Hi,

I am beginning to get involved with a wonderful guy who has ADHD. Obviously for a non-ADHD person some of the symptoms are hard to deal with but I'm starting to instinctively understand the way the whole thing works - by talking to him, by reading up and just from the experience of being around him!

Here's the question though; when I introduce him to my friends (who are very important to me), he pretty much always embarrasses me by, as you have all described - being rude, being unfriendly and defensive, talking WAY TOO MUCH!!! I understand what's going on, and I know he is always aware of what he is doing - and usually my friends aren't judgemental about it at all.....but..The problem is that it always makes me tense, then he picks up on my annoyance and gets more nervous, it's like  vicious circle. When he finally does settle into a situation he's intelligent, interesting, quick witted and really funny. What can I do, firstly to make introducing him into my social circle easier for him to enjoy it, and secondly, to make sure that I deal with it better so as to not make him even more nervous?

I almost feel ashamed to be so...shallow...? about it - why should I care what anyone else thinks if I like him? But, I guess it just does matter, and he says it matters to him, and he wants to get better at making friends. I just want to address these issues early so they don't become too big to deal with later. I'd really appreciate any help you can offer!