Why me? | ADHD Information

Why me?I have been asking myself this for a long time but today I ask even more.i am 27 years old and i am ADD and i have 2 beautiful children with ADD and ADHD aslo.I have always struggled in school but today was not good.I  have finally gotten the time to go back to finish my high school so i can make something of myself,I cant even study in class to take my ged test.I struggle to even concentrate to read and answer questions on a pretest.WHY?I cant take this much longer.i left school early tonight crying because I couldnt do it.I even started ritalin la 20 mg last week and at home i can read but at school its like i freeze and my mind goes dumb.
Im sorry i am just rambling on but i am VERY stressed.Do not know what to do.

If you have time could you respond and give me some tips on what i can do .


Sandra
 You could just as easily ask, "why NOT me?" Maybe you're stronger than other people and are able to handle it, even if it's difficult for you.
 I used to ask why me after my mom and little brother were killed in a crash. But bad things happen to people every day. Instead of wondering about a question you can never possibly answer, try to think of what strengths YOU have that other people don't. Why not you? After all, you're hard-working, intelligent, creative, and are raising two great kids. You can handle it. It may not be fair, but that's beside the point. You can't change the fact that you have ADD or bargain your way out of it, you can only respond.
One thing that I've found has worked for me is an mongrelized version of autogenic  relaxation.  Basically, it is a sort of self-hypnosis, meditation,  relazation technique. You can find long complicated versions by googling "Autogenic relaxation" or "Progressive Muscle Relaxation".

My version takes between 20 and 30 minutes at first, later on you can zap your tension in just a few minutes.

Lie down.
Take 3 slow deep breaths....filling your abdomen then your chest slowly.   Tell yourself (all talk is silent) "With each breath out I can feel the tension flowing out of my body"

Then start with your feet and repeat "My feet are becoming slightly warm, heavy and relaxed." Repeat very slowly.

"My ankles are becoming slightly warm, heavy and relaxed" Repeat

And so on...

When youve finished your body you can walk slowly down ten mental steps to some happy, relaxing place that you'd like to be.  Mentally hang out telling yourself that x or y is okay or some other affirmation then walk up and out.

You can end by telling yourself to go to sleep or rise refreshed and relaxed.

Check here for more tips  or related information
http://www.guidetopsychology.com/autogen.htm
http://www.guidetopsychology.com/pmr.htm

ghead

Ps I've got two kids also and am going to university full time--I feel your pain. < =""> Can you do an entirely at-home version? I've always found I do better with schoolwork when I am not restricted by boundaries - classes, due dates, sit-down exams, etc.

If you are finding you are able to study at home, then seriously think about looking into distance ed.


[QUOTE=DesertHanyou]Instead of wondering about a question you can never possibly answer, try to think of what strengths YOU have that other people don't.
[/QUOTE]


I agree with this post in general.  Said another way, ADD forces me to go through day-to-day living without a "filter."  I can't simply look at a news article, my work, or just about anything without awareness of its connections in a hundred or a thousand different directions.  Its as if I opened up my computer or some much larger, more complex piece of electrical equipment and all the wires are pulsing and doing their thing and I can see, or feel as if I see, all their various functions, causes, and effects -- but not nearly in such a useful way. 

Everything and everyone seems, to me, to be this huge, amazingly complex system of connections -- good or bad.  The daily news can either make me horribly depressed or very hopeful, but usually it just leaves me feeling confused, dim-witted, and helpless.  The occasional upside is being able to solve problems or make connections between ideas that might normally be missed. 

To try and sum up:  I believe ADD'ers are very aware, if painfully, of "everything."  I've spent about half my life wishing I could be less like this, but I don't know that I could handle feeling so "tuned out."  I'd probably be more "successful" but I'm afraid if I were "cured" I'd eventually figure out that I was missing the big picture.

This has been a very rambling way of trying to wax philosophical/grateful about ADD.  I can't believe how long it took me to write this...  ;-)

[Quote=John K.]To try and sum up: I believe ADD'ers are very aware, if painfully, of "everything." I've spent about half my life wishing I could be less like this, but I don't know that I could handle feeling so "tuned out." I'd probably be more "successful" but I'm afraid if I were "cured" I'd eventually figure out that I was missing the big picture...

....I can't believe how long it took me to write this... ;-)[/quote]

Well done, John! And welcome to the Board!

That we are painfully aware of "everything"... if only 'normal' people could realize this is precisely what's going in our heads. I'm just very pleased with how you expressed yourself. It sits well with me, John. Thanks!