The situation your son is going through reminds me of something our son's paraprofessional told us last year when he was in pre K. She has a 24 yr old son who has Asperger's and she said we (as a family) have to be there for our kids unconditionally. They need us to make them feel so secure, special, important, etc because of what they are going to go through socially. Not that parents shouldn't do that with any child, but it is especially important for ours.
I agree, no amount of reminders or explaining is going to stop our kids from doing this. The fact that they "don't get" that some kids shun them is a good thing....our feelings as parents probably are hurt worse than our kids!
Guess we just need to continue to be warriors for our kids, and to be there to pick up the pieces when they fall. And as hard as it is, I would rather be a parent of a loving, friendly, sweet spirited little boy than a parent of a bully!
Our ds does that too. The only advice we could give is too be there for him when he realize that the "bully" is not going to come around. You can talk till your blue in the face to your adhd child and remember were adults and do not understand what it's like being a kid. But that goes for all kids. lol.
My son has been bullied mercilessly all year by a kid at school (a kid heI don't know what you can do...but, I have the same issue with my son. On the ice skating rink..he chases after the older boys. When I ask him what they were saying he says they were telling him to get away from them. When I ask him to get away from them he says..No they were just being silly. Our neighborhood bully "Brock" arrives in the yard after hitting my son with a stick...and DS still wants to be his friend. At church, I have kid after kid after kid coming to me telling me what my son is doing..and I can not get my DS away from these kids.
My son has always been one that joins another family whenever we go somewhere...he heads right over and plays with the little kids, talks to the parents, chats away with the teenagers (he just turned 7). In restaurants he is impossible to keep at our table..until the food comes. It drives us crazy. He worms his way into families and takes over. At the pool, he jumps in between the kids and their parents... or joins the dive team going off the diving board. He is the only little kid I know that behaves this way.
I feel your pain..but I am at a complete loss as to what we can do. My son has no social boundaries. He wants to play tickle and wrestle with senior citizens. He heads onto the soccer field to join the team playing. He is never shy or hesitant about going right in the middle of things. I ask him to come back and he won't..without a battle..ugh!
you all may remember my posting last year about the boy in my sons class that lived in my subdivision and bullies him. We spoke with the parents and nothing happenned until we got the principle involved. Anyway, this year, my son continues to try to be friends with this child and I am at my wits end.
Every day when they get off the bus, my son says hello to this child even though he blatantly ignores him and tries to seperate him from the other kids on a regular basis. This child even had the nerve to come to my door after he shunned my child two days ago to ask that we send out the neighbor child who was inside my home playing. They didnt want my kids, just the neighbor child.
Today, I took my kids to the pool. There was hardly anyone there but, there was the nasty kid with his 6 year old brother and a friend. I could clearly hear this child say "OMG, here comes xxxxxxx, run". The mother of these kids heard it and said nothing. I warned my child to play with his brother and stay away from this kid but, I kept having to call him over and eventually put him in time out!!!!! HE WOULD NOT LEAVE THAT KID ALONE!!!!!! In the end, I called my kids over and told them we were leaving.
With this statement, that mother turns around and says " oh, how are you?" and we started up a conversation. I walked over to her and as soon as that little brat saw me talking to his mother, he became scared that I was telling her about his behavior and he swam right over and actually said hello to my son for the first time in weeks. Why wont my son leave this child alone? He tried so hard to be friends with him and it is killing me that he is like a dog going back for more abuse!!! What can I do?