Please help. | ADHD Information
I'm sorry but I just HAVE to interject a different opinion than SaveChildren here!
SaveChildren said "I don't know of any happy stories of parents after using prescription medications, because there are so much associated side effects."
If you have truly never heard of any happy stories, then you haven't talked to many people!
SaveChildren also said "But you sure can get lots of happy stories of parents using the natural medication and getting wonderful results. Not only are their child's ADHD under control, but they are more relaxed, knowing that their health and future is secure."
I am on these message boards a lot. I talk to many, many people about ADHD (doctors, co-workers, therapists, occupational therapist, friends, family, other parents of ADHDers, etc). I go to a natural therapy support group every month run by an OT and a Naturopathic Doctor and until recently I went to CHADD meetings every month. And I HAVE to say that I hear a "natural success story" once in a while but I would never say I've heard "a lot" of happy stories. I have, however, heard "a lot" of prescription medication success stories and some of them in conjuntion with natural therapies. But not a lot of natural success by itself! I would trust this type of information over random research on the internet any day of the week!
Hey Chels718,
How old is your dd? My adhd 1st grader is also very bright and in an "inclusion class". This is a regular class where there are some students w/learning and/or social/behavoiral problems so there are two teachers. The 2nd teacher is special ed certified and is there to support those kids, but they also help the whole class. The 1st half of day is in the "rescource room" w/the few students (his class has 7) and they do math, reading and writing. It's just better learning for him in a small class environment. Then after lunch w/the "regular" class is science, and social studies, art, phys ed, etc. He has an IEP for all of this.
Is this what your school is pushing for your dd in terms of special ed? I wouldn't know about any of this if we weren't in the middle of it so I hope this helps!
I agree with OneOrTheOther. I treat my daughter's ADHD the same as if she had diabetes and needed medication--I consider ADHD in the same arena. My daughter doesn't have the right brain chemicals to make her act like "normal" kids. The more ADHD is out there and has a face and an advocate, the better it is.
Chels718, I find that most people who react the way your brother did are just uneducated about ADHD. Maybe he should come to this board and read some...it may be an eye opener for him. Some people will just never get it and they should thank their lucky stars! Because that means they DON'T have an ADHD kid! Also, the people that didn't believe in meds only have to be around my child for about an hour unmedicated then one hour medicated to see that it really IS NECESSARY!!! It makes a believer out of people!
My son is in special education but he's only in preschool. Here in Florida we have a state paid preschool so my son goes to public school. He tried a regular class first (before meds) and he couldn't do it! Since then he started taking meds so the school is doing a re-eval to see if he still needs special ed. I say that special ed is better than the child feeling like a failure everyday because they can't be successful in a regular class! That's how my son was-even at 3 and 4 years old! BUT if the child gets stable on meds then they can probably transition to a regular class. Just my two cents... 
Hi Chels718 and welcome!
I would imagine every parent on this board can relate to how you are feeling. None of us wanted to put our children on medicine, and many of us (myself included) explored many other options with medicine being our last resort. We know we are good parents, we know our child's behavior isn't a result of our parenting, yet we sometimes allow ourselves to feel guilty about medicating. Each night my husband gives himself an insulin injection for his diabetes and each morning I give my son his Focalin for his ADHD.... SAME THING.... medicine being prescribed for a medical condition! The fact that your daughter is doing so much better in school and also socially is probably such a relief to you! Don't let other people's opinions affect you. Nobody knows what this journey is like until they have walked in our shoes. To answer your question about special ed, our son who is in kindergarten has an IEP and is considered special ed, even though in Maryland they mainstream all the students. He also happens to be exceptionally bright, and spends part of the day with the special ed teacher in the 2nd and 3rd grade classrooms to keep his interest going. They also let him go to preK and read stories to the students, which he loves to do. So, "special ed" is not just for kids who are behind...it's for kids who are special in every sense of the word! No, your daughter probably will never be like the "other kids", nor will my son, but once I was at peace with his diagnosis, I then was able to see the unique, beautiful spirit inside him. I wish you the best, and hope all the wonderful parents on this board are as much of a help to you as they have been to me.
I just wanted to add a comment in regards to you taking parenting classes, Please do not think your daughter is like this do to you and your parenting. It is genetic, brain based. She was born with this. There are also others in either your family or her dad's family, or both that have it as well. I wonder about that aunt and uncle, your brother. The comments about you taking drugs while pregnant is not only ignorant, but disgusting. They are certainly uneducated. I wouldn't tell them anything that is going on with your family.
