up,
which makes me think that the fish oil had something to do with it. I'm still
a bit upset with the psychologist who evaluated her and diagnosed adhd
because when I asked about OT he said OT may help with sensory but he
believes it helps because the child gets more attention, not the OT. He
discouraged me from trying this. I've read so many on this site that have
said how much OT helped so after hearing that from him I wrote him off.
My new appointment is with a woman I heard great things about.

Did you ever get the call back from the child psychologist/psychiatrist?

I would call for an evaluation. This way you will know what it is. She could have adhd, a mild form of it, as well as anxiety, but who knows. You will feel better once the results come in and you can help her knowing exactly what it is.

My daughter is 10 going on 11 in 9 days. She too had growing pains for several years. She would cry and cry. DD was recently diagnosed as moderately adhd, I also know there is anxiety and no learning disabilities. I completely understand.

Please post us what is happening with your family. We are here when you need us!!

My daughter is 8 yrs old and having some strange symptoms. Some
history: She was diagnosed with adhd in the summer. She has trouble
with attention at school. She is hyper but not so much so that it is a
problem. She raises her hand in school and does not blurt out. She is
anxious and takes fish oil which has helped her mood. She used to cry
many nights saying she was weird and no one liked her, but this has gone
away since taking fish oil. New situations still make her very nervous and
she might cling to me and cry. I've tried to be tough and demand she do
it, and have tried to be understanding. Being tough just seems to make
her a bigger mess.    
The strange symptom:   she gets this restless, fidgety feeling inside,
many times at night about an hour or two before bedtime. She says she
needs to wrestle with us or do some other type of physical exercise to
feel better. My husband and I are often tired at this point, but I often will
do it.   My husband and I are at odds. He thinks she is manipulating us,
perhaps to get us to play with her or not go to bed. I do not. She tells
me that she can't stand the feelings she's having, scratches her legs, begs
for me to help her, but when it gets really bad she cringes when I touch
her and runs from me, only to call me into her room shortly after begging
me to help her feel better. If I ignore her she will hyperventilate. This last
about 30 minutes, and afterwards she is still on edge. Tonight I gave her
0.5 mg melatonin 1.5 hrs before bedtime since last night was so difficult
and she was up late and then slept late. I knew she would have trouble
falling asleep tonight since she slept late.   She again felt bad and wanted
to wrestle about 7:00 at night, bedtime being 8:30.   Although this is
what she always ask for when feeling bad, she is overly sensitive and gets
"hurt" easily which leads to crying. We have a small house and VERY
small yard, so it's hard to find ways for her to expend energy. I
suggested a bath and played barbies with her while she soaked in the
tub, and this made her feel better, but maybe it was the melatonin
kicking in, although a bath did help her once before. She was very
relaxed after the bath and fell asleep easy. She needs me to lay with her
to sleep. She has always been very attached to me, even though I've
worked and her grandparents watched her during the day years 0-5. She
was the only kid in Kindergarten who cried everyday when I dropped her
off for the first 6 months, and even cried sometimes in 1st and 2nd
grade. I'm not the overprotective type, having no problem having her
take the school bus to a friends after school or swim at a friends for a
play date, and this she usually does ok with. However, I am different
than my husband, being that when she is so distressed I can't make her
tough it out because her behavior just seems so strange to me.    When
she is an emotional wreck and she ask me to help, it kills me that I don't
know what to do to help her feel better. I tried teaching her breathing
techniques to calm down, or massage, but she says this makes her feel
worse. We've tried eliminating sugar and caffeine, but these "episodes"
still happen. What can this be? Is it anxiety? I've called a child
psychiatrist (or physcologist- not sure which) and am waiting for a call
back.I have an OT that comes to the house for my younger son. She describes her kids and her husband as needing to get their yayas, or they just can't function. By this, she means really intense exercise. Either a treadmill, or bike-ride, or jumping jacks, etc. I too find that my ADHDer does much better if he is allowed to get the yaya's out of his system, especially in the hours between school and dinner. It's hard in the winter, when we pretty much have to stay indoors, but it is worth it in the long run.

I like to put on music, and have a 30 min. dance party. I also love to get out the stop watch and see how long he can "hold up the wall" or do short sprints from couch to bathroom door and back, etc. You can even up it to more "laps" and have her race her own times. Another way to participate without having to join in, is lie on the floor and have her jump over your legs or arms. Any sort of physical outlet is great. The game HyperDash is good for tired parents, because you can set up the cups so that the kids have to run like crazy, but with your long arms and legs you don't have to go far!!!

It may seem counterproductive, but when my kiddo is hyped-up I actually try and get him more hyper for a little bit to burn off some of that energy, then I do a bath or shower to calm him down. It's always a tricky balance, though. Hope you find something that works for your family! Your doing the right thing calling the doctor because only a professional can determine what's going on. What you describe sounds anxiety driven but again, the doctor will make that determination. Very often ADHD does not stand alone so your child could very well have an anxiety disorder as well.  For the child with ADHD, too much exercise over stimulates the child so all that activity can do them more harm than good, especially if the child is also suffering from anxiety issues. Your child is crying out for help. No child likes to get in trouble or feel scared and she cant be disciplined out of what she cant control. The poor child is terrified and needs to be comforted and feel that her home is a safe place to fall.   Please let us know what's going on. We are here to help

It sounds like it could be anxiety but definitely talk to the doctor about it to make sure.  Does she take any other medications besides fish oil and melatonin?  If it is anxiety then excercise can help a lot.  My son also sees and occupational therapist and we do some of the same excercises at home.  We have one of those small trampolines and he can bounce on it by himself.  Also, we have a large blow up pilates exercise ball and he bounces on that.  I usually hold it steady against the couch with my legs and hold his hands as he jumps up and down on it. 

Another thing we do is have an "activity pocket".  It's a folder with three velcro pieces on the outside.  I printed out pictures/drawings from the internet of someone doing jumping jacks, pushups, and running in place and laminated them.  I velcro each of these to the pieces of velcro on the outside of the folder.  Then I tell him to do the activities on the pocket (folder) and when he's completed the activity he gets to take the picture off and put it in the pocket then move to the next one.  The order changes a lot. He likes this because he is doing physical things and it's like a game.  He likes the visual "chart" and being able to pull the picture off and put it away when he's done.  Something about actually being able to see the activity and moving it once it's done...it works for him.  You might want to give it a try because you don't have to participate!  

I'm glad you're seeing someone else!  I can't believe that doc would say that OT only works because the child gets attention!  You may want to think about an evaluation by an OT.  Occupational Therapy may help if some of the tamtrums are from sensory problems!  Good luck!