New Here and to ADHD...Help Please.
I thought he was doin good in school but his teachers said that was because they had to stand over him the whole time cause if they walked away he would get destracted very quick. She said he struggles greatly with paying attention and he is impulsive and makes wrong choices which get him into trouble many times during the day. He is very forgetful Thats not just at school its at home to. I have heard good things about medication and i have heard bad things. My sisters son had to be put on medication and he sat there like a zombie. I just dont know what to do i am very confused.I can totally relate to your concerns. I had exactly the same ones.
I can only tell you my experience, which is that my son made a complete turn around once we found the right medication for him. The right medication at the optimum dosage will bring out the best in your child. The wrong medication, the wrong dosage, etc. may turn your child into someone you don't recognize. It usually takes trial and error until you find the correct dose of the right meds.
All of the parents on this board know how hard it is to make the decision to medicate. This board provides amazing, unwavering support to all who seek it. Hang in there.
What medication is the Dr. recommending? If it is the the right fit for your son, there shouldn't be much change in his personality. Zombie-ism isn't how it should be at all.My son is 6 1/2, and he was just diagnosed this past fall. His teachers (until this year) told me that I just needed to wait, and that when he was (fill in an age here) he would be like a different child. Only, that didn't happen...instead his behaviors seemed to worsen.
This year, it was finally affecting his school work and classroom to the point where it couldn't be denied that something else was going on. Also, he was having aggression problems and was even suspended in the first 5 weeks of school, because it was his fifth write-up for hitting.
Now for the positives and negatives. He hasn't had ONE office referral since we started medications and his grades have sky-rocketed up, but we also haven't found the exact right med yet (he has anxiety and sensory issues along with the ADHD). I think the trick is to stick it out until you come across what works best for your son.
As for your confusion, that is a perfectly normal feeling in the face of what you're dealing with. I practically went through all the stages of grief over the last few months, myself, but I'm hanging in there (sometimes only by my fingernails) and I've found so much support and understanding on this board. It has truly been a mental/emotional life-saver for me. I hope you find it to be the same. Best wishes.
Thank both of you for your post. It does make a diffrence knowing there are other parents dealing with the same thing and being able to talk to you and read other post! Im glad to know what im feeling is normal. Im gunna hang in there the best i can....Right now i am just so sick to my stomach about it. Still confused about it all. Mostly about the medication thing. Sounds like some kids go through so much just to find the right meds I know the parents do to.
Got a question. I was thinkin if i did decide to go head with the meds I want to start it over a weekend so i can watch him myself for a few days instead of giving it to him and sending him off to school. My Question is.... Is it okay to just give them thier medication just during school days? Not over the weekend or summer or holidays. I plan on calling the Dr in the mornin and talking to him more about it. The medication he was wanting to put him on was concerta i believe.
Thank yall so much for replying to my post. It helped. Thanks
Hi Corrina, I just wanted to comment on your son being special ed/gifted and talented....isn't it great that our kids can get recognized for their accomplishments! Our school district in Maryland participates in a program called "Twice Special" which deals specifically with this type of thing. So often our kids intelligence and talents are overshadowed by behavior issues and I am so happy that our school district offers something like this for our son and others like him. I am wondering if there are many other districts out there that recognize the fact that many "special education" students are special in many ways. Definitely, if there is a personality change, tell the doctor and get a new
med!
There are ways to deal with ADHD without using medications. My son
went a year without them. We did multiple environmental adjustments
that worked great - for a while. I highly suggest that you ask the doctor
what can be done along with medication for your child. I got a 7 page
report from my son's neuropsychologist - it was an expensive battery of
tests, but it was worth it in my opinion. Perhaps further testing could
help in your case.
The diagnosis was probably a huge shock to you. I resisted my son's
diagnosis for quite a while myself. If you can't accept medication as
treatment right now, try other techniques for now and educate yourself
about the medications. Tell the doctor you want to give it 2 months to
set up environmental changes and research medicines.
But please - don't dismiss medication out of hand. It's not an all-or-
nothing choice. Try to have an open mind and learn as much as you can.
Oh, and my son was just accepted into the Gifted and Talented program.
He's the first student in our district who is in Special Education and G&T.
Since he's been medicated he's been able to show the school what his
actual academic level is. He's no longer frustrated that school is so much
easier for his classmates. He's made amazing social leaps. He could have
gotten by without the medication - just like an asthmatic could probably
survive without their meds - but everything is an improved for him now
that he's on his extremely low dose medication (20 mgs Vyvanse), and
he's still the same sweet witty kid he always has been.Hi and welcome! We struggled just as you did about whether or not to start our 6 yr old on meds, and it was reading this board (for hours and hours!) which finally convinced me to do it. Yes, we were afraid of the side effects, but realized that our son's chances of success socially and academically were slim without the medicine. We were lucky that the first medicine we tried (focalin xr 10 mg) worked well for him. The only real downside is his lack of appetite, he will go all day in school without eating but he does have a good dinner and a milkshake with Carnation instant breakfast each night before bed. So far, after 2 1/2 mths he hasn't lost weight. He still has his happy-go-lucky personality, only more controlled. His schoolwork has improved immensely. He was student of the week after the first week on meds, and this month he is student of the month for the whole kindergarten! It's so wonderful to see him so proud of himself, rather than the little boy who is always in trouble. We do not give him meds on days off of school because we want him to eat more on those days and I also found that he seemed a little "flat" on the meds when he is not being stimulated by school activities. This works well for us, but I think there are certain nonstimulant meds that you should not skip days. Hopefully your doctor is experienced in this field because there are SO many different meds and combinations of meds. Good Luck!
If the medication is working properly there should never be zombie like behavior. If it happens then the meds are wrong-either the dose, or timing, or the type. Same with his personality. If it changes his personality for the worse then the meds aren't right.
I agree with Corrina. If this diagnosis was a shock to you then it might be too much of a shock to jump right to medication. There are many other techniques you can try. Research as much as you can about all solutions. Then if you do make the choice to medicate, at least you can feel comfortable that you made an informed decision.
Unfortunately the other techniques never worked for my son and I haven't heard from many people that say the other techniques worked alone. The only thing that worked for my son was medication. It has literally changed his life (and mine!) 
Read this board as much as you can. There is so much wonderful information here from people who really know. Good luck! 
however, looking back on it today, i am very glad my parents decided to put me on medication. It made a world of difference in my academic ability and behavior.
It's important to realize, as someone has infered to earlier, that ADHD does not effect intelligence levels. You can be highly intelligent but have awful focus... especially on things you deem unimportant.
My medicine made a world of difference to me. Granted, I did not like being labeled as the child that had to medicine, but it had many positive effects...
This board is what convinced me to go forward with meds. I have read and read and have heard so many positive things about it. I never thought i would have ever concidered it because all i ever heard was bad stories about meds. That doesnt mean that im not still worried about it. Probly will be till we find the right meds and dosage. Im still very new to this... But i have done alot of homework. I have learned soooooo much from this board and i thank god for all these parents and all the information on this board!!! This board is such a blessing and i want to thank all of you for the stories and advice and the knowledge to help me learn. THANKS!!!Good luck and please give us an update soon!
Probably you've only heard of horrible things about ADHD too. It's never
black and white - there are always silver linings.
Pay attention to what's going on with your child. There will be side effects -
one of which will be a more focused child. Figure out which ones your
family can live with and what you won't before you start the meds. Expect to
have some adjustment periods - my son had to change medications, then
adjust the dosage of his second med. That's normal. Now he's great!
Best of luck to you!
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