I am glad you are here and surrounded by friends who completely understand and walk in your shoes.
Take care!
Hi,
The problem I have with using diabetes as an example of a condition that would require medication just like ADHD, is that a child won't die without ADHD medication. I believe one of the most important benefits of the ADHD meds is the social sucess. Everyone wants to be socially accepted and this is very important for mental health. The hard thing for some of these ADHD kids is that they "get" that they don't "get it" but can't understand why. The meds help so much with the social aspect which I believe make the meds worth the risk. Without the meds they are very prone to depression and a whole host of other problems.
I don't think anyone was trying to imply that ADHD and diabetes were similar in their severity as medical conditions, just the fact that they both are able to be controlled with medications. It is unfortunate that ADHD medications have a stigma attached to them that medications for other conditions do not. Part of the reason for this is the fact that too many people view ADHD as just a behavioral issue, often misplacing the blame on the parents, thus resulting in the guilt that so many parents feel at the beginning of their medication journey. Kathleen051540224.3536805556
Hi,
I complete agree with you. The stigma drives me crazy (oh my, maybe I am crazy or certainly headed there with two ADHD kids). But, I find with any condition that cannot be seen with lab results, medical imaging, etc., people are very reluctant to prescribe medication. It's just an easier decision for medicating when it's a more socially accepted condition. One cannot deny diabetes, but ADHD is very different. I medicate both children so I am not anti meds, quite the opposite, just feel that most people just don't "get it".
[QUOTE=Chels718]My daughter has been just diagnosed with ADHD. She was going to a charter school and was suspended twice and then finally kicked out. I then put her in a public school. the 2nd day she started there. They told me I had to come down to the school for a meeting or she would not be able to come back in. I was already taking her for therapy once a week and the psych had suggested meds but I was so against it. As time progressed and I kept getting calls from the school and everyday it was just something. Im having such a hard time excepting it for months I kept just thinking it would go away. when I tell you that I am exhausted, Im emotionally burned out. I keep asking Why? What did I do for my daughter to deserve this? Is sh ever going to be normal? I have finally gave in and started the medication. Shes been on it now for two weeks and she's doing great. I should be happy about this but Im not. I dont like that she has to take a drug to control herself. Im reading tons of infomration about adhd and I have signed up for a parenting class as well. What I wanted to know which I cant seem to find anywhere is some happy stories about adhd. Stories where kids were taken of meds and were able to survive and make it. Is there any hope? Or is just medication for the rest of her life? I am so distraught over this and Im having such a hard time accepting it. Any replies would be greatful. Thank You. [/QUOTE]Hello Chels718, Don't lose hope. Your child is going to be alright, you can do some things to save your child from the negative effects of prescription medications. The best option is to go with natural ADHD medicines. I know of one effective natural alternative medicine, that's showing as much or even better results than prescription medications. This is a homeopathic medicine, that acts on the cellular level and works on the root of the ADHD problem. So yes you can possible, root it out completely with this approach, while at the same time nourishing the nerve cells and making the brain more focussed and active.
I don't know of any happy stories of parents after using prescription medications, because there are so much associated side effects. But you sure can get lots of happy stories of parents using the natural medication and getting wonderful results. Not only are their child's ADHD under control, but they are more relaxed, knowing that their health and future is secure.
Hope this helps...
SaveChildren40226.4391782407Troll!
My daughter has been just diagnosed with ADHD. She was going to a charter school and was suspended twice and then finally kicked out. I then put her in a public school. the 2nd day she started there. They told me I had to come down to the school for a meeting or she would not be able to come back in. I was already taking her for therapy once a week and the psych had suggested meds but I was so against it. As time progressed and I kept getting calls from the school and everyday it was just something. Im having such a hard time excepting it for months I kept just thinking it would go away. when I tell you that I am exhausted, Im emotionally burned out. I keep asking Why? What did I do for my daughter to deserve this? Is sh ever going to be normal? I have finally gave in and started the medication. Shes been on it now for two weeks and she's doing great. I should be happy about this but Im not. I dont like that she has to take a drug to control herself. Im reading tons of infomration about adhd and I have signed up for a parenting class as well. What I wanted to know which I cant seem to find anywhere is some happy stories about adhd. Stories where kids were taken of meds and were able to survive and make it. Is there any hope? Or is just medication for the rest of her life? I am so distraught over this and Im having such a hard time accepting it. Any replies would be greatful. Thank You.
