Can you Function? | ADHD Information
I am developing some serious problems with doing the simplest of tasks & I was wondering if anyone else is experiencing these things. Here is a typical day for me:
*after going to bed at night and attempting to go to sleep at a decent hour. (Cannot go to sleep before 10 PM regardless of how early I need to get up. regardless of if I had caffeine or not I still can't sleep)
-struggle to sleep, daydream, stare at the ceiling mulling over each part of the day's events, one event leading to some other topic that didn't occur in the day, which then leads to things I daydream about starting or wan ting to do in the future...after 30-45 minutes later I remember I was supposed to be trying to sleep..finally fall asleep around 12-1 AM..wake up at 2-3 AM and wonder why I am not at work, see the clock, force myself to realize its 2-3 AM and not 2-3 PM, fall asleep again. Wake up when alarm goes off at 4 AM to get ready for work, feeling tired, hit snooze 7 times (sometimes turn whole alarm off), waking up at the last minute jumping out of bed at 5:15 in a frenzy and try to start preparing for work when I should have really left the house at 5:15 AM.
-preparing for work..I space out for 15-20 minutes daydreaming about things I want to do later in the day, things at work, future things, things I read in the newspaper or magazine (can't read books for having to re-read them, but hey, magazines are fun. The same magazine looks new to me each time I pick it up) 5:30 AM rolls around, I have missed my first bus of the day (can't save money to buy a car because I forget what I bought or forget to open the savings account I keep promising myself, or occasional impulse spending for at a time) I then go back to scrambling to get ready for work. By 5:45 I have forgotten I needed a shower & brush my teeth, then try to wash in a hurry, run out the door with the last clean clothes I could find in a hurry & run to the bus stop barely making the 6:15 AM bus.
-at work..forget various tasks on my spreadsheet because my eyes skip over them & I get reprimanded. I then gulp down an energy drink and take a caffeine tablet because it seems to be the only way to focus on even the simplest task. Struggle to get work done, but take 2-3 days doing the same work a normal person can do in 1 day. Boyfriend calls.."why were you talking to your EX????" (I lose interest and feel neglected so I talk to people I miss) I can't let go of anyone because I never really lost love feelings for them, I was just so utterly bored & I figure they are being dull stick in the muds around me because they don't understand me or don't want me and my strange habits. Communication then stops & the man is unwilling to put up with my constant high maintenance & wanting to be taken care of all the time.
-finally time to go home. Waiting on the train, I imagine in my mind all the things I need to work on at home so I can simplify my life-new tasks & goals etc. Finally, after 1 1/2 hours I arrive home & have forgotten all the tasks I set out to accomplish before bed. As boyfriend moves out of the apartment, I start zoning out again and feeling a bit sad that I ruined everything. Forget to make myself some food, get hungry and grab a snack. I then sit down at the computer and get distracted by the local newspaper online. I search for topics in search engines I want to research for the tasks I just remembered, then lose interest & start playing computer games. Get bored with one and try another. Finally time runs away with me..
-start preparing for bed...AND THE CYCLE STARTS YET AGAIN... 8 (
What do you mean, you are developing these problems? If you are AD/HD, these things will have been plaguing you your whole life.
For the record, except for talking to exes, yeah, this sounds like a typical day for me. Always has been.
bcgirl197838434.4308101852bcgirl is right, you should be able to look back at your childhood and see alot of these traits. You are descibe a very normal day for me most of the time. There are alot of even worst days. When I was dx'd I knew right away that the symptoms and problems that someone with ADHD goes through was exactly how I have been my whole life. It did trouble me a bit, but is also a relief. Now its been a couple months, the meds are working somewhat, but still trying to get those right, therapy has been great, and these group has been a huge relief. To see what others go through and know that this is real, that there is something that contributed to all the crap that I always thought was me just being a failure again and again, it is a rerlief. Now I just hope I'm able to control it more and do some of the things that I never could before. Its also nice to know that there are others out there who think just like me. To my friends and family I was just a weirdo sometimes, now I know that I'm not alone.
