An ADD Pack Rat | ADHD Information
I have always had the tendency to be lazy on TOP of the ADD. Could that be contrued as ADD also? Or just the reluctance, avoidance & boredom involved? For instance..I do NOT make a conscious effort to make my apartment a mess...it's unintended. However when I think "I need to clean my apartment" I think "I don't wanna" and go do some arts & crafts or play computer games. My mind is in a state of constant wandering and it is often very difficult to perform even a simple task like matching and stapling documents. Could it be that all of this "laziness" is simply due to a lifetime of coping with the ADD and compensating by total avoidance? When I start cleaning my apartment, I somehow get caught up in bits and pieces and dwell on them. The only way I can achieve any cleaning at all (if I do) is to walk in a room with a giant box and start swiping everything off into it. Then pick it out of the box 1 piece at a time and put it away (8 hours later that room is done). My family and friends always called it lazy cleaning. After 33 years of my life, I have accumulated 5-10 boxes of different decades. It used to be 20-30 boxes..somestimes rooms-full stacked ceiling high, but people have helped me throw things away on occasion. I am not trying to be a packrat. I just go back to a box and all the stuff inside looks new to me. 8([QUOTE=Reizende]...Could it be that all of this "laziness" is simply due to a lifetime of coping with the ADD and compensating by total avoidance? [/quote]Now that's actually an interesting concept, seriously. I mean, I always thought ADHDers were "lazy" because of lack of concentration, focus, motivation. But I never thought of it this way. What does anyone else thing about that?
[QUOTE=Reizende]When I start cleaning my apartment, I somehow get caught up in bits and pieces and dwell on them. The only way I can achieve any cleaning at all (if I do) is to walk in a room with a giant box and start swiping everything off into it. Then pick it out of the box 1 piece at a time and put it away (8 hours later that room is done). [/quote]
That's also the only way I can clean, however, sometimes the boxes remain for a long time before I actually finish removing a piece at at time.
[quote=Reizende]....I just go back to a box and all the stuff inside looks new to me. ([/QUOTE]
Me too! It's like going shopping all over again!GypsyWomyn38441.6I have moved 2-3 times in my life and dragged all the boxes with me..still 1-2 boxes left from my first house. heheI think one reason I moved so many times in my lifetime (so far) is because when things got too out of control (mess), moving would force me to pack up everything (or sell off most) and start over....just to find myself right back in the same situation.
And it's awful right now, because I can't move from where I am, at least for now....and it's a disaster! 
I think I am lazy because I am mentally tired. My mind is always racing at a million miles per hour that I always feel exhausted.
But when I do get up and focus on something and do it - like housework - I start to feel better.
[QUOTE=Reizende]When I start cleaning my apartment, I somehow get caught up in bits and pieces and dwell on them. [/QUOTE]
I will start trying to sweep the kitchen floor, and then get obsessed. every spot, every impurification every dot, every hair MUST BE REMOVED FROM THE KITCHEN FLOOR! MY MISSION MUST BE ACCOMPLISHED!!
and I will spend an hour on my kitchen floor trying to get it right....
then get frustrated and tired, and worn out, and flop down on the couch and remain there for the next 3 hours napping.....that is my day's work worth of housework.
sonya_h38451.7606828704That's why I just ignore the whole apartment. Eventually it will all just go away. 8)[QUOTE=Rae70]I think I am lazy because I am mentally tired. [/QUOTE]
That is the way I feel with my new job, when I get home, or in the weekends, I totally crash, and can't do anythign, don't want to meet anyone...
Andmy room is a mess, it just takes hours and hours to tidy. Do people with tidy rooms spend hours and hours keeping it tidy, maybe we just aren't realistic about the time it takes to keep thigns clean?
