Bossy daughter | ADHD Information

Hi,
I have 3 kids ages 8,10 and 13. The real problem i am having is with my 13 year old. She has hand ADHD since age 5. She curses,lies,cheats and steels. She bossys her two brothers who are 8 and 10 around. Just recently i hear her say to my youngest son "Go clean my rooom that way i wont get into troble and i will say i did it when i did not" I was shocked when i heard this because she was being so nice this week. When i confronted her about it she said "Its my room so i cleaned it." I had my husband talk to her and she blew on me told me "go die and burn in hell! im going out" So she calls her friend and they went to the mall.Shes scaring me. She dresses ok and everything like jeans and pink shirt. But this mouth has got to stop.My two sons told me they dont like their sister. It makes me cry! Any ideas on what i could do? Any advice would be appreciated    Since being diagnosed, have you implemented any interventions to manage her ADHD?
We have done the "Chore Chart" where she has to do a chore at a certin time or place in the house. That seemed to work for a while but not now. And i am pauls mom to answer your question, sometimes she gets so angry at me and the family we feel that we cant stop her or control her. I know she has poor impluse control which could also be a combination of teen hormons nd ADHD. But, as you all know, it could be so fustrating at times. Plus i have my to other boys 2 think about 2.

I totally feel for you.

My daughter will be 12 in April and we have our moments too.  She is bossy towards her little brother and talks back to us at times.  We don't allow her to get away with anything with us and are firm with our discipline.  She probably hates our guts but oh well.

I hope things work out with you and your daughter.  It could be a combination of ADHD and testing her boundaries with you also.  Stand firm with her and love her.  That is all you can do for now.

First lemme' say that when my daughter was 13 she didn't steal but all the rest she did do and she wasn't add/adhd; just a teenager. I really think that she shouldn't have able to go ANYWHERE with her talking to you that way. I'm pretty strict when it comes to being  respectful. I know this has to be doubly hard having a teen with hands on add (which by the way I don't have a clue as to what that is) my son is still in the evaluation stages. You've come to the right place; but I gotta ask...'why' did you let her go anywhere? Is it like you don't feel that you can 'stop' her? I know the feeling of being afraid of your child but it didn't happen to me until she was much older and thought she could do as she pleased...wasn't happening. I do feel that you and your family should (for your sake as well as the others in your house) some kind of couseling.

luvmykids123 wrote:
The real problem i am having is with my 13 year old. She has hand ADHD since age 5.

Since being diagnosed, have you implemented any interventions to manage her ADHD? At age 13, your also dealing with hormonal issues which would tend to ecaserbate her behavoirs. The lying, cheating and stealing is a cry for help and if a disorder is gone untreated, the older the child gets, the bigger the problems become. Please give more info as there is plenty that could be done to remove her from such a crisis mode. There are always people here that understand and are willing to help.