Talking too loud | ADHD Information

the thing is with adhd - we get high. -keep reading -

the next thought gets us high. not stoned or anything - but hyper aware.

we are fast and impatient. re: 'i get it. understood. so basically what
you're saying is ...'

we speak louder to make it understood that we get it - 'go on. i get it. let
me paraphrase ...'

we can't stand silence, stillness, shyness, whispers.

our minds are moving too quickly to process others. therefore we are
loud, aggressive, emotional ...
I agree with you on most points, but one point is changing for me. I typically do no like "silence, stillness", but I am changing on that one. I have been trying to mediate regularly, even if only for a few minutes. Sometimes at work, I will find a quiet room and sit and enjoy the stillnees. That has helped me to relax and not go off on people.

I really enjoy discussions on topic that interest me (which covers about 95% of the known universe), so when I am in an interesting discussion, I get really excited. For me, part of it is definitely 'go on. i get it. let me paraphrase ...' , but also "tell me more!!!"

"our minds are moving too quickly to process others."

That reminds me of the first meeting of my ADD group. There were five of us plus a representative of the city (they were sponsoring the group) and we were taking back and forth across the the table,  and there were at least three different conversations going on, although it seemed like all five of us were involved in all of them. It was pretty loud and lively. Afterwards the lady from the city said that she was trully amazed that we not only carried on so many conversations at once, but we could keep track of them all.
The issue of voice volume has always been a sensitive topic for me.  As a child, my family would tell me to lower my voice.  Even as an adult, I can't tell you how many times people will be rude and tell me i'm too loud.  that's just me.  i can't change it.  why can't people just accept that part of me?  it doesn't matter if it's ADHD based (which in my case it probably is).  I get excited about something and I talk louder.  If there's other noise around, I need to hear myself so I talk louder.  No, I don't have a hearing problem.  It's such a stigma that women should be soft spoken, demure, mousey.  I am none of those.  I am boisterous, I have a deeper voice and it's loud.  Too flippin bad that I don't fit into the mold!

So, be okay with your loudness.  It's who you are and if other people can't accept it, then it's their problem.  I have worked so hard at being quieter but it just doesn't work because it's not who I am.  I doubt you'll be fired for the volume of your voice.  That's how I make myself feel better.
I understand what you are saying. I accept the fact that being loud is part of who I am, but with four other people in the room being as loud as I am is a problem. Perhaps I won't get fired, but if multiple co-workers see me as a "problem" no matter the reason it does create issues. Further, it can be considered a sign of disrespect since I would not be considerate of their wishes/needs by simply being as loud as I want. (or typically am)  If special projects come up, it is just possible that I won't get chosen. The boss does not need to justify decisions on that level to anyone, but can base them on the fact HE is bothered by my loud voice. (as well as others) jimmo - i understand what you're saying.  I have had to make a conscious effort to be quieter in the workplace.  I mean I've had to actually hyperfocus on it.  If you really work at it, you can improve.  It takes ALOT of practice!  Most of the time it's not a problem for me (the volume) but when it is (and someone says something), I could fall apart like a cracker. 

It's frustrating to know that people WILL pass judgment on us based on our voice.  Have you talked to your boss about it and how this is part of who you are?  You can tell him that you will work on it but that you will have moments of loudness.

Good luck to you!
Yes, I have talked to my boss about my ADD and he has been very patient about it. Unfortunately, the loudness is just one of several ADD issues. He is very much aware of the fact I am "working on my issues". In fact, I am currently managing a special project and he said giving me this project is in recognition of the fact that I have made dramatic improvements over the last couple of years. The loudness is just one area where I need to change.

As a matter of fact, my wife has also commented (read: complained) that I am too loud. She accepts it as part of my ADD, but she cringes everytime we are in public or visiting people and I get too loud.

I trully look at the loudness (at all of my ADD characteristics) as part of who I am. I AM ADD. I do not "have" ADD. However, there are certain aspects that people perceive negatively. On the other hand, one of my "good" ADD traits is brainstorming, coupled with tenacity. (some called it "stubbornness")  Part of this project I am managing is because of these traits. (my boss has also said it would be nice if others could brainstorm like me)

I have thought about it many times and despite the problems, I would not want to be any different. I am ADD. ADD is me.


An interesting idea. If I recorded while in a discussion with other people, I would get a feeling for the relative volume. I was also thinking that if I am simply aware of recording it, I would be more conscious of the problem and can turn down the volume as it happens. Typically I am not really aware of it until someone points it out. So the simple fact that I am aware of it while the conversation is happening (and not afterwards) is a good thing. How about recording your voice? You know like practicing
talking in a conversation in your room and tape it so you
can know how loud you sound.

Hi All!

One ADHD related problem that I am working on is talking too loud. When a co-worker points it out to me that I am too loud, it is obvious to me that I was too loud. Now, I am working on trying to identify being too loud before one of my co-workers gets annoyed. Does anyone have any tips about keeping this under control? I would be grateful for any ideas.

regards,

jimmo