Thats kindof how I clean although my stuff is in bags. It's even worse now that my 5 year old is in school and brings home all of her papers. I feel guilty about throwing them away. I also have a problem with magazines that people give me to read, I always feel like there is something I might need to know. Recently however my mom tried to give me some and I told her NO because they would add to the clutter knowing that I would have a problem throwing them out. Food in the frige is a problem too, I feel guilty throwing it out so my poor dog is quite overweight due to the fact that it goes to her. Luckily I took wellbutrin that worked for about 6 months that helped my purge my masses of stuff so at least it's semi-controllable now but I really have to activly question my reasons for needing to keep things. Sonia you sound like my husband when he decides to help me out around the house and do something he takes all day to get evey hair or crumb. For example vacumming he will when motivated move the couch and tables everything and obsess over it until it is done they way he wants it. As for packratting big time, sometimes I wait for him to leave to get rid of some things or go through it with him box by box. Due to his obsession of collecting car parts and projects he wanted to do but did not our yard looks like "white trash". I am happy to say he agreed with me to let me help him get rid of some to clean up the place.Gypsy Womyn,
Thank you for your reply, I have a huge canvas that I am planning to take my daughters art and cool school projects and turn then into a collage (sp) that way I can keep them in one space and have a interesting peice of art as well. Right now I have her help me decide what to keep (the best things) and then hopefully this summer we can create the canvas together.
I like that you have her help you decide which to keep![quote=Taag Man]I would call it a symptom of ADD, we do have trouble doing things that requires mental effort... and trivial daily stuff we ought to do, just is not stimulating... hence, we can't assemble the mental capacity to do it... and therefor we aren't motivated
Coping is a very different thing in my opinion. Coping is something we do, because it caries something positive with it. Coping is when we somehow manage to get all those daily stuff done..
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Absolutely, I agree that is a good explanation of why we AD/HDers lack motivation. And coping is how AD/HDers manage somehow to do those things less stimulating, regardless of motivation. I believe lack of motivation and coping both go hand-in-hand and is how most of us have been able to survive thus far.
Now I understand the term 'pack-rat' applying to us when we don't get rid of anything. But why, oh, why can't we stop bringing more stuff in!?! Urgh! I don't see the connection to ADHD for new stuff arriving, just no old stuff leaving.
GypsyWomyn38452.6119791667Psychgirl! I'm proud of you for saying 'no' to more magazines!
However, I hope you at least keep some of your 5-yr-old's art work. Get a manilla folder and stick em in there. It'll be flat and can fit flat against your closet wall. Down the road, you'll be glad you did (and so will they). I loved looking at some of the things my mom saved from my grade school days. So, No more guilt!!! Except... for maybe over feeding your puppy dog. [QUOTE=GypsyWomyn][QUOTE=Reizende]...Could it be that all of this "laziness" is simply due to a lifetime of coping with the ADD and compensating by total avoidance? [/quote]
Now that's actually an interesting concept, seriously. I mean, I always thought ADHDers were "lazy" because of lack of concentration, focus, motivation. But I never thought of it this way. What does anyone else thing about that? 
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I would call it a symptom of ADD, we do have trouble doing things that requires mental effort... and trivial daily stuff we ought to do, just is not stimulating... hence, we can't assemble the mental capacity to do it... and therefor we aren't motivated
Coping is a very different thing in my opinion. Coping is something we do, because it caries something positive with it. Coping is when we somehow manage to get all those daily stuff done...
!DON'T ask me how... I have no idea
[QUOTE=GypsyWomyn]Now I understand the term 'pack-rat' applying to us when we don't get rid of anything. But why, oh, why can't we stop bringing more stuff in!?! Urgh! I don't see the connection to ADHD for new stuff arriving, just no old stuff leaving.
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Now I belive that must be the stimulation thing knocking in again... Getting new stuff gives us joy (dopamin) for a while... and that is why we are impulsive... because we most of the time are low on dopamin, and that makes quick stimulation very attractive... like buying a new PC... 
''Could it be that all of this "laziness" is simply due to a lifetime of coping with the ADD and compensating by total avoidance?''
I have thought of this several times. Sometimes I wonder if I was just "trained" to be this way.
[QUOTE=Sunshine2]''Could it be that all of this "laziness" is simply due to a lifetime of coping with the ADD and compensating by total avoidance?''
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aaah avoidance, have we stumbled across a keyword here? I think I organise my life around avoidance.
[quote=madhdline]aaah avoidance, have we stumbled across a keyword here? I think I organise my life around avoidance.[/quote] Well said! What time is it in Belgium, besides time to carry on with avoiding the things we need to get done?
