Trying to NOT give up:

Is your son seeing a doctor? Is he on medication? If so what does your doctor say?  what ever the case do not give up...Does your work have services like life balance?  it's support with things outside of work.  When your son was in school did you get an advocate for him to help with interpretation with the school?  This is to make sure the school is doing everything in it's power to not "leave your child behind".  Also to ask the school for an individual education plan commomly called here IEP.  Although I am new to ADHD (my son was diagnosed about 2 months ago) I have learned there are a lot of resources out there to protect your son and help your son!

Marcie

Wow, I wish I could help you somehow.  I am a teacher and have had ADD and ADHD children in my classrooms all the time.  I think if you found a day care provider who understood ADHD and knew some of the alternative things they could do to have successful days, it might help.  Do you have family that could provide child care for you? 

Medication almost always helps these kids.  I had a child in my first grade class who had emotional melt downs almost every day.  He would think the whole class was watching him.  He would cry and I would have to send him out of the room or to the office to calm down.  He just couldn't do it with all the kids watching him.  They tested him for ADHD and started medication and he was a totally different kid.  Well, he still was the same personality, but he could do his work and he started to succeed at many subjects.  I taught at a private school that accelerated children.  He won the math contest for the first grade.  I know he would have had a hard time doing that without the help of medication.

I have also tried herbal supplements that really work for me.  I have ADD also.  You could check into that.

I am also investigating the book called Stopping ADHD.  Someone told me that these types of books give parents false hopes, but I don't believe that this book is the same as those.  This is backed by research.  These authors actually have Phds from Purdue University and teach in the education and learning disabilities area.  They believe that when children don't crawl for 6months that a reflex isn't matured and therefore they have problems that are interpreted as ADHD.  It is a radical idea that flies in the face of the ADHD and ADD treatments we are all used to.  But I say, if we don't either prove it or disprove it, then we will never know.  I have read most of the book and it makes so much sense.  I hope that I am not being tricked.  But it was only $15 to buy the book.  And the exercises that are described in the book were complete.  They are not trying to sell anything else.  These women have treated many children and claim that these exercises will develop the reflex and the symptoms go away.  I don't want to give people false hope.  I just want to prove it or disprove it and move on.  Anyway, sorry to go on and on.  I wish you well

Hey Michelle, i know it's not easy doing it by yourself, i am also a single mom of an 11 year old son with adhd, and at times it's just crazy. Do you have any other family or friends that you Can talk to, and maybe help you get in a right direction. I  think you would really regret it if you put your son in one of those schools. What does  your sons doctor suggest? All i can say is I'm here if you need to vent, and hopefully things will work out for you, and that the answers will come fast. Good luck!

Hello-  I am a single parent of a 7 year old son who is ADHD/ODD.  I am at my wits end! 

My son was in a special needs school because of his behaviour & the school only made his exposure to chaos worse. I pulled him out, to homeschool, in which afterwards they sent me expulsion paperwork-

I also work full time, so the homeschooling is in the evenings and weekends.  Now I love the Homeschool part!    but i'm having a terrible time finding someone to care for my child during the day. No one can really handle him when he has his melt downs.  I started with a new childcare provider this week and all week through ups & downs, she said she could handle him....when I picked him up yesterday- she said she needed payment for 4 days and could no longer watch him  -

My parents and I are hardly speaking/they want me to put him in a facility.  I wanting to be sure that I didn't have some "rose colored" glasses on spent the day looking into alternative options.  I'm too poor for facilitys/ called social services and they tell me I make too much (over 19K?!) for them to help me-  I am at my wits end.  I do not want to give up and let my son down. But now I'm putting my job in jepardy because I had to take unexpected vacation to be with my son. 

I feel like the 'perfect answers' are only there for the privledged.

The doctors tell me if I don't "nip this in the bud" that my son's adhd/odd will grow in to conduct disorder. 

Sorry- this is a little longer than I intended....I just love my son so much, I don't know what in the world to do- I do not want to mess his future up...

Thank you all for listening-

michelle

mbond_najee:

i hate to hear of these times, but every one of us has dealt or is dealing with it.  I have a 7 year old with the same issues, along with a speech and hearing problem.  These times DO get better.  you are in the right place.  I have dedicated my entire life to helping him.  My goals are selfish.  I suggest you have the same goals.  They are simple to say and i personally have found the schools and the doctors agree with me.  "Have my son to grow up and be an independent adult living out of my house."  the first time my son's dr heard that he said to achieve that will be what most parents only dream of.  So, my main suggestions are easy ones.  Find an ADHD support group and attend them.  they are very helpful.  I have done more reading than i care to go into, but the latest book is by dr. phil.  Family First.  Let me tell you, i have learned more about my behavior and how to better myself in dealing with my son.  I have seen a night and day differ just in the past month.  I have found that my approach has not been the best.  And now i am working on me, not so much on my son.  I have found that if i am a better person, in turn, i am a better mother.  ADHD kids know exactly what to do and what buttons to push.  Me knowing how to handle these within myself, let me tell you, it has made a HUGE differ.  I know some of you out there are thinking I'm crazy, but i have found more answers to the problems within my self.  NO one else knows you or your son better than you do.  I don't think sending your only child away to a school is a good answer.  That is just going to prolong the issues you will HAVE to deal with.  Doing it sooner than later is better.  Get your son to a good ADHD clinic and don't give up.  perhaps when you feel you are at your end, maybe that's really just the beginning.  God never gives us more than he can handle.  I wish I was there to help you and give you the break you are in MUCH need of.  Chin up and pray hard.  I have written several prayers that i say every day.  they are specific and detailed.  The very day i started saying them, the changes started taking place.  Now i have written prayers for my son to say, one before school and one at bed.  They are just as specific, but not as long.  I do hope this helps and if you need to scream, then go outside and do it.  i do (but i live in the boon docks).  email me anytime, I'm just an enter button away.  I'll be praying for you and your son.