Is this a symptom? | ADHD Information

I have been trying to help my son (age 42) get his life on track. Several years ago he was diagnosed as Bi-Polar and has been on-and-off various medications (not too successfully). Two years ago he successfully made it through a detox program and has been alcohol-free for 2 years now. He has continued to deal with bi-polar issues and medications. About 8 months ago I arranged to have him living near me so I could try to figure out what is going on (since the alcohol is no longer in the picture this was a possibility).

He has continued on medication for the Bi-Polar, but over these months he has made great strides in controling the "swings" to anger and completely "losing it". He has been able to talk about how he is feeling, reason out why he feels like he does at various times, etc. -- I think one of the main factors is getting the alcohol out of his system.

One of the major conclusions we have come to after talking and searching the internet is that his problem is not Bi-Polar. His problem is ADHD and the Bi-Polar is a result of the ADHD, so primary treatment should be for the ADHD. The only medical care that is available to him is the VA. At his last appointment his Pres. Dr. "supposedly" scheduled him for the ADHD test (we are waiting to hear from them).

My question is this: In addition to procrastination -- just not being able to organize his mind and day-to-day actions -- his biggest complaint is: "It's just too much for my mind!"  I have seen him (when I make too many suggestions or talk about 2 or 3 things in one conversation, or 2 or 3 things 'happen') become agitated, put his fists at the sides of his head and grimace and say "It hurts my head -- my head is just ringing -- it is just too much to think about!" And he is serious -- he seems to actually be in agony. But he will say I just need some time, then he will take a couple of hours to get calmed down and be ready to try again. But this happens so often it pretty much keeps him from functioning.

Is this an ADHD symptom, or is it a Bi-Polar symptom? Any input would be very much appreciated. His VA doctor (a new one for him) isn't easy to talk to. We are going to try to get an old one back which should be better. But as I said I would like to hear if this is something others have experienced.

Thanks so much!
Marian

 

ADHD normally shows up before age 7.  Being his mother, you have first hand a account. 

I'm obviously not an expert (and I don't know your son) but here's my 2 cents...

I've had that feeling of being totally overwhelmed many times myself. It's really easy for me to drown in my own head with just the thoughts of what I need to get done/should be doing. I have to tell myself to STOP and just pick one or two things and forget about the rest. If I didn't do that, none of it would get done and I'd be a basket case.

If I have a lot to get done on a day off from work my mom will help coach me (I'm 25 by the way) because I'd never get anything done without someone else to break it down into little bits for me.

To OPEN YOUR EYES: Yes, when he was in grade school "ADHD" was something "new" to be considered. I remember asking a doctor if there was a possibility he had that problem. We were there for some type of routine procedure. He looked at him, sitting there on the edge of the examining table, and said: "No, he isn't hyperactive -- if he was, he couldn't be sitting there quietly, his legs would be bouncing." And that was the end of the diagnosis. I didn't know any better, and evidentally the doctor didn't either.  I'm still learning.  In addition to my son, I have a "bunch" of grandchildren to try to be a 'guiding light' for -- it ain't easy and I'm trying to learn so I can do whatever I can.

SUNIDESUS: Can I assume that your "diagnosos" is ADHD? Does it ever get so bad that you would say your head is "ringing"?

Thanks a bunch!

Marian

 

Marian, I'm not sure if maybe it is an ADHD symptom simply made worse by the bi-polar disorder. My mother was severely clinically depressed (NOT bi-polar), and she always had a hard time dealing with too much at once. She would sometimes physically grab her head and squeal in frustration. Before she was put on meds for the depression, she could barely function at all. I wonder now, though, if my mom also had AD/HD.

I am in the process of getting a diagnosis for ADHD myself (I am a 26 yo F, BTW). I absolutely despise my job. It is all paper work, and mental-type work. I vastly prefer physical labour-type work. If my co-workers come to me with more than two things at once, all the thoughts and processes in my brain seem to jumble up and hit a brick wall. I get extremely frustrated and all I want to do is run away screaming. I don't think my head physically "rings" per se, but yes, it is agonizing. It makes me feel inadequate, it makes me LOOK inadequate to my co-workers and friends, and it just simply doesn't feel nice to have your brain go into shut-down mode.

It sounds like that doctor you saw when your son was a child was pretty ignorant about ADHD. Hyperactive kids ARE capable of sitting still once in a while. When I was in grade school, I used to stand at my desk, or walk in circles around it, rather than SIT at it. But at home I could sit and play a video game for hours on end. I hope your son can get some help with this soon. It really sucks.
  I know bipolar exhibits a  lot fo the symptoms of ADD.  I know ADD  goes  hand in hand  with lots of other issues.  CONGRATULATIONS to your son on not drinking.  THat is a HUGE step.  Once people cross the line into addiction   it is a pretty amazing thing for someone to stop  for a signifigant period of time. I am more likely to be the one  talking about 7 things at once  than the frustrated listener. I  have had times where i was overwhelmed but onyl when it was  3 or 4 people trying to talk to em at once not one person  switching gears  a lot.

Marian - Yeah, I'd be an ADDer (inattentive type) so I don't do the bouncing off the walls constantly moving thing since I don't have the hyperactive part of it.

Can't say that I've ever had my head "ringing", but it sounds reasonable to me that that'd be connected to being overwhelmed. I've gotten better at telling my brain to just STOP over the past year-ish, but if I don't do that I can pretty quickly get to a crying and sobbing point, just emotionally overloaded. That seems kinda similar.

Although there are many similarities between Bi-polar disorder and ADD. I would imagine that one who has bi polar has at least experienced some episodes of mania whether hypo mania or full blown mania for him to have that DX to begin with. I am not a Dr, and I am not a know it all, but Bi polar does not come from ADD they are two distinctly different disorders. These "distictions" often overlap, but that does not  mean one comes from the other. The only reason I am mentioning this to you, is that your son has done really well by refraining from the drinking. It is remarkable, and something to be very proud of. The fact that he is able to take better control of himself, is indicative of controlling the bipolar, not getting rid of it. I feel like you, in that he probably does have both , but  if you are concerned about the Dx of bipolar to such an extent that he slowly gets away from the bipolar meds, it may cause him a lot of unnecessary problems.  Please do not think I am trying to be offensive in any way. Also I would definitely see a physician that I (your son) could talk to, that would address all of my concerns. Good Luck! Your son is lucky to have a loving mother such as yourself, it makes all of the difference in the world.

Thank you all so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences. It is VERY HELPFUL. Knowing there are others out there going through similar issues helps. I look forward to hearing from even more of you.

Marian