I can't get rid of that...... I may need it tomorrow
lol I'm the same way Reizende. I have no interest in cleaning whatsoever so I just put it off and put it off and just avoid doing it. If someone were to come over, 'd just straighten the house really fast but not do any serious cleaning. LOL. I'd make it look presentable and neat but not take the time to do everything PERFECT. As you can see, I'm no perfectionist lol. Reizende we have a lot in common with the whole hating cleaning thing lol. I want a maid dont you? wouldnt that be wonderful? to hire a maid to clean our places for us? lol. I'm lazy too besides the ADD. We sound alike with the lazy, avoiding cleaning stuff. [QUOTE=Taag Man] I would call it a symptom of ADD, we do have trouble doing things that requires mental effort... and trivial daily stuff we ought to do, just is not stimulating... hence, we can't assemble the mental capacity to do it... and therefor we aren't motivated
Coping is a very different thing in my opinion. Coping is something we do, because it caries something positive with it. Coping is when we somehow manage to get all those daily stuff done...
!DON'T ask me how... I have no idea
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Well, honestly..I avoid cleaning because I have no interest in it. When I was younger I cared what my friends and relatives thought of the mess, but nowadays no one visits so I figure why bother. 8) I do scramble around if there will be guests. Overall, I just hate cleaning. I want a tidy place, I just don't want to be the one to do it, so in essense, on top of the ADD, I am lazy as well, if not a side effect already. hehehe
A maid sounds great, but then, Princess and Reizende, would either of you be one of those people who clean their house before the maid comes? Wow!!! I see my self her in so many emails...i really need to go get diagnosed...i took a 10 question quiz in my doctors office and it was high for ADD, then went to see a psychologist and he dosn't think it is ADD and thinks it is more anxiety. I tried straterra for a few months but quit it because of side effects, and questioned if it was actually working.
I totally can not keep a house...i actually have to take vacation time, just to "de clutter" and still never get it all done. My "house" living room, kitche, and bathroom look great for me right now...but my bedroom is scary!!! everything goes there...cuz i can close the door :) - heck my 12 yo son keeps a cleaner room than me.
I do the box thing too. Found a suite case full of catalogs from 3 moves ago (scary) because i wanted to schread the personal information, but never did. I am a piler and have a very difficult making homes for things...all my friends say..just put it away...the problem they do not understand is that I do not know how to make a "place" for something. I get so consumed and overfocused on how to do something like that that it is frustrating that I wont / dont even try.
Does any one have any tips on how to keep up on the clutter and filing things? It is really embarrsing - it is not that i want to live like a "slob" i just can not complet the task to follow through. Especially when we have busy weeks...my house can turn into a disaster ground in 2 days flat, remain that way for 2 months, and take a week to clean!!! UGHHHH!!!
[QUOTE=GypsyWomyn][quote=madhdline]aaah avoidance, have we stumbled across a keyword here? I think I organise my life around avoidance.[/quote] Well said! What time is it in Belgium, besides time to carry on with avoiding the things we need to get done?
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Time to go to bed :-) I have started a new job a while back, and it is getting more and more difficult as time is progressing. I feel tired all the time, mess everything up all the time, and am starting to dread the next session of messing things up... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
My hubby is a "piler" and I am a hoarder (for those who don't know we both are AD(H)D), because I might need it later. The problem is that I can never find it in the many boxes stuffed in closets so I have to go out and buy another one anyway. Then the cycle begins again. I do have to agree with others who have said that it's fun going through the boxes later down the road.
My honey's piles just drive me crazy. He'll try to be a great guy and pick up the house, but all he does is throw everything into piles. After awhile of staring at all these piles I will finally go through them and I will find junkmail, screws, and various doo-dads, and it will be for things that we would never need or use. Somehow I manage to weed the junk from the stuff we need, and by time I'm done w/ that I am so burnt out all I can do is throw it into another box, throw it on top of the other boxes of stuff in the overflowing closets, and shut the door. 
But what can I say my boxes and boxes of stuff drives him crazy. We are just a match made in heaven. LOL
I love my piles. I love to make piles, sort piles, build them up, tear them down. For some reason a stack of reading makes be comfortable. And I collect far too much media: a few thousand books, lord knows how many CD and old records, DVDs, etc. But we still manage to have a somewhat clean house. My wife is from old German stock, plus her dad was in the US Army, so she can be an exacting neat freak. I just try my best to keep up.