Hello again - apparently when your ADHD child is around the ages - 7-10 you are on here more it seems- well at least I am.
My son, now 11 and ADHD, is doing quite well but my daughter, 9, is driving me batty. She is ADHD impulsive so I know I have to adjust my parenting and reactions to her behavior but the lying has gotten so bad I just don't know what to do.
My son lied a lot then too but he just got "our rule" about lying pretty early on. Our rule: tell us the truth, no consquences we will talk about it. Lie = consequence. It is that simple. It has been the rule in our house for 4 years now but my daughter just doesn't seem to get it.
She is also becoming sneaky and trying to get away with things. I catch her and she blames someone else, lies, blah, blah...
Today - she wore jeans to school - They have uniforms. Her jeans were very dark blue = same color as uniform. She did everything she could to hide the fact that she was wearing them this am. She put high boots on and tucked them in. She work a long shirt, she wore a long colorful scarf that covered her legs, She tied a sweater around her waist. (none of this is her normal outfit)
Right before we got in the car I told her to put the sweater on since it was cold. She did with a table in front of her so I couldn't see her legs. She rode in the backseat.
Finally, I saw she was wearing them when she walked into the school. I went home and got her uniform and went back to the school.
I asked her the rules about jeans and school. She stared at me then a few minutes later said with a question "they aren't allowed?" (fyi she has been going to this school for 3 years now) Then she said that I saw she was wearing them and didn't say anything. I just told her to stop speaking because it was just more lies.
Yes, I know this is a ridiculus story but it was the straw that broke the camel's back.
What do you do when a child lies all the time and then becomes so defiant? I am worried about when the teenage years arrive if this her behavior now.
I don't mind indepence or wanting to be an individual but
Help! Advice!
My grandson (11) is also ADHD-impulsive and his lying drives me crazy. I think it is mostly an impulsive act for them - they do it without even thinking about the consequences or about how much better it would be to tell the truth. I give him a consequence every time he lies. In addition, he wants texting added to his cellphone. I told him that he would have to go 6 months without a lie in order to get it. Each time he lies, I reset the "texting calendar." He is not lying as often as he used to, but he has not yet been able to kick the habit.