No, I know I have had all these problems all my life, however living at home growing up my parents always called me lazy & not attentive. They were constantly following me around fixing all the things I couldn't do. Now that I am realizing all these things about myself within the last couples months (I was too distracted to even notice there was a problem. I just assumed I was a bit slow even though my IQ suggest otherwise) - it's a sudden revelation that I am developing problems with others on a daily basis. Such as it may, you are right, I have always had these problems. It seems like they are new problems to me because it wasn't until a few months ago I took an ADD self-test on a Straterra website and scored off their scale. It was then I was like "wow..is this really me?" And I think back and recall everything I experienced since childhood has been the same way. I just had a better support system back then. Always someone to cover up my mistakes. Now I am living alone again and barely capable of even taking care of myself. Its an oddity that confounds me. Me, the perfectionist can't even take care of myself. Me, the girl that is always called highly intelligent, vividly creative, artistic & dreamy is dysfunctional in a way that is hurting all aspects of my daily life.
Reizende
I strongly suggest you seek the help of a professional.I understand now what you meant by "developing" these problems. You actually meant "began noticing" these probelms. LOL. I went through that phase myself, I suppose. I used to think that daydreaming 90% of your day away was normal. I used to think bouncing your leg when sitting for long periods was normal. I used to think putting off schoolwork til the last possible second was normal. But it's not!
It's when I started to realize that my dissatisfaction and loathing for my job (all my jobs) went well beyond the normal "work sucks but whadya gonna do" attitude, that I started to think maybe I had a real problem.
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It's when I started to realize that my dissatisfaction and loathing for my job (all my jobs) went well beyond the normal "work sucks but whadya gonna do" attitude, that I started to think maybe I had a real problem.
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LOL, and here I was thinking they were all bad jobs. Three years into every job I get to the point of not wanting to get out of bed. Plus theres so many things in the office to distract me. The radios, people with pictues posted all over the cubicles, neighbors gossiping which I can't tune out. My cubicle is very bland. I don't decorate it. I wouldn't get any work done if I did.
Yeah we all recognize this. The solution, not to say that any of us has really found it, is a combination of extrordinary discipline and workarounds. Force yourself to do the things you *can* do, but don't bother with the things you *can't* do.I found a job that, while the pay kinda sucks, I can fart around on the computer on most days. It's kindof what most people would call a deadend job, but it's added a great deal to my happiness.
Hey floof - a deadend job just really takes off all the pressure, doesn't it? I'd shovel sh*t for the rest of my life if I was happy at it.
You should go talk to somebody, just for the perspective it can offer. You described my day almost to a T as well. I don't suggest that you race out for meds - that's the last thing you hear from me here. But if you don't learn about ADHD and how to handle it then you are going to have much more serious problems manifest such as depression and anxiety issues. THEN you have a serious problem that will stop you in your tracks.
I believe that you can make your way out of this. Avoid self pity and do what you can to eat well. Best of luck
You know whats a funny thing? Out of all the boyfriends (and ex husbands) I have had in my lifetime, the only guy I NEVER got bored with was an ADHD guy I dated back in college. His mother came between us though.
Reizende
[Quote=Reizende]LOL, and here I was thinking they were all bad jobs. Three years into every job I get to the point of not wanting to get out of bed. Plus theres so many things in the office to distract me. The radios, people with pictues posted all over the cubicles, neighbors gossiping which I can't tune out. My cubicle is very bland. I don't decorate it. I wouldn't get any work done if I did[/quote]Three years into each job! That's pretty good, Reizende! Should I have been so lucky, before either being bored to death and quitting, forced to quit or fired.
My worst problem at jobs was the neighbors gossiping...not only was it distracting, but exacerbated me to no end that only I was "earning" my paycheck. ADHDers are very often sound and visual sensitive.
Welcome to the discovery of the ADHD world! I agree, and suggest you see your doctor or a ADHD professional.
Deadend jobs if they are fun or interesting are actually quite satisfying in a way. Better to earn 0 a week doing something fun and easy than something boring, or where you actually have to do work. I had a great temp job as a tearsheet coordinator for some media company. They placed ads strategically in newspapers and magazines for their clients and then sent a copy of the ad as 'proof' that it was in a good position.
I read magazines and newspapers for 7.5 hours a day 5 days a week (I love reading the newspaper!) and then ripped out an ad when I saw it. Easy! Think I was supposed to just flick but I can't flick through a newspaper without reading every single article, must be the OCD in me.
I think my ideal job would be one not requiring computer use because I just surf the net all day long looking up interesting things, instead of work. Google is my best friend.