hi barb thank you for your kind words of support. I really appreciate it yes it is difficult and sometimes i feel like running a mile but your absolutely right i wouldn't swap my son for anyone else.
the psych has recommended concerta xl which we started on Monday, john seems to think its helping him and on monday and tuesday i had to keep checking on him as he was so quiet, i thought he must be sleeping but he was just really chilled. It was so unreal but a relief as well if you know what i mean i'm sure you do i'm not giving him it at weekends just for school.
yes i did know about the dyslexics i told john all about richard branson and how he has dyslexia, so he is quiet happy to turn out like him i think. well i could talk for scotland so i'll say bye for now and thanks again it's good to know other people understand where your coming from any time you feel like a chat just drop me a line cheers norma x
Hi my name is norma,
my son was diagnosed adhd, dyslexic and dyspraxic privately in January today we have our first appointment with an NHS Psychiatrist, my stomach is churning I don't know what to expect! All the doubts are creeping back in what if he says I'm just a crap parent? blah blah!
In moments of clarity this isn't a problem right now it's crippling me. My mind has frozen all the research i've done has run from me i can't think straight how am i going to help my boy when i can't even form words?
I have another horrendous fear after reading the indicators for ODD I think maybe this is a problem for us too. Or is it me that's the problem looking for excuses for a child who just does what he wants when he wants cos I'm to soft? has anyone else felt like this? Am i looking for problems where there are none should i take the advice of my family who think a slap will sort out this 9 year old "bad boy". I love my son I want the best for him but right now i am a mumbling wreck. can anyone advise?? this has been a long road and there still seems no end the behaviuor escalates beyond proportion sometimes but compared to some he is an angel! Is it me who is the problem? NORMA going nuts!
well, technically i am only 17, but i do believe that i am pretty mature for my age considering how my generation is. i dunno, people with adhd are weird, and alot of times they have something else wrong with them that is usually linked to the adhd. like depression or whatever. i dont kno ur son or how he acts or the things he does, but if u gave me an example of something that he does i might be able to tell u why he did it or something considering the facts. i do kno something tho, alot of times, adhd people will do things that they arent really aware of. like saying something or doing something, etc. i kno i can talk up a storm with people about nothing and i do tend to be rude and mean to people without really realizing it or meaning to and then later i'm like, "what was i thinkin." and alot of the times i will be talking about something and then i'll pause and then i'll be like, "what was i just talking about?" its very stressful. and people with adhd dont really have a good memory with most things. i dunno why, at least in my case and a friend of mine's case we dont. but yea, just write me back with something and i'll let you kno what i think. Laters.cheers i really appreciate it. John also has learning difficulties dyspraxia and dyslexia but, as you are he is very bright and perceptive. he acts before he thinks most of the time and although i understand most of the time every now and then i lose it. it's more other people's perception of him when i am not there to intervene. For example at school when he argues back with the teacher and loses his temper when she tries to TELL! him (a mistake in my opinion) to sit down and be quiet, or when he gets into a fight with another boy because the boy has accidently brushed past him and he doesn't stop to think it could have been an accident. always on the defensive with everyone hostile towards anyone who takes my attention away from him and thats just family. he seems unsettled around people but so enjoys company. aggressive at times openly defiant ie "please stop spitting" he looks you in the eye and then you got it spits anyway!!
affectionate beyond belief and then in an instant really defensive and angry, for what seems no apparent reason, but it may be as subtle as me moving my arm whilst hugging him or stroking his hair.
yesterday he was with his little cousin who fell on stinging nettles john handed him another bunch of stinging nettles and told him it was a dock leaf and would make him better. yes i agree a typical boy thing to do however, his uncle told him it wasn't a very nice thing to do and that it had mad his cousin sad and upset.
a few hours later a similar occasion arose with another child. john done exactly the same thing to this child. Now it is percieved as cruel as it was only explained to him a few hours before hand. you and i both know at that moment John just acted without thinking but the other adults in the company just thought he was being nasty and i had to make him sit out from playing with the other children in an attempt to try and teach him he has to be kind to others, i don't know what else to do in such situations especially when i have my family telling me he needs to be smacked or punished in another way.
thats hopefully where you could open my eyes as john can't seem to explain it to me. although i have noticed a difference in him as we started the concerta (ritalin) 2 weeks ago now. he said it helps him "concentrate and his writing (normally a nightmare for him) is really good" when i pushed without trying to put words in his mouth he said it helps me think better! do you know anything about that are you taking medication yourself, what about your diet do you have a special diet i read that a diet of fresh fruit,wheat pulses beans ect was better than one with meat, poultry eggs ect. for adhd sufferers. i suppose i want to know of practical things i can do to encourage john to believe in himself as he does have very low self esteem and so despretely wants to fit in and be "normal" he FEELS he is different, i want him to feel special and "good enough". well i could bend your ears untill next december but i'll say bye for now and look forward to reading your opinions and views. take care of you ya wee Angel x norma
Hi,
iamadhd, I read your post and I am VERY interested in picking your brain. Actualy, my 20 yr. old has ADHD and I am always looking for ways to better understand and help him. I would like your honest input on what its like for you as an adult with ADHD. I know what its like for me as a loving mom who refuses to give up on her ADHD son, but I can only guess what it must be like for him as I watch him struggle. I am very much looking forward to hearing from you.
Ruby
ps did you get a message from "smother" as she sent one to me but it was addressed to you as her son is 20 and has adhd and she wanted to pick your brain she sounds like she would really appreciate and benifit from any insight you have. take care and thank you maybe you are to be the voice of adhd who knows?
smile norma x
i'm 17, and i'm adhd, kids with adhd are usually far from angels as they can get. its very hard to understand someone with ADHD unless u have it urself. i also have a friend with adhd and alot of her friends dont understand the things she does alot of the times, and yet i kno exactly where she is coming from.Norma,