A Sibling Question | ADHD Information

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Hi Matt's mom...I suggest that you speak to both boys together and explain that everyone has different interests and just because one person is not interested in something that someone else is interested doesn't make the interest stupid. Stress the point that it is our individual interests that make us unique or special. Matt may feel he is not good at things and fears rejection. Medication is just one tool but once medication makes your child see his full potential, that will raise his self esteem but all these issues have to be worked on in combination with medication. Hang it there. It takes time.

I feel bad even writing this question but I truly have no idea how to handle this situation.  As some of you know, we just put Matt(age 8) on Focalin 10mg a few weeks ago and have had success with it.  

That being said, before medication getting him involved with anything outside of the home has been next to impossible.  We've tried various sports without success.  He even asked to try an art class and then refused to attend.  Even now AFTER medication, he is still timid about trying anything.

Now for the problem............his little brother who is 5 and does not have adhd idolizes his big brother.  And the little guy wants to try baseball, soccer, etc, but won't because his big brother says "it's stupid".   I've talked to Matt privately about keeping his negative thoughts to himself, but we are still working on that skill. 

My question...........how do I tell my youngest that what his older brother is doing is "not quite right" without being disrespectful of Matt.   I can't just say that Matt's choices aren't always the best, or he's almost always negative about everything,or it's his ADHD etc.  I would love to see Matt involved in more than just hanging out around the house with his brother and playing video games.  I really don't know how to handle the "negative" influence of adhd. 

Matt is a good boy and a wonderful, caring protective older brother.  I don't want to ruin this relationship that will last a lifetime. 

Thanks so much for any thoughts.

Andrea

 

Matt's mom40232.255474537