Hi,
My heart goes out to you. It's rough I am not going to sugar coat the future. However, medication can be a life saver for many. I wish I didn't medicate my children and I am very private about it. There is such a stigma about the medication issue and most of it is just incorrect and unfair. But, I am not going to change the world's view of medication for children so I just try and help my children succeed. My ds struggles with his ADHD and my dd does just fine with a little bit of medication. DS is on several meds.
Now for the bright side. Both my children are sucessful in school. DS gets mostly B's and few A's in a very competitive private school. DD gets mostly A's in the same school. My DH was diagnosed recently with ADHD and is very successful in life both professionally and personally. He did struggle as a young student and did not hit his stride until getting his Ph.d. He is a very determined person who says that if he had medication early in his life his life would have been much easier.
There is hope and look to this board for great information and support.
hausof, Thank you so very much for that. I really appreciate you taking the time to answer me back. I had mentioned to you know friends and family about the issuses going on and the first thing out everyones mouth is dont give her medication.Easy for them to say because they are not getting the phone calls at work. At work listening in on the phone while you hear your child screaming and throwing things at teachers. sighs
I guess I will just have to get used to it. I did tell my mom about it and she understands. My brother on the other hand screamed at me and honestly I sort of was feeling pretty good about the medication until my conversation with him. he made me feel terrible.
I just need to vent I guess, the medication is working really really well and she actually came home from school the other day and told me. Mom I have more friends now because Im more mature :). Shes too much. MInd you she has no idea shes on meds. I tell her there vitamins.
Im glad this board is here because I cant really discuss it with anyone because people will judge me and get upset with me because shes on medication. Like hellooo I did not want to put her on medication either.
Shes also very bright. They did an evaluation on her and she is above grade level on every test they gave her. That hurts me too because shes so smart. Im like gosh. ARe your children in Special Education? The school is pressuring me to put her in specail Education but I dont want too? But maybe its the best for her? I dont know. This is just all so overwelming.
Hi,
I am pretty adamant about not discussing my children's adhd with anyone except:
1. Teachers (on a need to know basis) or tutors
2. Babysitter (we use one who knows about the medications)
3. Medical personnel (doctors, therapists etc)
4. Parents who have children with ADHD
In our family grandparents don't know of the medication because I can't trust myself from getting upset if they had doubts about my actions. I have been through WAY too much to listen to the uninformed discuss ADHD. I listen to the experts and other parents in my situation.
Really NO ONE ELSE knows anything about this issue and I am not willing to get into a debate/discussion about the validity of medications or ADHD. I have told my children that the reason we do not discuss their medications with others is that it is private and some children might make fun of them. For example, I have heard that children will say to those on medication "go take your chill pill." My medical information is private and so should my children's.
My children are now 13 and 11 and are completely on board with the medication. They both know it is very helpful with their focus. The meds have helped their social life as well.
My children are not in special ed. Their school does not offer it and most children at the school test in the 90 percentile. It's a very good college prep school and they are doing great.
This board will be a great source of comfort for you and know you are not alone.
hausof440218.5693287037Thank You very much for the information! I agree with everything you have stated. I agree and I disagree. I want ADHD to be out there. I want to get rid of the bad rep that it has had for so long. I think it should have as much coverage as autism or Down syndrome. It is so much more acceptable for people to admit they have depression or anxiety, even personal things like ED or PMS are acceptable...if you look at the number of ads put out by the pharma companies.So why is it that ADHD is still a closet issue? I talk about it freely with everyone who will listen. And I repeatedly get the same responses. Their eyes turn away, or they give me a pity look, or my personal pet-peeve...the look of disgust, as if my parenting is responsible.
I had an uncle tell my aunt that I probably did drugs while I was pregnant. This is absolutely the meanest thing I have ever heard said about me. Not to mention, completely unfounded.
I am not really an organized person, but if I could, I would try and get ADHD education out there...starting with educators. These are the people teaching our children, and I've found very few have any real understanding of the complexities of ADHD.
Ok, that's my rant. I love that all of you are here on this board. It really helps to have other parents to turn to who understand the dificulties involved with raising a child who has ADHD. Thanks to all of you for just being here!