First Fist Fight was today!!!! | ADHD Information

I am proud of my son for facing his fears. While I do not condone
fighting, this bully has tried and on several occasion separated my
child from the kids in the neighborhood. So while they are outside
playing, he is inside alone. I am hoping that, in one swoop, this child
will have learned to leave mine alone and the kids might have learned
that even if they dont like my child, it is not a good idea to pick on him
as he will defend himself.

As far as teaching my child another way,my son has ignored this
child,
put up with his taunts and bullying for 3 years before he hurt him. So
yes, I am very proud!!!!!longsally40613.3386342593 [QUOTE=longsally]Now, here is where the story gets interesting. My son started to cry at home. When I asked him if he was hurt, he said no but was upset because
as he put it " he doesn't like to hurt other people" and all he ever wanted
to be was this kids friend. I explained that maybe, this would make them
friends now, or maybe, he might have to fight again. Either way, I was so
proud of him for finally standing up to this child, I could have cried.[/QUOTE]

I applaud your son for standing up to these bullies, because that is exactly what he did.  His reaction when he came home, is an indication that he does not want to stoop to their level; however, he had to do something to end the constant harassment.  Good for him!
Thank you Granny. That is basically what happened. Because he never
stood up for himself in the past, he was seen as a constant target and it
had to come to an end.

In the end, I have been the one standing at the bus stop for the last 3
years making sure my child makes it home without incident. Today, that
mother had to do it!!!! I made sure that when a comment was made by
someone else at the bus stop to say very loudly so I knew the mother
heard me that her child deserved what he got. We have spoken to them
directly in the past, the school has interceded before also without any
change in this child's behavior.

On a side note, this child made arrangements with all the kids to come
and play with him after school, leaving my son out again by himself. My
child interceeded, asking the kids to play with him and they did, all
afternoon, leaving the bully with his brother in their house for the day.
Lets see how they like it!Good for him! I'm not big on fighting, but when the bully won't stop and the adult in the bully's life won't see it, it's on. That kid would never have stopped and the other kids would have gotten the idea that your son is the one to bully. I agree that other options should be tried first, but you can't control what the other kid's parents aren't doing to straighten that kid out. Now he knows that his crap won't fly. Good for your son.I know you feel like this is the only option you have left, but are you still
looking for other outlets for him? Seriously, if he's not doing it, it might be
a good time for therapy.

I'm very pro-therapy. My son made such huge progress, I'm sure it's one of
the reasons he was able to come off his meds.

How's he doing now? Any more interactions with the bullies?Corrina, he is in therapy now, every Tuesday, I think that is what finally gave
him the courage, after 3 years to stand up to this kid.

BPQW, that child's parents think their kids are angels and do NOTHING to
curb their behavior. WE have spoken to them in the past, they have been
called into the school as well without change in their behaviorToday my son had his first real fist fight.

The child in question and his brother are a constant source of aggravation
for me. The older child bullied my child in second grade to the point
where the father had to be called into the office and the child severely
reprimanded. He bullies him on the bus, he bullies him in the
neighborhood. He told my child that our family was sh*t and that he
"spoke" to his father( a principal at a local middle school) and made sure
my children would never go there as he arranged it with his dad.

The younger child is worse than the older one, using language that, if I
ever heard it coming out of my child's mouth, I would use soap to teach
him a lesson. He hit my child in the face before with a football, a vicious
blow that I witnessed and is taking after his older brother.

The parents tell everyone what angels their kids are and seem oblivious to
what is going on. So, back to what happened today.

The kids were up the street playing when the younger child called my son
stupid and other names. My son returned the compliment using foul
language. With that, the two of them told my child to go home. He came
home and was very mad, He decided that he had enough of the bullying
and went back up the street and in front of SEVERAL children, busted that
little brat right in the mouth. When the other child somehow got him in a
head lock, he bit him until he let go. Several witnesses confirmed that the
other child swung and missed every time but my sons punches and kicks
all landed!!!!

So, how did this end? The bully child was crying, put up his hands and
said " I don't want any trouble" ( funny he should decide that now after 3
years of crap) and the younger son ran in to get his father, who called the
kid inside. My son walked home triumphant.

Now, here is where the story gets interesting. My son started to cry at
home. When I asked him if he was hurt, he said no but was upset because
as he put it " he doesn't like to hurt other people" and all he ever wanted
to be was this kids friend. I explained that maybe, this would make them
friends now, or maybe, he might have to fight again. Either way, I was so
proud of him for finally standing up to this child, I could have cried.He did act out of character but I believe that is why he was such an
easy target. Because he NEVER stood up for himself at school or at
home, all the kids saw him that way and no one else wanted the
bully's attention so they all followed along. Since the fight, the
dynamics have shifted for sure. The only thing I am disappointed
about is I had hoped that after the fight, they might have made friends.
The bully's parents have now decided that they don't want their
precious child around mine and have instructed him to not be where
mine is. So, if mine is outside playing, he cannot come down the
street and join in, pretty good for us. Good for him. If the adults failed to stop it and the bully is relentless, this is
definitely a viable response. He learned to stand up for himself. Let's hope he
doesn't have to do it again. He very well have stopped this kid's forward
momentum as the stereotype bully.Hi, it really seems like your 10 yr old had to act completely out of character
before he got anywhere with the bullying. He must have been battling with a
need for connection and love vs significance. I hope the therapist is helping
him put it all into context.Update: The bully has NOT learned his lesson yet!! My son got ill after the
fight and has been home since last friday. My younger son got off the bus
and the bully and his brother were picking on him today and teasing him.
My older son is returning to school tomorrow and he says he will take care of
it if they say anything to him or his brother. This should be interesting and I
will update tomorrow if anything does occur.